13 yr old Christian terrified of the dark? (Holocaust/Anne Frank)

Discussion in 'Reincarnation, Religion and Spirituality' started by 2017account, Jun 7, 2017.

  1. 2017account

    2017account New Member

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    I don't want to use my real name in this case as I don't feel comfortable doing so, so just call me "John".

    My name is John, and I am 13 years old born in a Christian family. I don't really remember a past life at all. Although, one dream I had when younger struck out to me. If you want, I can go into detail but I wanna get on topic.

    I used to go to sleep perfectly and all. Recently in my English class, we've been learning about the Holocaust. I've only read Number the Stars in elementary school, and I barely remember it.

    Because of that, this is my first real chance to learn about it. However, in class, we're focusing a lot more on Anne Frank. We just finished reading the transcript of "The Diary of Anne Frank", and before that we had to do a project studying a part of World War II. I was going to research concentration camps, but I have very poor work habits, and the school year is done in 1-2 weeks. I've also been reading "Hitler Youth: Growing up Under Hitler's Shadow" for another project related to this.

    Since the 4th or 5th grade, I've been studying Astrology. I started by learning about my horoscope, Libra, and I've come a LONG way from that. Last year in spring 2016, I took out astrology books from my library for a short period of time before my father found out I was studying it, and banned me from it. However, I've decided to continue online.

    Below the astrology section was the reincarnation books. I'm sure at least most of you know who Sylvia Browne is? I heard she's a joke in this type of category. I started studying reincarnation by reading some of her books that talked about the Other Side, and how we plan our lives and learn lessons from it. It was very interesting, but also very scary.

    I've already been studying karmic astrology for a while. I was very interested in Anne Frank's horoscope. I was doing some research in which then I came upon a story of Barbro Karlen being Anne? I did look around here, and I saw some other user here claimed to be here.

    As Anne's life (and the Holocaust itself) was very depressing, I feel miserable, and yet I'd want to learn more about her life. The fact that I feel this way made me paralyzed.

    This all happened near Memorial Day Weekend. For the first two days, I felt I couldn't sleep anymore. I would hide under my blanket, and feel like I'm in this warp of nothingness, uncertainty. I feel trapped.

    Starting a week ago, I tried to make things better by bringing out my alarm clock radio and listen to the Christian radio station. I've been staying up later than usual listening and writing down songs that I could listen to one day maybe on YouTube. Then, I would have to turn off the lights and just think about normal stuff.

    The dark feels very negative to me, although I doubt there's some spirit looking at me. I never even had a problem with the dark and sleeping at all until this happened. I keep thinking to myself it's all my imagination. Sometimes I think about some spirit like Anne Frank watching me from my bed, even though I already know about the Barbro case.

    Today, I woke up close to morning, and tried to ease off my mind with the radio station. I was hiding under my blanket, and it started to get brighter in my room as morning approached, and I was still scared. However, my family started waking up and starting our day, and then i felt comfortable and all. I share a room with my eldest sister who is staying for a while and completing her RN problem. She works overnight, leaving me alone in the room. Although, she takes day off, and she might be with me tomorrow on Thursday.

    But for today, I have to go through it again. All I want is for someone to be in the room and sleep so I won't have to feel dead. It feels like Hell kinda, but using darkness as torture.

    I feel best when I'm at school and all, in the daytime. I dread coming home now. Today, we were taking a test on the play but I didn't finish.

    All I'm asking is some advice? Some support? If you have any questions, I'll try to answer them as best as I can. I really wish someone would reply right now. I hate this so much.
     
  2. KenJ

    KenJ Moderator Staff Member Super Moderator

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    Welcome "John", what is it you hate the most? Darkness? Death? The unknown? Your uncertainty? Being alone? Reincarnation? Questioning your religious background?
     
  3. 2017account

    2017account New Member

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    Hi there Ken.

    I just calmed down doing other things. I just hate the darkness. Even though I study reincarnation, I feel like as if some negative spirits might be lurking around? I know it isn't but, my imagination goes crazy. I don't see it with my eyes. Just scary images of some spirit watching me in bed. Just like...a negative force when it's dark in my room at right.

    Very negative. Like a boogeyman who's waiting to come out and reveal himself and scare the living daylights of me.
     
