Attempted Regression produced results

Discussion in 'Past Life Memories' started by Dylan-JERC, Nov 4, 2018.

  1. Dylan-JERC

    Dylan-JERC Member

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    A few nights ago after speaking with a member here about some strange occurrences I was recommended to attempt a regression, so for the last 24 hours I have been attempting to do so since my conversation with Briski ended; now I feel the need to reiterate I am still a skeptic but after the events of last night before bed and now after waking up. It's 8:44 AM where I live, at the time I am writing this; that being the West Coast of Canada. Now take all of what I'm saying here with a grain of salt, as I imagine anyone with an analytical mind and skeptic view would do anyway as I personally cannot place much weight behind what I'm saying now. It makes me feel absolutely insane to even entertain the idea but there's that old saying "No one else can say what you saw but you."

    The first night of trying produced little in the way of progress, just anxieties, nausea and the shakes. I feel that might've put a barrier up though every time I tried to dig into the dark corners of my psyche those feelings would escalate and I'd be wrought with a series of untraceable emotions; why I say untraceable is they'd come and go as quickly as I could experience them. This continued well into the early hours of the morning until I finally went to sleep, it was a dreamless sleep but I felt disconnected; like I wasn't fully asleep when I was. The following day was uneventful, though after waking up I didn't feel rested at all and every action was heavy. Tastes were blunted, scents were muddled. I chocked it up as just the rainy weather messing with me and ignored it. Around 8 PM last night, after my cutesies with my S/O sending her off to bed I laid down and tried to regress once again; however this time I didn't feel anxious but at the same time I didn't feel at peace. I felt I was treading a fine line between what I'm allowed to do and what I'm not but I didn't care, placing ear buds in my ears I played some beta waves that I found here on this site off a post about someone needing help regressing it. For the first twenty minutes I felt nothing but whacko, laughed at myself for even entertaining the idea but I couldn't bring myself to remove the ear buds.

    Thirty minutes in, I fell closer to sleep at this point I probably should've removed the ear buds and gone on my way to dreamland but I felt strangely heavy and movement came with difficulty, assuming this was regular exhaustion I just ignored it. Though not long after brushing it off and forcing myself to relax and embrace "sleep", which is what I later learned it was not.

    The flashes were vague, hardly flashes at all. The things that appeared behind closed eyelids were ethereal almost, completely see through and hard to make out and if I focused on them they'd fade. I saw what appeared to be triangular symbols, faces, they came fast and went away just as quickly; seemingly flying out of the corners of my peripheral vision as if I were passing them. I saw men laughing, a woman smiling but the thing that always came back was the handshake; it came back so frequently I could follow the wrinkles and curvature of the finger and I can safely say I could probably draw an exact replica of what is in my head it's burned in so clear. Then I was drawn back to a field, that played a part in my first anxious experience. This time however, I realized where it was from. A long time ago, when I was very young perhaps around six, a year before my car accident which is what might've forced that memory into the recesses of my mind; either way; around this time I had a dream. I thought it was in a house but it was in the field, I was standing over someone from behind; they wore darkish grey overalls and a white shirt; polished black shoes and had messy chocolate hair. What's strange is I want to call him Wilhelm, compulsively; like I'm sure that is what he was called. He was toiling away on what looked like a Diesel engine, it was very large and whatever it was attached to it was attached at the back; it stunk fiercely and gave this oily taste in my mouth and made my face feel heavy like it was covered in goo. (keep in mind as I'm remembering this I'm almost experiencing the dream all over again in this state) Wilhelm didn't look back at me I just stood there over top of him and watched, arms crossed. I was dressed in the same but I had something slung over my shoulder and the knees on my pants were dirty and worn. The field itself was vast, I can't tell you what was to my left; I can't but to my right there were dense, tall trees that were many shades darker green than the lush and vibrant grass; fog hugged the treeline and made the already abyss like blackness of the forest seem endless. The field itself was strange, more like a clearing really than a field and now as I type that I think that's exactly what it was. A man made clearing.

