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Gender Identity Theory / Reincarnation

Thanks for posting -- interesting. Also, it's probably not uncommon for one twin to be gay, and the other not. There's a whole lot of things at play there. Reincarnation is a factor that stands out to me.
 
CanSol, thank you, the case was quite new to me. To me it supports the reincarnation idea. How else would you explain that one monozygotic female twin feels male ? Most likely same nature, same nurture.
here´s the link to the documentary (in german, on 3Sat):

http://www.3sat.de/mediathek/?mode=play&obj=78256
can only be watched in Germany, Switzerland and Austria, like others don't speak the language o_O could take my laptop since I'm about 5km from the border but that's rediculous

but youtube has qite a few vids on the subject like this one
 
It would be interesting to understand better this case. So the twins were monozygotic, but did they share the same placenta and/or amniotic bag (see Wikipedia)?. Could that have caused different exposure to hormones? (Quite possibly). Interesting! :)
 
Here's me having another muse about gender...

Deep down, I'm not sure medical transition is right for me. I'm not sure I can live a life where I'm always wondering how folks perceive me. I can't ever be a biological man. I can't ever be that guy. I am a biological woman, who has birthed three kids for Pete's sake. Being 5 ft 3, and a petite little bodied thing I'm never gonna be a strapping 6 ft Green Beret... and actually, maybe that's the point. I recall as Terry how my own body was a barrier between myself and the world in the end. No one could get through my barriers. I've not shared this far and wide, but I've seen quite vividly that abuse happened to me as a child as Terry -- this was damaging to me, me who was then quite a sensitive boy. The need for that protective shell that was my body was very strong in that life. Yet I know how I felt, I've seen how I felt in my memories, and deep down, I was very, very vulnerable. Flip to this life where I've always been small, vulnerable. It's been so hard to accept this is my body now. My life has been in a way that I've had to wear my heart on my sleeve, and there's no barriers. Do I really want to create another hard shell that I've worked so hard to move away from?

Social expectations of gender is what creates a lot of the misery we all face. We, as a society, need to move forward and start removing those constraints. On top of that I have mental health issues separate from my body issues, some of those issues are tightly entwined with all the rubbish I left behind as Terry. Often it's a case of where does the gender dysphoria begin, and where does my mental illness end... no doubt there are issues with my gender and body. If anything, this journey has helped break through my own barriers towards my identity, towards whatever societal expectations I'd unwittingly placed on myself, and also moving towards acceptance to who I am now in this present time.

The video I posted are two folks who identify as non-binary. I thought the movie was interesting because they are moving towards accepting themselves. I've seen that in another video they described how, after transitioning, they realised that in living fully as their gender identities they had actually taken on all the associated gender expectations of the reverse. They both said they no longer wish to be seen as male, or female. But did they have to transition to see that? Could that acceptance be attained prior to medical intervention? I can't talk for anyone else. Everyone has to find their own pathway...

You would think at twenty-eight it would be a whole lot clearer for someone like me!
 
Deep down, I'm not sure medical transition is right for me. I'm not sure I can live a life where I'm always wondering how folks perceive me. I can't ever be a biological man. I can't ever be that guy. I am a biological woman, who has birthed three kids for Pete's sake. Being 5 ft 3, and a petite little bodied thing I'm never gonna be a strapping 6 ft Green Beret... and actually, maybe that's the point.

I just wanted to commiserate with you for a moment; I have the same exact and opposite issue: I am a strapping 5'10" guy who lugged a rifle through the desert. I am never going to be the cute, dance mom I want to be or know I am in my heart. When I was younger, I had that body, but it didn't last long and I've often thought the same thing as you.. maybe that's the point.

Both my last two lives (male then female) were petite. Maybe because now hormones and surgery are a viable option, I conspired against myself to take the option off the table because there's something I need to do or learn in this life.

I know it's centered around my wife though. My body now is almost exactly the same as it was when I was my great grandfather and I was married to her then too. I think she's trying between two lives to overcome her issues and I'm playing my part. I wouldn't be able to do that if I were female or transitioned.