  4. KenJ

    KenJ Moderator Staff Member Super Moderator

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    Yes, scary - and the more you think about it, the worse it gets! there is a lesson there, as Deborah says - "Energy follows Attention", or as I have said in the past, Your life is simply the sum of the things you attend to (pay attention to).
     
  5. Cryscat

    Cryscat Senior Member

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    Reading Psalm 23 before you go to bed might be comforting.

    Thanks for posting!
     
  6. 2017account

    2017account New Member

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    Alright, Thanks.

    I feel a lot more calmer, and it felt good to ask here for help. Really, the less I think about it, the better. But the more I do, the worse. It's emotionally a heavy topic for me, but I'd stick with it until the end of the school year, which is in about a week so.

    Wow, even doing astrology gives me the creeps because of this situation. Not to bother you, but I only saw one post on karmic astrology here. Is there any astrologers on this forum? If so, may you let me know? Thanks.
     
  7. Mere Dreamer

    Mere Dreamer Moderator Staff Member Super Moderator

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    Something important to understand about spiritual research is that the tools are only tokens. They only work in tune with your guidance, and you will find guidance of the type you permit to influence you. If you read up on demons and fear-based thinking, you will become afraid and vulnerable. If you read up on guardian angels, guides, improving yourself, facing fear with love, the light, etc. then you will be focusing on things that strengthen you and make the ugly side of spiritual seeking less invasive.

    Start by facing yourself in the mirror. Who are you? Whatever you don't understand about yourself is something that will make you a little fearful. Maybe you're afraid of rejection, loneliness, losing what you love, etc. These fears can take shape in your subconscious as "demons" and terrify you with the what if scenarios that you dread. Or, you can think about what you're grateful for, your strengths, the growth you've seen in your life over the past year, the people who love you, the fact that you are more than just the face in the mirror, etc. And you will find that these thoughts act as shields against the fear.

    The Bible repeatedly suggests that love is the weapon to use against fear. Your thoughts direct your experience of life, so think on whatever things are good, honest, just, of good report, ... basically anything of the light. This is not only Bible verses or whatever doctrinal stance your church preaches, by the way. The light can be found everywhere because people have seen the truth of it in all contexts around the world.

    Finally, remember that you get to choose who guides you, who influences your subconscious, who directs your attention. Anyone (books or church leaders) who points you to fear first is suspect. Anyone who shows you how to stand firm in hope even when the answers aren't clear, ask good questions, and focus on integrity and genuine compassion, respect, and love is someone whose teaching is at least basically worth listening to.

    Something I did for years when the darkness intimidated me was to create a specific space in my mind where only God's messengers and I were permitted. I called it the hands of God and spent a lot of time shrinking myself down and sleeping on his palm or tucked into his front pocket by his heart.

    Now I know that the darkness isn't a threat, but rather the fear comes out of my own heart and focus. If I am manipulating others even to protect myself, trying to harm anyone, lying to myself or acting against my integrity (even to please spiritual leaders who want me to follow their truth above what Spirit has told me), or thinking the worst of others and constantly finding fault with life ... then I create the demons that haunt me at night. By investing my mind in darkness I put myself on the level of darkness and it can reach me.

    By investing myself in honesty at least with myself (even if I keep it a secret from those who won't understand), seeking truth even if it means I have to change my foundation for life, clinging to the light, loving others, etc. I put myself on the level of the angels and the night becomes an opportunity for insight instead of fear.

    Learn to focus on things like gratitude. Listing the things you're thankful for is an excellent way to push back fear. Or you can use your imagination as a tool for good instead of letting it be ruled by fear. Imagine the love you have been given by your source of life to share with others like a stream flowing up from inside you. You can take that love and turn it into a shield around you against evil. You can turn it into threads of light and imagine connecting it to the people you want to encourage, help or support (expecting it will give them courage, hope, or a sense that they're not alone). You can use it to fill your home and push everything negative out of your space. You can even let that love burn through the bitterness, selfishness, and false beliefs that want to trap you. Make no mistake, love also destroys what can harm you, and sometimes that feels like a huge loss. I'm sure you get the picture, though.

    Your imagination is a tool. Use it to create fear and it will cooperate. Use it to create love and courage and it will be just as creative and helpful with that project, too.