    Something said whatever was wrong with the diesel was my fault but I can't tell you what I had done or what said engine was even attached to, which is strange; you'd think if I was the one that damaged it or whatever I'd know what it was on? Apparently not though but I digress. Advancing a few minutes into the dream, Wilhelm quickly looked over his shoulder to stare at me, I couldn't see his face; only his eyes were visible under his chocolate mop as his shoulder hid his nose down from sight; I felt confused, his eyes were huge; like a cats is when you use a laser pointer as if he were terrified and then out of no where, blackness, the memory of the dream was gone. Boom. I felt blown away, literally the definition of the word; like I was flying backward before slowly beginning to float upwards and something in my gut said "blown away" was right, as something kept saying I was blown up.

    I came to and ripped the headphones out of my ears, had a small anxiety attack like I actually was just blown up and it took me about twenty minutes to calm down. I talked with a friend about this in great detail as he also believes in Reincarnation (but puts as much faith in it as I do, being utterly skeptic at the same time as belief) but he suggested it was either a bombing or mortar/artillery round potentially and perhaps the field was in Germany somewhere (the friend in question is Belgian and lives in Belgium) citing the trees there in places are leagues darker than the grass and it's the same in a few countries surrounding Germany too but not as vast. That sounded "right" to me, like he spoke fact not a suggestion and so I'm going to roll with it's a field somewhere in Germany. Back onto the topic of bombing or artillery, something in my heart said the bombing happened before the dream and what I 'saw' happened a while after.

    After calming down and going to sleep, I had a dream. In this dream, I was in the field again but it was different. There was no diesel engine or Wilhelm, it was me and five other men. Their faces were black holes wearing dark grey helmets and hats, attached at the neck and wearing equally dark grey attire with black strips going up either side of their chest, those strips disappearing at where I would assume the belt line was as if hidden by something. In this dream I felt angry, hateful and we were dragging men out of strange homes by their collars, wrists, ankles.. Anything we could grab and pull that wouldn't be easily gotten away from and if anyone of these men struggled, two or three of us would begin bashing them with the butt of some kind of gun before continuing to drag them along. Something told me I wasn't angry with the men I was hurting, I was angry at myself and the men who were helping me. I hated them. I hated them all. I hated what I was doing and I hated myself too for doing it. We pulled the men along, at times for what felt like minutes and pushed/packed them all tightly together to the point some were finding it difficult to stand easily or perhaps they already were having difficulty standing from the prior beatings. The men I hated got in line on either side of me, two to a shoulder and raised those very same strange guns on the corralled men. I'll never forget the haunting feeling of watching those black faceless ******* holes and knowing they were looking back at you. It didn't feel like I dream I could physically feel their nonexistent eyes on me and I was the last to raise the same gun as them. I could tell they were waiting for me, waiting for something involving me anyway.

    I'll never forget what happened next, it was like wearing an Oculus rift but realistic to the core. I felt myself pull the trigger, I felt the rattle in my forearms and shoulders, it hurt, I saw the flashes; hell, I even heard the gun. It was ungodly fast, it spat lead like a demon and the guttural snarl it made is making me want to throw up even thinking about it now. I saw the blood and visceral, I saw it all, the spray from them as they fell backward.. What was strange is they didn't hit the ground, they kept falling like they were going off a cliff or into a black hole but it was a field. I could see the grass behind them but it was almost like they were falling through the ground..

    That's all I have, I woke up not long after and I came right here; right here immediately. It's now 9:30 AM as I finish writing this.

    *PS Whoever added the tags, thank you very much. I wasn't aware I had to add them.
     
    Last edited: Nov 4, 2018
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  2. briski

    briski Senior Registered

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    Sounds like you got a lot more than the other time, it may open up more now
     
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  3. KenJ

    KenJ Moderator Staff Member Super Moderator

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    Welcome to the forum Dylan, your description of what you experienced was well written and I was easily drawn into it, thank you for posting it.
     
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  4. Dylan-JERC

    Dylan-JERC Member

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    I realize now why the face I saw the first time hated me Briski, he didn't hate me, persay, he hated "me" if that makes sense. He hated himself and so me by proxy, thus the feeling of hatred.
     
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  5. baro-san

    baro-san Senior Member

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    I believe you didn't mention to have been aware of your current personality during your experience, so I assume you were fully immersed, as when you're dreaming.

    Your account of your dream made me feel like reading a novel: the turn of phrase, the image creating descriptions. I'm also impressed with the high quality of your remembering of the content of your dream.

