Ian's story.

Discussion in 'Children's Past Lives -Age 7 & under' started by 4mysonK, Nov 30, 2008.

  1. 4mysonK

    4mysonK 4mysonK

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    Hi,

    I’m so glad to have found this forum. Also, I emailed Carol, and she suggested I post my story here. Hopefully, you guys can give me some insight into this. The other stories and comments have helped me make connections I’ve never made before, so now my experience is even more detailed than I first told Ms. Bowman. Please excuse the length!

    I have a three-year-old son named Ian. He’s really strange, but in a good way. The kid is just amazingly good. Nearly every time we go out, a stranger will comment on how ‘adult-like’ he is, and that’s true. He acts like a very protective, very smart MAN. Also, his comprehension level and reactions to things surprise me constantly.

    When he was 10 months old, I found out I had a brain tumor, which had to be surgically removed immediately. That left me unable to walk, eat, write, etc. (I’m much better now, by the way.) I also have narcolepsy. My life isn’t easy, to say the least, and I swear, if I had any other ‘kind’ of child, I don’t know how I’d manage.

    When he wasn’t even two, he’d come to me as I cried from either physical or mental pain. “Mama cry?” He might pat my knee. “Mama ok?” Smile. “It ok, Mama.” Then, he’d inevitably go get his Dad to help me, even when I hadn’t asked him to. “Daddy, Mama need you.”

    During these situations, he never seemed scared or confused. Keep in mind that I had an eye-patch, half of my face was paralyzed, my voice was different, too. I was scary! Plus, I’d sometimes be crying kind of hysterically, with no intention of him even seeing me. He’d seek me out. Always calm, cool, and collected. But at the same time, he’s always warm and protective. This has continued in the same way. Last month, my rib suddenly became dislocated, and I couldn’t breathe. I was gasping for air, and although he was concerned, he never panicked. Last week, I fell in the kitchen, and this time, I was screaming in pain and crying. He came running, but his reaction was, “Where is the phone? I need to call Daddy.” He was worried about me, but as usual, his need to DO something was very strong. No fear.

    Now for the things he’s said:

    Ever since he could talk, he would mention “Soh-Soh” and sometimes “Fay-oh.” I never understood where he got these so-called names, but he would never falter. Soh-Soh was especially important to him. I’m not saying he had an imaginary friend he talked to. He talked about these people as if they were real. Soh-Soh, as he’s always insisted, is his girl. He’s going to marry her, no doubt about it. In fact, when he sees any kind of flower, real or fake, he rushes to it. Just this week, we were in a craft store, and he brought me some. “Mom, I’m going to get these for the wedding.” La-ti-da! “What wedding?” (I TRY to never prompt his answers.) “To Soh-Soh.” “Ah, yes. Well, we’ll get her some later.” “Ok.”

    This has happened many, many times. He mentions his wedding a LOT. He’s also very adamant that Soh-Soh loves red. Everything seems to be red. Her house, her dress, her lips, her flowers, etc. Once, I was making a bouquet for a friend, and when he saw it, his mouth dropped. It was all red and pink. “Mom! Mom, is that for Soh-Soh?!” “No.” He got mad! “But red is her favorite color! Let me have that for my wedding!” He got so riled-up (which is extremely rare) that I finally gave him some leftover flowers. He wasn’t completely satisfied, but took them. *By the way, he doesn’t particularly care for red.*

    Before I was even interested in past lives, this is the story he told me. I didn’t prompt him AT ALL, and we were cooking at the time, so it seemed to be out of the blue.

    "In my old life, my best friend was a king. He (did something to) Soh-Soh. I took my sword and tried to kill him, but he killed me first with his sword."

    I was raised a Christian, so I’ve never believed in these things, but as was mentioned in the “4 signs,” I somehow knew this was no imaginary story. His tone was completely different. I wish I could remember exactly what the ‘king’ did.

    After reading parts of the forum, I realized I should try to catch him when he was relaxed, so after waking, I immediately put him in the bath. During this time, he told me that Soh-Soh’s house is red, but it has ‘yellow stuff’ all over it, in every room. I asked him what kind of yellow, and he pointed out the faucet, which looks gold, then he went on to tell me all the rooms it was in. He also said her Dad is really nice. There’s more, but I can’t tell you everything. Too much!

    Later, I began to write down our conversations. Excuse the ‘script’ of it, but that way seemed easiest to understand.

    This past Friday:
    We were talking about dreams, and he was telling me about a particular one. I said, "Did you really dream that or is it a pretend dream?" He said "real". (More discussion.) Since he seemed sure about reality and pretend, I continued.

    Mom: Is Soh-Soh for real or for pretend?

    Ian: .........Just pretend. (Grinning. That's the first time he's ever said that.)

    Mom: Ok. (Phew!) You sure have been talking about her for a long time.

    Ian: Well, she comes to my house.

    Mom: When does she come to your house?

    Ian: She comes to my house all pretty for a dance. (He tried closing the door, then opened it to correct himself.) ...I mean, wedding.

    Mom: But when does she come to your house?

    Ian: ......Saturday? (He says that for every kind of WHEN question, so I just kept going.)

    Mom: No, I mean, does she come to your house now?

    Ian: Soh-Soh is coming up in my life.

    Mom: Coming up in your life? What does that mean?

    Ian: She's coming to me.

    Mom: What? Is she real or not?

    Ian. She's real, but she's not here. She's coming up in my life.

    Mom: How?

    Ian: That's just how everything goes.
     