Did you ever read Michael Newton's journey of souls? There's a case study in it that reminds me a lot of you. There was a woman who kept having issues in her life and she ended up learning that her past life was a man named Jeff who lived in the 1800's. He sounds like how you describe Terry; except he had a long mustache he enjoyed twirling the ends of. Her current life was that of a delicate business woman and she couldn't get the hang of being vulnerable and female. to bring balance to her natural male energy.

It's worth a read if you haven't read it. It's a good book.
 
The video I posted are two folks who identify as non-binary. I thought the movie was interesting because they are moving towards accepting themselves. I've seen that in another video they described how, after transitioning, they realised that in living fully as their gender identities they had actually taken on all the associated gender expectations of the reverse. They both said they no longer wish to be seen as male, or female. But did they have to transition to see that? Could that acceptance be attained prior to medical intervention? I can't talk for anyone else. Everyone has to find their own pathway...

You would think at twenty-eight it would be a whole lot clearer for someone like me!

No worries - even at thirty-nine to some (me) it´s not that clear :-D
You know I hope you find a suitable solution for yourself!

It is difficult for sure. I wrote somewhere that transition wouldn´t make me happier but in reality, I don´t know, I doubt that. I´m someone who avoids looking into the mirror and who doesn´t use the bath tub. I wanted to force myself to accept my body and denied it all for a very long time. And it´s not about me thinking I wouldn´t look good enough. I do. ;-) It´s obvious that transition would make me personally happier if it wasn´t for the circumstances - kids & family.
BTW my height would be OK too 5ft8. ;-)
But of course none of us can continue a previous lifetime as long as you´re not the highlander :-D
 
I just wanted to commiserate with you for a moment; I have the same exact and opposite issue: I am a strapping 5'10" guy who lugged a rifle through the desert. I am never going to be the cute, dance mom I want to be or know I am in my heart. When I was younger, I had that body, but it didn't last long and I've often thought the same thing as you.. maybe that's the point.

Both my last two lives (male then female) were petite. Maybe because now hormones and surgery are a viable option, I conspired against myself to take the option off the table because there's something I need to do or learn in this life.

I know it's centered around my wife though. My body now is almost exactly the same as it was when I was my great grandfather and I was married to her then too. I think she's trying between two lives to overcome her issues and I'm playing my part. I wouldn't be able to do that if I were female or transitioned.

Did you ever read Michael Newton's journey of souls? There's a case study in it that reminds me a lot of you. There was a woman who kept having issues in her life and she ended up learning that her past life was a man named Jeff who lived in the 1800's. He sounds like how you describe Terry; except he had a long mustache he enjoyed twirling the ends of. Her current life was that of a delicate business woman and she couldn't get the hang of being vulnerable and female. to bring balance to her natural male energy.

It's worth a read if you haven't read it. It's a good book.

Many thanks Totoro for your heart filled message. How funny that we are opposites. But, maybe in a sense, we are one and the same. I’ve often wondered if Terry felt me deep down in his heart. In fact, it might sound a bit strange, but I had a few odd memories come to me once out of the blue. In one of them Terry was suffering terribly as a POW to the point he had regular hallucinations. In one of those hallucinations he saw me (when I had long blonde hair) and it seemed like me (future me then, but present me now) was consoling him in his suffering. He didn’t know what to think of it. I think maybe he thought I was an angel or something because that worked within his belief framework of being bought up Catholic.

What I struggle with is being gender non conforming whilst people read me female. So many expectations are placed on women. Shaving, plucking, looking acceptable. For years I had been following this to a certain extent just because it’s expected. Now I’ve examined it and questioned it and I don’t want to do it, so I don’t. I’m a low key person who just wants to roll out of bed and throw on a pair of jeans. I want to shower in five minutes and I don’t want to deal with brushing and grooming hair. Having short hair allows me to do that. Why should only bio males have that privilege?

That’s just an example of one thing that immensely bothers me.

The other aspects are down to how this life is rolling out and how I’m living this life. Pretty much the opposite of Terry and for someone like me it feels soul crushing at times.
 
