I've not really discussed my earlier incarnations. I've been avoiding discussing them for years. As a result I haven't examined the lessons I needed to learn from those lives. Because of this those lives still contain bite, the memories are more chaotic. They certainly fit into the historical narrative but what I mean is that I've learned since then. I remember the battles and I wonder why I felt compelled to fight. I know it was always about unity but my memories are jumbled up in wave after wave of battling and killing. Why did I have to fight in life after life? Sometimes I think that maybe I'm being too hard on my earlier incarnations. They are almost like a dirty little secret to me. I see much commonalities between my two earliest remembered incarnations and this wasn't completely lost to history as one can see from this link: https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Cogad_Gáedel_re_Gallaib I would really appreciate an objective view on my earlier incarnations so if anyone has any feedback it would be greatly appreciated. I'm sick of beating myself up for them. I'd like to know why I incarnated into those lives in the first place. What lessons was I to learn? The only thing I know is what I considered a righteous ideal or conflict gave me ambition. I thought that I could reshape the world and I didn't realise that I didn't even know that I had to reshape myself. From my modern perspective I see no justification for the battles I fought although I do know what I was thinking at the time. This topic could be really embarrassing to me because I will have to talk about my dreams, but maybe its time I journeyed into aspects of my personality that I've been reluctant to go.