    Remember, above all. You are never alone. You have guidance, and not just distant things like stars marking your life path. Start with Jesus and the angels and ask them to check everything and everyone you think of allowing to influence you. Look for small signs like seeing repeat numbers or a specific object that has spiritual meaning for you to remind you that you're protected. Over time you'll begin to sense the difference between a warning and a suggestion to go for a new opportunity or idea.

    True Spirit doesn't rule you or threaten you. What it does is create a laboratory out of life where you get to put things together, experiment, and see what happens. You always have a choice whether to listen or not. There may be a warning, but nobody will force you to take the wiser path and they'll always be ready to help you straighten things out when you get all tangled up.

    Nobody is standing over you, waiting to hit you with hellfire, okay? That's fear-based control systems, designed by humans who want power. Don't stay down on that level and those beliefs and fears won't be able to control your experience of life. Use common sense. Some things are nearly always destructive or fear-enhancing, like using the ouija board or trying to use magic to control or harm others. Those experiments (and the attitudes people invest in them) come back to bite you really fast.

    Other things, like meditation or reading the stars will help you ... or not depending on who you're connecting to. Choose your guides carefully.

    Be the kind of person you wouldn't mind meeting while feeling vulnerable in the dark of night, and you'll be the light that burns away the darkness you fear. Until then, count on the brightest light you trust just now, whether it's an angel, Jesus, a historic figure, or a relative who always protected you before they died. Choose someone who is a clear, shining symbol of the light you intend to become and focus there when you're in the dark.
     
    Last edited: Jun 8, 2017
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  8. KenJ

    KenJ Moderator Staff Member Super Moderator

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    That was beautifully stated MD, I wish that I had been able to have expressed it that clearly. Your background and mine, or our personality types, must be different because of the way we dealt with those things in our youth, but the result is the same.

    Edit: I checked your profile, I think it is both our personality type and background.
     
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  9. Eevee

    Eevee Administrator/Archivist

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    What a beautiful post, MereDreamer! 'John', I think MD has given you excellent advice and several exercises to deal with your fears. I hope you try them out and I am sure one of them will be just what you need.
     
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  10. 2017account

    2017account New Member

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    That was a very awesome post, MD. So what're you saying is to not think negatively, and try to have positive influences like God?

    Like I said, the less I think about it, the better. The fear was almost gone yesterday night as I was just about normal stuff. It'll probably take a week or two to finally get it off my mind. It's just very faint now, and it only strengthen if I think more about it. I don't feel really controlled by it, as it is almost gone. Thank you so much. I'd thought this would be the right place to come for help.
     
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  11. Cryscat

    Cryscat Senior Member

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    Wonderful post Mere Dreamer! Yes, 2017Account aka "John." in simple terms, "Energy goes where attention flows." Whatever you pay attention to, will be reflected in your life. If you focus on darkness and negativity, that's is what will show up in your life. Focus on the opposite, and that will show up in your life.

    I'd like to give you a pat on the back. Not many people your age would think to ask for help from older people. I hope all of this helps you out.
     
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  12. 2017account

    2017account New Member

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    Thank you, Cryscat. I've been able to sleep a lot better now that I've been doing other stuff. I felt well enough to come back to this forum, and do my usual lurking. I'm so fascinated about the Anne/Barbro case, but knowing what Anne went through just gets me emotionally overwhelmed. It just creeps me out.

    Have you heard of the Anne/Barbro case? It's really fascinating.
     
  13. Mere Dreamer

    Mere Dreamer Moderator Staff Member Super Moderator

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    I had a unique childhood, for sure. Unless your parents were missionaries or you grew up in a mission boarding school in a 3rd world country any overlap is likely the universal experiences of childhood.

    Thank you. Remember that God's conscious awareness is the substance that allows reality to exist, so there is a lot of good to be found in the universe. It's not just going to be spiritual things. Things that can help are as simple as appreciating your body's flexibility and athletic potential, or studying plants and animals and how they live and grow, or just exploring nature. Even creating art and using your imagination can be a huge positive element in your life if you choose to make it so. Have fun experimenting.

    I'm glad you're feeling better!
     