No worries - even at thirty-nine to some (me) it´s not that clear :-D
You know I hope you find a suitable solution for yourself!

It is difficult for sure. I wrote somewhere that transition wouldn´t make me happier but in reality, I don´t know, I doubt that. I´m someone who avoids looking into the mirror and who doesn´t use the bath tub. I wanted to force myself to accept my body and denied it all for a very long time. And it´s not about me thinking I wouldn´t look good enough. I do. ;-) It´s obvious that transition would make me personally happier if it wasn´t for the circumstances - kids & family.
BTW my height would be OK too 5ft8. ;-)
But of course none of us can continue a previous lifetime as long as you´re not the highlander :-D

Kids & family — yup. I’m pretty sure this wouldn’t be an issue if I hadn’t my kids and family. It would be my choice alone.

I used to avoid the mirror, too, but now I have my hair cut like a man’s it’s a lot easier. That is something so simple to do and doesn’t require medical intervention.

I’m not sure. I’m on a trans support group and I’m turning on my critical mind to the whole process. A large portion of it is too body centric, too obsessed with the body — focusing on my body makes me miserable. Other aspects are more disturbing. Am not sure that everyone who transitions needs to transition — folks seem to have underlying mental problems apart from body dysphoria and transitioning can seem like the golden ticket to the end of those problems. If I said this to anyone there I would be called transphobic and kicked out. That doesn’t seem right...

The other aspect that someone pointed out is that folks will have to treat you in a way where they know you were born female but will tread on eggshells not to say the wrong thing (she/her/lady etc) in order not to cause offence. And believe me if you see yourself as male and someone unwittingly genders you wrong it is offensive and it hurts. Do I want to be living with that my entire life?
 
I understand the practical reasons for short hair. But long hair for men has been a norm during many historical times, and today it is still the norm for some men to wear their hair long. However this does not relate directly to gender, only to preference. In some it may be a rebellious act, in others one of conformity, in others it is simply how they are. Still, I do understand that expectations in general are that females are well-presented while men may be unkempt. In this respect, a man with longer hair may continue to be unkempt - perhaps, though not necessarily.
 
I’ve often wondered if Terry felt me deep down in his heart. In fact, it might sound a bit strange, but I had a few odd memories come to me once out of the blue. In one of them Terry was suffering terribly as a POW to the point he had regular hallucinations. In one of those hallucinations he saw me (when I had long blonde hair) and it seemed like me (future me then, but present me now) was consoling him in his suffering. He didn’t know what to think of it. I think maybe he thought I was an angel or something because that worked within his belief framework of being bought up Catholic.
Wow, that's an interesting experience. You're saying he saw his future-life self comforting him? Was this do you think as a result of your own activities in this life, that is did you actively participate in being there in that vision, or was it only something you understood as a bystander, a spectator in that scene?
 
Wow, that's an interesting experience. You're saying he saw his future-life self comforting him? Was this do you think as a result of your own activities in this life, that is did you actively participate in being there in that vision, or was it only something you understood as a bystander, a spectator in that scene?

I don't recall when I would have done this, but I have a theory when it might of happened. Back when I was around fifteen, my sister came down with an infection which caused her to constantly throw up. I have, since childhood, suffered with extreme emetophobia. It was a sunny day so I stayed out all day to avoid her (my way of dealing with this has always been avoidance). When I came back I felt very ill, not sure if I had sunstroke or maybe a virus or both. I recall I couldn't eat for days afterwards and felt dizzy whenever I stood. I lost quite a bit of weight, and recall lying on bed very weak, not having eaten for days. The desperation was horrible.

I looked younger than me presently when that memory of Terry came to me. Some part of me wonders if there was some bridge between us in that shared suffering. He didn't see me physically but as a spirit/being that he interpreted as an angel. The depth of his suffering, the lack of nutrients & the dehydration caused by the dysentery caused him to hallucinate. As for present me, I do recall at the time thinking about my past self. I wasn't aware of the full aspects of my past life then but knew my intense feelings & phobia were related to my past life. It's possible it happened whilst I was sleeping.

