I think I had another recall

Discussion in 'Past Life Memories' started by KenJ, May 19, 2019.

  1. Totoro

    Totoro Super Moderator Staff Member Super Moderator

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    The photo stuck out to me as 1890's. I don't know why but that's the feeling I got from reading the thread.

    I feel I may be missing something, so please forgive me for asking, but Ken, what is your goal with talking about this with your family? Is there some concern from them, towards you in this regard?

    Are you saying that you are surprised that you don't have gender issues in this lifetime, because of your experience? I take it though that having the experience has made you uncomfortable.

    Given that the memories seem to be in the context of taking care of a child, that's what I would expect for someone who changed genders, when that was something they wouldn't normally do under "normal" circumstances. I think if we honestly looked at our loved ones, there isn't much we wouldn't be willing to do for them. Maybe it just suited that lifetime in particular for you to be female and you did it, simply out of love and there's not much more to it than that. Could it be your daughter was they boy in the memory? If so, it's highly likely you switched genders for her, as she did.

    Here's a case in point, my friend's (past life husband) mother committed suicide when he was young and in his later years, he deeply regretted not having had a mother. From what I can tell, based on my research, his father from that life, is now his mother in this one. He is single and lives with her, so I think that was the manifestation of his last wishes or unfinished business from that life.

    I agree with S&S, I do think we have an innate "gender" and for me, I seem to have an easy time switching even though I mostly feel female. I think my gender issues in this life come from wanting to help my wife in this life, when I should have been female again, to finish my unfinished business from my last life. There's a longing and frustration there, in feeling like I missed out. I think my lesson here is to be less selfless and to focus on my own emotional needs and healing first.

    If you read Newton's books he does give one the idea that gender swapping is to learn valuable lessons, but I don't think it necessarily be such a "guided" activity. It could just be as simple as an expression of love for another.

    While I'm not 100% sure about your feelings Ken, I would look at your actions as being those of a loving parent and to view yourself with compassion and kindness and without any judgement.
     
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  2. KenJ

    KenJ Assistant Archivist and Moderator Staff Member Super Moderator

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    This morning I awoke with my dogs beside me trembling because of the lightning and thunder that I could barely hear, not because it was distant, but because of my hearing (lack thereof). I was then greeted with the feeling of ‘completeness’, the understanding that "all is as it should be”, and the feeling of having both started the thing I was still alive to do and the fact that I had not included some of my family in my previous actions.

    I was aware of the fact that there was no such thing as an “Accident”, not that I believe in per-destination exactly, but that they are used for our stepping-stones to our accomplishing the understandings necessary for soul-growth as I’ve long suspected. I was aware of how things fit together, from the experiences in my life, the part my wonderful wives have played, my injury, and even Deborah’s somehow knowing to put me in the position here on this forum – truly a wondrous week so far.

    I feel naked and alone in the ‘deep-end’ of the of the pool with the water getting colder where the warm words I’ve heard here have been so helpful. As I slid from Believing into Knowing it was interesting to feel Firefly’s post change before my eyes as I read it, knowing it came from the same place as I now felt familiar with, the certainty.

    Today is the anniversary of sorts with a cherished friend as well as the last full day of my eightieth year. I am acutely aware that LOVE is ALL THERE IS and I truly feel that now more than ever before.

    My hopes are that my family members and others might open their minds enough to at least look into this reality that reincarnation is not a religion, but is something that is right in front of them and is expressed in writings by Brien Weiss, Carol Bowman, Ian Stevenson, Jenny Cockell, Michael Newton, and others Especially the book “Soul Survivor” by the Leiningers – at the very least to watch (listen to) Richard Martini’s videos.

    It was a welcome experience to find Steve Bowman’s Chapter 3 (it has disappeared! Here is a substitute.) that spoke of reincarnation once being in the Christian Bible and other readings - what I’d found with my more than a decade of research about it. I did more research in this area than I did for my PhD by the way which was mostly something to flatter my huge ego and feelings of insecurity after my injury.

    It would be really nice if a family member of mine would post something constructive in this thread, but that is perhaps way too much to ask.
     