    Part of regressing is to take control of the experience, to move up or down the timeline.

    PS: Lovely little dog!
     
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  6. Dylan-JERC

    Dylan-JERC Member

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    It's hard to say, it was me but it wasn't me. I was aware but at the same time in darkness. If that makes sense.
     
  7. Dylan-JERC

    Dylan-JERC Member

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    I'm going to try more tonight.
     
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  8. tanker

    tanker Senior Registered

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    Welcome, Dylan, I found your post very interesting. Could well be Germany, the image of the vast field and the darkness of the forest almost made me nostalgic. I don't know what to make of the rest. The 'firing squad' image is disturbing. See what you come up with next time.
     
  9. SeaAndSky

    SeaAndSky Senior Registered

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    Hi Dylan,

    This is a very interesting post. I am initially curious about a couple of things, and anyone else can feel free to chime in if they know the relevant locations on the board:

    (1) It sounds like you had an earlier post before your regression where you mentioned some of the same things--I would be curious to read that one as well. So, a link or location (thread) where I can find that would be appreciated.

    (2) You mention a spot on this site where there is a link to a Beta wave source that you used. I would also appreciate a link to what you are talking about there (i.e., location on the board, etc.). BTW--I was interested to find that you used Beta waves, since those are usually associated with waking consciousness. I'm wondering whether Beta input during what would normally be a sleep cycle produced these strong results for you. I think people usually go for Alpha or Theta.

    Once again, a very interesting post.

    Cordially,
    S&S
     
  10. tanker

    tanker Senior Registered

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    There's a Theta Wave video which Landsend kindly posted. Just put Theta Wave in the 'search' box and you'll see it.
     
  11. Dylan-JERC

    Dylan-JERC Member

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    Beta wave.. Theta wave.. I don't know the difference but it was on a post involving Tanker and Landsend so I guess it's theta wave and I deleted the first post I'm afraid as I didn't like it there with no context and lack of information. I'm sure Briski might remember some of my initial jumble and ramblings. That was a day almost before my experience written here.
     
    Last edited: Nov 6, 2018
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  12. Dylan-JERC

    Dylan-JERC Member

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    It's 12:04 AM, I just woke up and I had another odd dream; as the last time I'm typing this out while it's still fresh. I went to sleep around 7:30 PM last night and somewhere in between I was woken by nature; once the rain stopped and I made my way back to bed I began to dwell on an earlier conversation I had with another good friend of mine, which ended with him coming and checking out this forum as we discussed a dream he had growing up. Through our poking around and looking at pictures we learned he very well might've been a WW1 Soldier who fought at the battle of Passchendaele; reinforced to me anyway by the fact after I came across a photo that was recolored authentically, I hadn't shown it to him yet but I got him to describe to me the colors of the trees; what they looked like, what color the dryer muck was, the water, the actual muck. He got every color to the key and when I showed him the photo he got extremely anxious and more started coming back to him the longer he talked about the dream. It's his tale to tell though and I'm getting off topic.

    This conversation caused me to dwell further on my own strange memories and dreams, such as the ones I listed in my earlier post and the thoughts stayed with me all the way to sleep. Somewhere after I actually achieved just that, I began to dream. It wasn't the field this time but a town, or at least what I'd imagine a town would be. We were in France, I could tell by the style of the houses and color found in the square, the weather was awful that day; the clouds had blown over and darkened the sky and when the rain began to dribble it made an already dreary day drearier. The French flag had been cut from where it hung on an official looking building and I could see it burning on a pyre consisting of corpses, broken furniture and other random assortment of things; spurred on by the splashing of gasoline done by a very young man, maybe no older than eighteen. He was dressed rigidly in the uniform of the Wehrmacht, as were the handful of other men standing around going about their business, generally seeming upbeat and jovial. I stood on a balcony of some sort I think because I was looking down on all of this and I could see a few of the tiled roofs, the smoke from the flag and bodies wafting up to form a nightmarish cloud of black of ash and soot that hung low in the sky and didn't seem to climb upward very quick at all; it was more a slow crawl as it expanded out. I imagine from a distance it would've been as easy to spot as a boulder five feet away from you with how dense it was and oddly it didn't stink terribly, it smelled like gasoline, burning cloth and barbecue. I continued to stare for a moment before something drew my eyes away, in my ears it sounded like an echo at first and I didn't react, just a hollow voice ringing through my ears however when it came back I swear it almost jarred me from sleep, as though it was right in my ear and I could feel my eyelids tense in the waking world but I was anchored firmly now and I didn't want to leave yet. Again it returned, it was excited and singular. It sounded like Hopman, I heard this before too in one of my earlier dreams and assuming this to potentially be my old name if all this is real, I deliberately left it out but after asking my previously aforementioned buddy about it he said it was a rank of some kind, Captain or Lieutenant maybe and when I googled it (mind you I don't look at google translations as they tend to be wrong) I learned it was actually spelled Hauptmann; which according to the Wiki was a Captain in the Wehrmacht. He spoke some jibberish at me I didn't understand when I finally turned, I felt tense and tight; I was a foot taller than this man and he wore those same dark grey overalls from before and a white shirt but it wasn't Wilhelm, it was someone I don't know though everything he said which made no sense to me got stuck in my head, unfortunately I can't recreate what it sounded like in spelling but I might record myself saying it just to show you. He then stamped his foot on the ground, heels together and gave me a four finger salute before trouncing off.