  14. autumnleavesnnovember

    autumnleavesnnovember Active Member

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    Personally, John, I think you are too young to be immersing yourself in the Holocaust. It devastated me when I studied it and I was in my early 20s! No one has an obligation to read a lot about historical happenings, if doing so deeply disturbs them psychologically. The topic of reincarnated Holocaust souls is a safer way to look at the topic, but it still can give you nightmares. In regards to Barbro Karlen, I remember reading about her years ago, and I was not convinced she was Anne Frank.

    P.S. Oops . . . hold on . . . who I read about years ago was not Barbro Karlen. I'll have to read up on her and see what I think. Thanks for mentioning her--a new possible reincarnation story!

    P.P.S. Oops again . . .she is the person I read about years ago, and I don't find her story convincing.
     
    Last edited: Jun 22, 2017
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  15. 2017account

    2017account New Member

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    Not convinced? Your serious, right? I mean, she sounded belivable as she had a lot of past life phobias, and even recognized people from her past life. Are you sure though?

    Yeah, if I ever decide to come back to study the Holocaust, maybe I'll look into the reincarnated souls. I read a post here saying austitic children are reincarnated Holocaust victims?

    Knowing what happened to the Frank family and others in the Holocaust scarred me at bedtime. Although, I've read a book on her life before the Holocaust, and it just makes me happy to me that she lived a normal life. The Frank family just kinda seems like this distant neighborhood family, I don't know.

    As of my current condition, I've come back to normal. However, I get uncomfortable with the darkness, especially when I'm in my own room trying to sleep. I try not to focus on my room a lot during dark, and I found myself staying up late having fun listening to the radio, which made me forget about it and happy.

    But then again, are you sure you're not convinced? I'd like to hear more if you could.
     
  16. autumnleavesnnovember

    autumnleavesnnovember Active Member

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    2017Account, I'm afraid I find your fierce belief in Barbro Karlen's story highly suspicious. Why would a 13 year old boy be so defensive about the story?

    No, I don't think she was Anne Frank in a past life, but a person who needs to believe she was famous in a past life, since she was not famous in this lifetime. Lots of people could take their feelings about being victims of the Holocaust and imagine they were Anne Frank. Anne Frank wasn't the only teenager who kept a diary of the time period either.

    Yes, I do believe many autistic children were probably Holocaust victims, or victims of other horrid events. Someone started a terrific thread on that here, someone who really devoted a lot of time thinking about the matter. (And I'm sorry I don't have the time right now to find that thread; but to the member who started it, you did a magnificent job of thinking it all out!)

    Yet I also believe some autistic children were artistic individuals in a past life who killed themselves, and may be simply refusing to live fully in their current lifetime, because they didn't want to come back in the first place. Maybe they killed themselves in their past life because they were not becoming the famous artists or writers or musicians they hoped to be. Fame is like a drug to many individuals. If they don't get it, they don't want to continue living. Or they sometimes create past life stories where they were famous, and try to get others to believe those fantasies. Who could, without a doubt, prove they weren't famous?
     
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  17. 2017account

    2017account New Member

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    Oh, I see what you mean. There is another person claimed to be Anne Frank. It's this inactive user, Shiro I think? Also, good insight on autistic children. I have no idea of a PL what-so-ever, and I do wonder how people like to incarnate into famous people (think popular artists and actors/actresses in our world today).

    The reason I believed in it was because there seemed to be a lot of evidence to back her up, but I do consider what you said. If it's false, then what are those memories children get when they first remember their PL at an early age as Barbro wanted her parents to call her Anne around age 2-3.
     
  18. autumnleavesnnovember

    autumnleavesnnovember Active Member

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    Well, who is describing those early childhood memories? The person who is claiming to be famous in a past life? Family members of that person? You can't believe everything you read. Maybe she did ask to be called "Anne" as a young child; maybe because she was called "Anne" in a past life, although that does not mean she was Anne Frank; or maybe she heard the name "Anne" on TV, or was read a story about an "Anne"; or met a child named "Anne", and simply liked the name better than Barbro. It's not unusual at all for a young child to ask to be called by another name. However, if you think Barbro Karlen's story has enough "proof" to convince you she was Anne Frank, then you should believe it. I didn't think there was enough proof when I read it.
     
  19. 2017account

    2017account New Member

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    Oh, well that could be it. Have you ever read believable or interesting accounts on PLs here?
     
  20. 2017account

    2017account New Member

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    Oh, and also, sorry if I sounded pushy. I was just a bit curious about your answer.
     

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