It's pretty hard to grasp -- but I have since read the author Jenny Cockell talk about in her visions of future lives that her future self would sometimes be in meditative states and have awareness of her past self (her current life) whilst she was aware of her future life. Sort of like a bridge between the past & future.

Having said that -- this happened to me before w/ a lifetime that I don't recall much of. As a teenager when I was meditating out of the blue I saw myself as a middle aged man meditating in a temple with a shaved head (it looked like India or a similar country) in my vision I was meditating, too -- my past (or other?) self was aware of current me being present in that moment. It was very surreal.
 
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I understand the practical reasons for short hair. But long hair for men has been a norm during many historical times, and today it is still the norm for some men to wear their hair long. However this does not relate directly to gender, only to preference. In some it may be a rebellious act, in others one of conformity, in others it is simply how they are. Still, I do understand that expectations in general are that females are well-presented while men may be unkempt. In this respect, a man with longer hair may continue to be unkempt - perhaps, though not necessarily.

The issue too is that women are supposed to be essentially hairless beings apart from on their head where you are supposed to have a mane of luscious shiny hair. In adulthood my hair became very wiry, coarse, not feminine at all, and my body is a hairy little thing. It's hard to get out of the 'what is expected of you' box. Of course men with long hair are fine, but imagine a man with long hair who wants to wear earrings, or a skirt, or any of those things perceived feminine. It's so hard to step out of that box.
 
I thank you landsend for your openness and honesty. What you shared in post #100 is something I've seen also, about being seen as phobic if you don't agree - but on other issues rather than gender.
 
KenJ this forum feels like one of the few places I can be honest. Sharing my journey to understanding my gender identity here helps me understand the bigger picture & the views and opinions here are refreshing and not biased by trans or anti trans activism.

I do also still feel that a lot of gender dysphoria has roots in past lives. Whether or not that influences the biological make up, much in the same way past life wounds become birthmarks, remains to be seen. It would be very interesting to gather a body of different peoples (trans people and non trans?) experiences of gender dysphoria w/ past life memories and see how they compare and the impact on the current life.
 
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It would be very interesting to gather a body of different peoples (trans people and non trans?) experiences of gender dysphoria w/ past life memories and see how they compare and the impact on the current life.

I don't know if this has been posted already somewhere in the forum, but Dr. Jim Tucker has recently published a scientific study about past life memories and children with gender dysphoria: https://www.tandfonline.com/doi/abs/10.1080/19317611.2018.1523266

Objectives: This study examines childhood gender nonconformity (GNC) in conjunction with the phenomenon in which young children describe memories of a purported previous life. Methods: In a case-control study of 469 children reporting past-life memories, we used logistic regression to examine predictors of GNC, measured by documented gender nonconforming behaviors. Results: Children who remembered a life involving a different natal sex were much more likely to exhibit GNC than children who remembered a same-sex life. Conclusions: After exploring potential explanations, we conclude that past-life memories represent a novel factor that may be associated with the development of GNC.

And regarding trans activism, I am an involuntary witness of some feminist posts in my Facebook, and I often see how they lack an important piece of judgment to determine the origin of gender dysphoria and how it really can affect some people. Unfortunately, it seems many keep seeing it as a mere whim rather than a real identification with the other sex, and they often talk of gender identity and sexual orientation as if they were the same. I've often wished to show them Tucker's study, but they would probably dismiss it and label me as insane... :rolleyes:
 
I don't know if this has been posted already somewhere in the forum, but Dr. Jim Tucker has recently published a scientific study about past life memories and children with gender dysphoria: https://www.tandfonline.com/doi/abs/10.1080/19317611.2018.1523266



And regarding trans activism, I am an involuntary witness of some feminist posts in my Facebook, and I often see how they lack an important piece of judgment to determine the origin of gender dysphoria and how it really can affect some people. Unfortunately, it seems many keep seeing it as a mere whim rather than a real identification with the other sex, and they often talk of gender identity and sexual orientation as if they were the same. I've often wished to show them Tucker's study, but they would probably dismiss it and label me as insane... :rolleyes:

Thank you for sharing this! I will take a good look... I have read about some of Dr. Ian Stevenson’s documented cases of gender dysphoria (which is incidentally where I first heard and learnt about the term ‘gender dysphoria’)

I know Jim Tucker is Ian Stevenson’s protege and he focuses on children’s memories of past lives, but considering a lot of gender non conforming behaviour starts in childhood that makes sense to me also.