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  3. KenJ

    KenJ Assistant Archivist and Moderator Staff Member Super Moderator

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    Totoro, I posted this morning before reading anything else. I hope that what I wrote answers your questions. It has/had nothing to do with my current gender having issues, just in response to PMs I'd received.
     
  4. landsend

    landsend Senior Registered

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    KenJ,

    Am very interested and glad to know you've experienced this for yourself. As you know, one thing is believing in reincarnation, another is experiencing it first hand yourself. It really does change you, doesn't it?

    Re: the gender issues cropping up on this thread. I'm interested to read it, and some valid points have cropped up. Another point I want to add to the argument is that there are biological factors at play, too, to do with the hormonal cocktail that appears in the womb. Who knows if the incoming soul does influence the hormones on a subtle level -- that's another question. Considering Ian Stevenson's body of research on birthmarks as well as other physical deformities from injuries of the past selves influencing the new body it really shouldn't be out of question in my opinion. All I know is that my mother was sure I was a boy, even after I was born. She knew innately what gender I was, despite my biological makeup not being according to what she felt. As they say mother's know best. And it wasn't a case of wishful thinking, either -- she told me she wanted a girl as she did not want a boy who would 'end up like my dad', but she was fearful I was a boy and felt I would be.
     
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  5. KenJ

    KenJ Assistant Archivist and Moderator Staff Member Super Moderator

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    landsend, I wanted to refer to you somehow in my posts on this thread because of the things that you've posted. Your memories and writing abilities are marvelous, I would like everyone to read them. I'll link one.
     
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  6. KenJ

    KenJ Assistant Archivist and Moderator Staff Member Super Moderator

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    I really don’t like having to create secondary posts in order to complete a previous post, but it’s hard to unload all that is understood all at once. I was too egger to ‘get it out’.

    My reference to there being no accidents; due to a physician tinkering with a medication I suffered some problems while at the same time there were financial and house issues that stressed me badly. I “Accidentally” got a blood test three weeks early and the problem was detected, thus “There are no accidents” seemed evident to me.

    My statement that included my ex-wife surprised me as much as I imagine as it did her. We are simply actors with parts to play, and she played her part well, I guess I needed to acknowledge that! I believe that we agreed to our circumstances before we were born with our free-will to learn even more through our choices during the experience itself - and thinking of the timing of things that occurred.

    The name became more clear, it is Bezly or some similar spelling with the nick-name of "Beez", but now the first name morphs into Anthony.

    ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Now some old geezer talk

    Issues – I find a commonality among the many issues that members express that range from family or work to spiritual issues, it makes me wonder how they each can claim understanding reincarnation and yet obsess over something, that doesn’t add up to me – who is in control of your life? It is like my learning about “work”, I seldom worked, I turned the tasks into challenges or fun tests of my abilities, perhaps it helped that I had an “In your face” capability of handling things that I put to myself (i.e. In my own face).

    This includes issues relating to gender, that is why I appreciate landsend’s writings, the ability to put ‘flesh’ on the characters and address personal issues in direct yet subdued tone rather than the stick-figures and plodding that I seem to do in my posts. I feel like I'm trying to replicate the Sistine Chapel ceiling using stick-figures!

    ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

    Getting answers – I have found that I could not push for answers or a past life memory, the harder I tried, the further the prize. I realized, for me, that it was like the ability to dowse, we all have it, but it takes three things, an open mind, intent, and a relaxed state – pushing is not a relaxed state! I did not want to face the horrors of war or suffering, so I asked my guide(s) for help in selecting memories, starting me out in the shallow end of he swimming pool so to speak, and it didn’t take long to get my request to be answered. You have more abilities than you are aware of in this respect.
     
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  7. SeaAndSky

    SeaAndSky Senior Registered

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    Hi Ken,

    I especially like this:

    I think I'll try this route. It is good to have someone who knows more about what is behind the door and what you can stand making those selections. I can't even "see" the pool myself, much less tell where the "shallow end" is located and how to find the stairs where I can take it step-by-step. Someone to hold my hand makes a lot of sense.

    Cordially,
    S&S[/Quote]
     
  8. KenJ

    KenJ Assistant Archivist and Moderator Staff Member Super Moderator

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    S&S, you caught me editing my post, I altered it while still trying to get my thoughts together AGAIN.

