How much of this is just wishful thinking and self consolation?

Discussion in 'Reincarnation Questions' started by JustinTime, Jan 9, 2018.

  1. Jim78

    Jim78 Active Member

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    I never said all problems are equal. Being born with good looks isn't a sign of a charmed life. I was considered good looking when I was younger but I still ended up an all singing all dancing hobo. I also know of successful women who have the illusion of having everything who have had more hellish lives than I ever had. All I'm saying really is that you can never judge a book by its cover.
     
  2. KenJ

    KenJ Moderator Staff Member Super Moderator

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    Justin, No one, I repeat, No one is forcing you to be miserable! I would suggest that you use your vivid imagination in a more productive way than you are. You are in a rut, just as I was, you don't see why you are in your current position, just as I was, you feel beaten down, just as I was, you are angry, disillusioned, and see no way out of your predicament, been there, done that.

    Look at what you are doing, see where you are, imagine where you want to be (Irrespective of the position of others), and do something different. And, get that silly notion of fairness out of your head, the picture is much bigger than you think it is. To me, in terms of a painting like the Mona Lisa, you are complaining that there is too much dark colors, that you feel that the lighter colors are better and it is only fair that there should be more of them.

    As for whether or not I know about racial discrimination, no, not in the worst possible way, only for being accused of being a slave owner because of the color of my skin (and therefore racist somehow) and unable to get into a doctoral program because I was a white male.

    I recall,not long after being able to comprehend my disability, talking to a Social Worker who stated "The only thing that I would miss if I were in your condition would being unable to play the piano", I hope that I'm not that stupid sounding to you.

    As Deborah says Energy follows attention, and you need to understand that for your own well-being.

    Without the people at the bottom, middle, and top of one another there would be no totem pole, just bland totems having lost their meaning.
     
    Last edited: Jan 28, 2018
  3. JustinTime

    JustinTime Member

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    If you don't want someone to be miserable, give them good and comfortable conditions to begin with! You can't go around fooling yourself that a bad life or bad circumstances are somehow a gift. Every time I interact with people, every conversation, I'm being judged negatively and discriminated against due to circumstances outside my control. How can I not feel bad or miserable even if I tried? How? You're speaking from a position of comfort - it's easy to say "just don't feel miserable", but if you were treated like this just because of racial discrimination and other reasons you, or anyone else in the world, would not feel happy at all. All this "you are in control of your own destiny" just sounds like a bunch of excuses. Try telling the innocent kid who lost his limbs to bombs and are bullied in school by kids to "just not feel miserable".
     
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  4. Jim78

    Jim78 Active Member

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    Justin why are you so angry? People are just trying to help you see the positives. It seems to me your going to have to wallow in the negatives long enough to eventually search for hope. It's about changing your thinking, not trying to change everyone else. You won't find solace by seeking outside of yourself for validation. I should know, I've tried for years. Its like beating your head against a brick wall.
     
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  5. JustinTime

    JustinTime Member

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    I went to a top university, worked harder than 99% of the people in the world, am a generous person and have helped those who needed help my whole life, but I can't even get a job right now and everything in my life is going bad, I am the victim of racial discrimination wherever I go and nobody bats an eye or things about me. That's why I'm so angry. Do you know anything about my life? You don't know my life. Have you experienced all the pain I've experienced? Have you been me, for even one single day? I don't think so. I deserve better luck for everything I've put into life, and there are people all around who have not put in the hard work but are enjoying lives far better than me. Of course I'm angry. Put anyone in this situation and they would be angry. The people who aren't angry or those who are lazy and are easily complacent or those who have gotten more than they deserve in life for what they put in.
     
    Last edited by a moderator: Jan 30, 2018
  6. KenJ

    KenJ Moderator Staff Member Super Moderator

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    Justin, I truly wish that you get what you think is so much better than you have right now, just to see if you handle that any better. I think it would be a good idea to save your posts for a review later in your life so that you can understand where you where at this time in your life. It is undoubtedly difficult for you to see any advantage for experiencing what you are going through at this time, and unfortunately, no one can give you answers that will relieve your pain.

