Where and how do you find a past life regression therapist locally? Sorry in advance, this is another TL;DR post and probably TMI and the detail of this information may disturb some people with emotional problems or PTSD. ***Also trigger abuse warning.*** Also this thread is too long apparently I have to put half of it into a reply. I am inquiring about patterns in this life, especially regarding situations and tendencies that seem chaotic and disturbing. I've had a pattern of this life to be an outcast among peers my age, because of my autism diagnosis (although I think it goes deeper than that on some kind of spirit contract level, as well as people's negative influences)... And when I became an adult I have been attracting some messed up and tormenting situations... Several sociopathic predator types, online and IRL had me becoming more socially alienated from my peers due to the emotional abuse/isolation/abandonment... Due to these situations my peers actually for the most part avoided me, even making fun of me and calling me schizophrenic and mentally ill, even claiming that I was asking for these situations to happen to me. People also like my brother (who is an physically/emotionally abusive person I am forced to live with) hypocritically tell me I should own up to these choices and accept responsibility for asking for them...? I guess, maybe I did bring these situations on myself somehow, but I think other people were involved as well.... Believe me I have carried guilt about these situations and it weighed me down by keeping it all inside myself beating myself up for the choices I had made... Asking to be abused... Consequently and ironically after I was targeted by my first spath from a chatroom, involvement in a group of spaths in art college at a state university, I would describe them as a type of cult, highly likely they are Satanic. I believe the "leader" also may have put a black magic / demonic curse on me, having me dance around him like a puppet against other girls in a Black Swan scenario, the movie which he mentioned in his rants in class (people call me schizophrenic for claiming this, but they don't want to see or accept what happened because they're apaths and were part of the mob mentality that humiliated me and made me the scapegoat of their college's problems... Some even went after me, told me I was schizophrenic, and in love with the professor who put the curse on me.... Most people involved in the college today ignore me when I inquire them about the situation also..).... My parents and family had no idea this was happening to me because, it seemed they abandoned me and didn't care.... I also called them out on this... This scenario also got me into political corruption conspiracy theories, especially regarding political figures being involved in sex crime rings, and I believe this was a low level sex crime ring of sorts (kind of like the whole Weinstein situation in Hollywood). Possibly in a past life I was in some kind of cult and these people were my abusers then as well? And a deep desire to expose them now and reap justice...A deep hatred and burning anger towards the "leader".... But my focus on hating them with a burning fire has eaten me up inside, paralyzed and distracted me from the love I am looking for... The love I even found, believed I could manifest from my past life dream and lost.... Because I thought I was repeating this same kind of scenario with that guy (a chronic emotionally/sexually abusive predator in a superior position?)... Criticism, guilt, anxiety, abandonment and resentment behavior in my own family, and domestic violence mostly by my brother.... Which makes me want to run away, to find that companion who will love and accept me fully (and the vision of that protective healer companion is always that guy from my job, or likenesses of him, despite the unknown of the possible sexual predator aspect...)... Being on and off psychiatric medications long term since I was a child... And they were the gateway to me using and overdosing on harder drugs.... Lack of most practical life skills and activities a young person should have (activities like cooking, gardening, fishing, sports, self defense, involvement socially in clubs at school, etc) Lack of dating and contact with the opposite sex... Lack of romance/sex, love and companionship I always desired and longed for... And yes the one guy I desired in my heart, convinced this was a deep love from a past life, was a similar pattern to my past abusers (the unfair dynamic of the mentor/student or older/younger where I am groomed into being attached to this person and dependent on them due to my developmental delay and condition. A condition which my predators can see from a mile away and make me an easy target. I don't hate the guy for flirting and touching me, in face I love and miss him because he made me feel human again, which I realize is foolish. Because it was also an ironic scenario which left me wondering, if he was an abuser like those professors...)... Becoming emotionally fixated and deluded onto the wrong person which prevented me from finding a fulfilling and fair and equitable romance??? And yet I search for romance and none can be found... Because guys always give up on me, or the chemistry and energy is wrong, and all guys I have involved with are players or predators or creeps... This guy though, I think he was a standard I should keep because ideally he is loyal and monogamous, practical, sentimental and even tempered... It would be hard for me to believe he was like my abusers but maybe it is possible.