    This morning I had to turn on my cell phone and record my thoughts so as not to forget them. Very interesting experience since I was without my glasses and had NEVER used that feature before:confused:.
    The swimming pool was just a metaphor I'd used in my first post and carried on to that one.
     
  9. SeaAndSky

    SeaAndSky Senior Registered

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    Hi Ken,

    I don't do multi-vitamins, but I do take (everyday) a multi-B vitamin, magnesium, zinc, and--as I feel the need--Ginkgo Biloba--to aid in concentration. If you're not, you may want to try this regimen. However, the fact that you could even figure out how to use that little doo-hickey in your hand shows me that you're not that far gone. (I haven't actually used that feature myself--I tend to not expand my technical knowledge of modern gadgetry until forced, much to my children's disgust).

    Cordially,
    S&S
     
  10. KenJ

    KenJ Assistant Archivist and Moderator Staff Member Super Moderator

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    You echo my thoughts somehow. This morning I was thinking that I'm an old man trying to be "hip" in an era when the term is no longer understood - like talking about S & H green-stamps and skate-keys!
    Concerning supplementation, I've done that for years, that's why it was so funny. That Dr. scoffed at them after being surprised at my health and lack of other medication, truly blinded by the pharma-industry.
     
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  11. Totoro

    Totoro Super Moderator Staff Member Super Moderator

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    I think ultimately, we have free will, but we are also ushered along by the powers that be. We still have the choice to go with or resist their influence. I always liked the analogy that we're steering the boat, but we don't control the wind. We can try to steer against the wind and no doubt, piloting the boat becomes harder. Or we can allow the wind to push us and the journey because easier.

    But the wind in this case isn't authority, in the sense that were used to in, incarnate. It's merely help & support. Sometimes we have to do it the hard way, before we learn our lessons and learn to trust the "wind". It's like with my son, he wanted this video card for his computer and it cost 500$. It had a plastic bezel on it he wanted to take off and paint and I told him not do it, but he did it anyway and in the process, he broke off a part and now the card is useless. So now he is going to take the money he earns from his summer job to buy a new one.

    I don't think free will is more complicated than that. I gave him the benefit of my experience and support and he chose to do it anyway. He ultimately has now chosen a harder path when that money could have been used for something else, rather than replacing the card.
     
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  12. KenJ

    KenJ Assistant Archivist and Moderator Staff Member Super Moderator

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    I’m about to burst from what I’ve gathered recently, things that have helped me in facing my next step, and a little different view of reincarnation with no other appropriate place to post it than this thread. My problem is that I tend to abuse this forum by using it as a blog at times.

    Some of my relatives have responded to the starting the-ball-rolling thing that I did. A cousin wrote to me about the visitation of a spirit/ghost of a family member that she had issues with and she wasn’t in the mood for forgiveness – she told it to go away and it did. The wife of a deceased cousin told me that she heard him faintly ask “Can you hear me?”, and yesterday I was at a gathering (nephew’s pre-marriage get-together) where a niece (his mother) told me that she had gotten a message from her husband telling her that “It wasn’t as scary as he thought it would be (to die)”, and for bonus points I saw her mother (my sister) there, but only in a mental review of the day.

    My eldest daughter did not write to me, but I know that she had an Out of Body Experience when she ‘flat-lined’ during surgery, and I was surprised to hear from my youngest daughter who told me of her dreams of being an Indian (presumably American). My middle daughter posted her many experiences. She also told me about something her younger sister experienced; she was driving past our small-town cemetery when an apparition of a deceased classmate appeared directly in front of her causing her to slam on the brakes.

    I’ve been blessed with some strong women in this life, and a psychic told me that she saw women all around me a few years ago, could it have something to do with my need for help to live as a man this time around? This psychic did drawings of the spirits that she saw and the one she drew (the one giving me messages) was male – resembling my father in his twenties (that sketch and recording were lost in a computer crash).

    As a father myself, it has been difficult to unbiasedly raise three daughters when one of them is a remembered soul-mate (I failed miserably). We all hope to find soul mates as partners in marriage, but they can serve as any character in the “theatrical performance” we are living. I’m convinced that we have more than one such relationship.