    If indeed you are in the top one-percent of the hardest working, freely giving, helpful person that you state that you are, there is something that you are obviously overlooking - I suspect it has something to do with attitude, but have no way of knowing for sure of course. What I do know, and seemingly not getting understood by you, is that your "life" will "be" the things that you focus upon - there is free-will - misery is a subjective experience, believe it or not. Energy does follow attention, when life gives you lemons, make lemonade, you seem unable or unwilling to move from where you see yourself, why is it so important to you to stay where you are with those feelings? What would you lose if you did not feel this way, what would you be giving up - think about it?

    Just curious, I'm interested in your college degree, does your major fit your primary aptitude on an Aptitude test? Are you pursuing something you really want to do, something you love?

    We can't fix your feelings about your life, but in terms of reincarnation and the forum guidelines, you have been given some valid suggestions and information - I don't know of much more that can be added. It seems that you might indeed be facing your life-lesson with your current issues.

    I wish you well in your journey.
     
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  7. SeaAndSky

    SeaAndSky Senior Registered

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    Hi Justin,

    First it was your parents, who didn't deserve to be rich, but kept getting richer, and had what you didn't have but wanted and deserved. Then it was all people who had things you didn't have but wanted and deserved. Then, excuse me if I'm having trouble keeping up or getting mixed up at this point, it was mean/undeserving people everywhere who had things you didn't have but wanted and deserved. All of the foregoing was mixed in with complaints about karma or God or fate or something not being fair. More recently you have started to cite some racial or ethnic basis for your failure to obtain what you want and believe you deserve. Excuse me if I haven't completely kept up, but I've had a lot of other things on my plate recently. Anyhow, maybe I'm mistaken, but I don't recall this ethnic/racial complaint coming up until recently. If this was the issue, why not put it in up front? Likewise, why has it not prevented your parents from enjoying their "undeserved" success? Are you adopted? I'm actually wondering about these things. It just seems strange to me that if this was prominent in your experience and the cause of your troubles you would not have said something about it before now.

    Cordially,
    S&S
     
  8. JustinTime

    JustinTime Member

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    KenJ, I know for a FACT that if I am lucky enough to become financially independent it would be the greatest life ever. I have an extremely strong work ethic and strong passion for my industry (that most others in this industry don't). I will be able to handle it so well, and would be a great compensation for the unlucky circumstances I've been given in life (I'm not going to explain this any more, because it's hard for others who aren't in the same context to understand). I could easily surpass the so-called "successes" of my parents. It would also make me more benevolent, to have experienced both failure and massive disappointment at the beginning of my life, but to culminate that with speculator success and achievement, which I undoubtedly worked for, and deserve. Wish me luck!
     
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  9. KenJ

    KenJ Moderator Staff Member Super Moderator

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    Good Luck
     
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  10. Tinkerman

    Tinkerman Administrator Staff Member

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    Bravo, Justin... and good luck!
     
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  11. Jim78

    Jim78 Active Member

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    Justin, your coming across to me with the attitude that you should be rewarded for doing good. If your doing good to be rewarded then your intentions are insincere. You would be helping others for selfish motives. I didn't go to a top university because people through my life went out of their way to keep me down. I could tell you my IQ or my life's history or whatever but I don't feel inclined to praise myself or broadcast my current life's past on the internet to any great degree.

    No I don't know your life and I haven't experienced your pain but you don't know anything about my suffering through my life. In my early twenties I used my tough childhood as an excuse to destroy myself. I blamed all of my life's ills on other people. Most of it was other peoples fault but I had to fight them all the way and perpetuate my own suffering. What I hadn't realised is that I'd now become a man. Whatever happened in my past, whomever had wronged me, I was now an adult and responsible for my own life. Don't assume that your the only one who had it bad.

    You keep saying I deserve, I deserve, I deserve. Nobody in this life owes you a living Justin. Even God doesn't owe you anything. We are all on this rock struggling together. Your only responsibility is to try to be the best man that you can be.

    Even if anyone would be angry in your situation that's irrelevant. Its about what you can do to help yourself. I'm sorry Justin, but I've been through too much myself and travelled too many roads to see your complaints as anything but nonsensical. You sound like a boy to me, not a man. I'm sorry but that's just how your coming across.
     
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  12. Jim78

    Jim78 Active Member

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    By the way...good luck Justin.
     
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  13. SeaAndSky

    SeaAndSky Senior Registered

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    Hi Justin,

    I'll join the chorus: Good Luck!

    Cordially,
    S&S

    PS--Don't forget your promise to be benevolent!
     

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