    After he left I began taking note of what was in the room with me, there was a very expensive looking desk to my left that had what I could only describe as bullet holes riddled through the flat front of it, whilst the surface area itself was spotless and smooth as the day it was made and it looked as though the drawers were in tact; there were papers strewn all over it though I couldn't see what was on them. There was also a very ornate looking glass ink well filled to the brim with the cap off on the right corner of the working area, with an equally decorative fountain pen resting beside it. There was a stack of letters there as well, bundled together so tight they were bending in the middle as if to fold like a roll of paper money. The floor was glazed wood and the walls were made of bricks, there was a marble hearth by the door with a love seat in front of it; the seat had the exposed wood acting as armrests and what little cushioning it did have looked to be velvet; though there was a large stain on the furthest cushion from me that bled onto the back of the love seat. For some reason I felt repulsed and couldn't stare long, instead my eyes were drawn to an old yew book case, it was large but damaged and certain shelves had caved and broken, causing the books resting on them to spill and fall around it; there was an ornament there that had fallen on its side from what I can only guess was what caused the damage to the shelves too and I was transfixed, I felt myself going toward it and I heard my boots thumping on the wood. Thump, thump, thump. Each step was a solid rhythm, well practiced and utilized; I reached out but instead of my arm I saw a dark grey sleeve with a black leather glove; this didn't concern me however all I wanted was the ornament, I had a mission. It got closer and closer, I don't know why I wanted it so bad or why it felt so far when it should've only been a few steps away yet here I was walking a marathon for it; then my thoughts were shattered by an ear piercing whistle; it sounded like a woman shrieking and I mean screeching; if you can imagine what a banshee sounds like, that was it; the ground shook, I fell on my hands and knees; everything was shaking, the ink well spilled yet the shrieks kept coming and so did the tremors, I couldn't find my feet. There was loud yelling outside and crashing, the sounds of things collapsing and then it stopped; but the shouting from outside didn't. It was alert, alarmed, what I can assume was rapid gunfire quickly followed. I scrambled to my feet, my cap had fallen but I didn't care it didn't protect me from anything anyway. I used the book case for support and went to turn around, my heart was spasming and when I turned toward the direction I came from I saw eyes. Inches away from mine, floating eyes. They glared at me in that split second and then I woke up but for a whole minute after jarring from my sleep and shooting out of bed every time I blinked I'd see them again behind my eyelids, they were piercing green and made me feel afraid.

    That's all I got, I'm done with sleep now though and hopefully I have a quiet one tonight..

    I finish writing this at 1:05 AM.
     
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  13. tanker

    tanker Senior Registered

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    Dylan, thank you for sharing so much. That's a brilliant description, and just shows the value of writing down things the moment they've happened. Over time memory becomes less distinct, but you've captured it all so quickly it's still vivid. I'm waiting to hear your next dream. I'm curious to know what the ornament was that was so important to you. Can you describe it? Would your friend join us too and tell his story?
     
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  14. briski

    briski Senior Registered

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    Agreed I think your friend needs to join
     
  15. fireflydancing

    fireflydancing just a fly in the sky Staff Member Super Moderator

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