    I’ll be glad if and when this competitive mind-frame gets extinguished and one of more cooperation is established, but I see how conflict can be a useful tool in the growth process. Unfortunately, it becomes the focus rather than just a simple tool (and too much energy is put into it) much like my remembering’s at about five years of age not being ‘enough’ even though they set my path early on. The choreography of entwining the sub-plots with the ‘big picture’ is truly impressive.
     
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  13. KenJ

    KenJ Assistant Archivist and Moderator Staff Member Super Moderator

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    Some weird stuff of the past few weeks: I felt the presence of my German Shepherd and my wife told me later that she and our two dogs heard something running across our roof. And, a few minutes ago I seem to remember insisting with my life-planning committee that I wanted to keep my mental facilities until my body was finished - like sliding into home-plate.
     
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  14. SeaAndSky

    SeaAndSky Senior Registered

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    Hi Ken,

    Darn tootin'. :mad: I'm with you. Dying is dying and suffering is suffering, but let me do it with my mind intact. I don't mind taking whatever I decide to take to ease the pain/transition--whether it fuzzes me out or not. I'm no hero. But that is a voluntary choice made by a person who is still cognizant of his situation.

    Cordially,
    S&S

    PS--Interesting about your German Shepherd. You've probably talked about him/her before, but I'd like to hear some more.

    PPS--Who knows, perhaps he will be waiting to greet you when the time comes. It certainly sounds like he is hanging around. I scoffed when I once read something about the "Rainbow Bridge" with our beloved pets waiting to cross over with us when the time comes. (I think this is a modern concoction). But as time goes by it doesn't seem impossible that something like this might be true in a particular case. One part of me thinks this is all mighty strange, but another part doesn't mind at all. ;)
     
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  15. Jim78

    Jim78 Senior Registered

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    Thanks Ken. Maybe my own past life memories don't seem so out there to you now that you have a knowing.
     
  16. KenJ

    KenJ Assistant Archivist and Moderator Staff Member Super Moderator

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    Jim, They never really did seem too outlandish, my only concern was that you seemed to still think that way rather than learning from it and using that energy in a constructive way to somehow help others.
     
  17. Jim78

    Jim78 Senior Registered

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    I still think in military terms Ken but I see no harm in channeling my energy into reincarnation debate.

    Also I have used my energy in a constructive way in the past. I'll pm you with an example of how because I can't post it on a public forum.
     
  18. KenJ

    KenJ Assistant Archivist and Moderator Staff Member Super Moderator

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    Impressive!!!
     
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  19. KenJ

    KenJ Assistant Archivist and Moderator Staff Member Super Moderator

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    Here is a website that I frequent, and an interview that goes along with my 12,000+ year old memory of levitating an obelisk from a query. That amount of time for a memory gets me a "stink-eye" from my wife, but how else could I have had it since I was a child? It is hard to disprove that it didn't come from a book at this point in my life, the doubting continues it seems.
    https://hiddenincatours.com/latest-interview-about-megaliths-and-elongated-skulls-july-2-2019/
     
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  20. KenJ

    KenJ Assistant Archivist and Moderator Staff Member Super Moderator

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    I was told by Spirit that I would have a life-ending experience, or probable death event several months ago. To add into the mix was a doctor's meddling with my vitamin D2 levels creating brain-fog and making some bad decisions that took a bit of working on to correct.

    For those with open-mind (yes until you have such experiences you will not understand completely) my spirit-guide told me that I would have a ruptured artery in my left leg and after my writing that into my on-going journal I was told "Something like that" which of course didn't get written - kinda sneaky way of getting the message to me without showing "Scientific-proof". What happened was that I got a blood-clot in my right leg and found that I had simply worked myself through the maze that was presented to me - no true solutions to my problems, but I hope that you now have a glimpse of how things work in our lifetime experiences. The probability of becoming a "vegetable" is still a too close of an experience for comfort. My guide(s) have been very open and helpful to me through this lifetime, helping me handle the "performance" I've selected/given.

    What I learned was that despite my thinking and wishes to take the next exit-point in this lifetime, my ego and body had a bigger say in the matter and my loving wife is now facing increased needs from me as I continue to come apart. I have no understanding of my wife's life-script that she is working through - we are like caricatures in a theatrical performance with the freedom to add-lib/Free-choice in my understanding.
     

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