As for the strong feminist opposition of transgender peoples — I’ve been reading into both sides of the arguments (very strong and emotional opinions on both sides). There does seem to be, at the moment, a strong movement amongst young girls who are suddenly exhibiting gender dysphoria (having never done previously in their lives). That’s obviously worrying for a lot of parents who don’t want their kids going through unnecessary invasive treatments only to regret them later in life. I know off hand of a girl who was the daughter of my uncles girlfriend who seems to be going through that, and also, my brother in law is a teacher and also knows of other girls in a similar position.

What is going on here? I know myself if I had been bought up in today’s generation I may have been similarly influenced and may have already transitioned. Is that truly the right answer?

My worry would be the same of those parents, that really if my child had never been strongly ‘male’ in anyway and then suddenly started feeling those feelings I’d want to explore all avenues before coming to the conclusion that medical intervention and living as the opposite sex was the only way to have a truly fulfilling life.

My middle daughter is gender non conforming to a degree and reminds me of myself so I’m expecting similar things when she becomes a teenager...

I’m examining my own gender dysphoria under a similar critical lense. I’m coming to the conclusion that I hate being gendered in anyway at all... I can’t escape it and resent it with every fibre of my being. I hate how most folks judge me based on how I look, how we have to fit roles. For instance, this year me and my husband will be building a hut at the end of my garden as a space for me to go write. I mention this to my neighbor, immediately they assume it’s a ‘man cave’ for my husband. Do I have to justify why I need a space away from my house because of my biological sex?
Madness.
 
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Anyone interested in further reading might want to check out Dr. Ian Stevenson's documented cases:

http://www.iisis.net/index.php?page=semkiw-reincarnation-past-lifes-lives-gender-change&hl=en_US

This particular case documented gender confusion in two consecutive lifetimes, which I found particularly interesting: http://www.iisis.net/index.php?page...e-physical-resemblance-gender-change&hl=en_US

Jaako had an unusual personality in that he enjoyed hobbies typically enjoyed by women. Though he liked male activities such as playing ice hockey, hunting and driving cars, he also enjoyed playing with dolls. Jaako liked to crochet, sew tablecloths and he was attracted to women’s clothing, which he would purchase for Iris.

Though Jaako was tall and thin, Iris noted that he tended to move in a feminine way. Despite these mannerisms and though he believed in reincarnation, Jaako never expressed a desire to be a woman.

Ian Stevenson noted that in 90 percent of his validated children's reincarnation cases, gender stays the same from one lifetime to another, which infers that a particular soul has a preferred gender. As we see, Jaako will reincarnate as a woman and it may be that his feminine traits reflect his soul's preference for female incarnations. It may also be that Jaako is soul who prefers to incarnate as male and female in an alternating fashion, thus experiencing the qualities of both sexes...

...As a child, Taru demonstrated a preference for play that is typical for boys. She played with toy soldiers and while doing so, she would wear a helmet and carry a toy gun. She asked her parents to buy her a real gun and a hockey stick, and she would pretend to drive a car. Recall that Jaako enjoyed hunting, playing hockey and driving cars.

Taru had a strong preference for boy’s clothing, in contrast to her stepsisters, who only liked feminine clothes. In playing with other children, she would never take the role of a girl, rather, she would insist, “I am a boy.” (8)

As an adult, Taru continued to demonstrate masculine dress by always wearing pants and never wearing make up.

Reincarnation & Gender Identity Problems in Two Lifetimes

Taru's identification with the male gender appears to reflect her prior incarnation as Jaako, who conversely demonstrated feminine traits. This case shows how reincarnation can explain gender identity problems.
 
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