  2. 4mysonK

    4mysonK 4mysonK

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    A few minutes later, I started straightening my hair, and I thought I'd see if he'd talk more. I thought if I kept myself busy, it might keep him at ease, and not seem like I was giving him a test. He was in the other room, so I yelled for him.


    Mom: Leon! (He told me the other day that Soh-Soh calls him Leon.)


    Ian: What? (Comes running.) I'm Ian.


    Mom: Oh.


    Ian: Leon is what Soh-Soh calls me. That's the old Ian. I'm the new Ian.


    Mom: Oh, I see.


    Ian: He was mean. (I’d never heard that before.)


    Mom: Oh? Was he mean to Soh-Soh?


    Ian: Yes, he was really mean to Soh-Soh. He was like this: (Angry face.)


    Mom: Oooh, ok. So...uh...(trying to keep up the convo)...Is Soh-Soh a ghost?


    Ian: (laughing) Nooo, she's real!


    Mom: Oh, ok. Well, uh....does Leon speak English?


    Ian: No. He goes like this.....(stands and stares for about 5 seconds)....blah, blah, blah.


    Mom: Those aren't words. He says that?


    Ian: Yeah, like...blah, blah, blah.


    Mom: Can you understand him?


    Ian: Yeah.


    Mom: Where does he live?


    Ian: Center Hill sky.


    (That's where I grew up, not the town's name, but the community. The area is just called that by people around there, not mapped. I’m sure he’s heard someone mention that before, but it’s not something we sit around discussing.)


    Mom: Oh. So, can I meet him?


    Ian: No! He's mean.


    Mom: But, I thought he was you.


    Ian: Yeah, but he was mean. Now he's dead. Now I'm the new Ian. Soh-Soh thinks it's funny my name is Ian.


    (Can’t remember what was next.)


    Mom: Where did you say he lived?


    Ian: In a old grass house....in Center Hill sky.


    Mom: Ah, ok. How long did he live there? (I should've known better. That's a hard concept---years, months, even days.)


    Ian: Hm....fifty hours?


    Mom: Is that a long time?


    Ian: Yes, a long time. Look Mom, it's like this.


    *He's standing near the bathroom door, on one side is this really old door knob that's brassy, but the finish is worn off badly. On the other side is a new knob that's silver.*


    Ian: See, Leon lives on this side. The old side. The one with the hole. (Points.) Now, I'm the new Ian and we live on this side. (Points to silver side.)


    Mom: So, is Leon still there?


    Ian: No, he's dead.


    *When typing this to record it, I started getting confused as to what had been said, so since he was beside me on the sofa, I asked.*


    Mom: What was it you said about Leon? Is he alive?


    Ian: I'm Leon.


    Mom: I know, but I can't remember what you said.


    Ian: I'm Leon.


    Mom: Did Leon's body die?


    Ian: No. I AM Leon.


    Mom: I know, but you're Ian and you're alive.


    Ian: Yeah.


    Mom: Ok. (Forget it!) What did Leon's body look like?


    Ian: A snake. A suit. A snake suit like he's a superhero.


    Mom: (Laughing.) You're just making that up.


    Ian: (Turns and POW! Evil eye!) I am not! I'm serious!


    Mom: Ok, so how would Leon have a snake body....or suit or whatever.


    Ian: He had them everywhere. Here and here and here. (Pointing.) All over his body.


    Mom: Snakes on a suit?


    Ian: Nooo, they were on his skin. Tattoos all over. They were red.


    Mom: Leon liked red?


    Ian: Yes, but I like green now.


    Mom: Oh.


    (Insert stuff I can't remember! Sorry.)


    Mom: I don't understand all this old Ian, new Ian stuff. I don't remember stuff like that.


    Ian: But I do. I remember it.


    We talked some more and he was going on and on about all kinds of odd things. I kept trying to ask him questions, so he just put his head down.


    Mom: Am I confusing you?


    Ian: Nope, but I'm confusing you!


    An hour or so later, we went for a walk. He was very preoccupied by jumping, playing with a big stick, playing in the leaves, etc. I thought it would be a good time to talk to him while he wasn’t thinking so hard. Also, I want to mention that he doesn’t spend time thinking about the answers at all, unless he looks to be ‘trying to remember.’


    We came upon some big rocks, where someone had lined their drainage system, and he began crawling on them. He said it looked like a mountain, and I asked if he’d ever climbed a mountain. He said, “Oh yes, with Soh-Soh and Kang-Seok.”


    *Kang-Seok is this Korean friend of ours. I’ll get to that later.*


    Mom: Oh, so you knew Kang-Seok?


    Ian: Yes, he was my good friend.


    Mom: Ahh. What was his name?


    Ian: It was Kang-Seok. He came back as Kang-Seok again. (NO prompting from me!)


    More walking, but I’m not talking.


    Ian: Mom, you’re not saying my name right.


    Mom: How do you say it?


    Ian: It’s not LEE-on. It’s Li-AHN. (Li-an? Li-ang? Not sure.)


    We kept walking and met an old man. Ian will talk to anyone. He’s completely unafraid of strangers and will only mildly put on a shy act for a few seconds, if at all. He walked right up and talked about the stick he was carrying. When we walked away, he said, “That old man sure was nice. But he was old.” I asked him, “What happens when you’re old?” He didn’t know.


    So, I wondered if maybe he’d never gotten old. I waited a bit, and while he played in the leaves, I asked something more.


    Mom: What happens when we die?


    Ian: You go to jail.


    Mom: What does jail look like? (He knows what a jail is.)


    Ian: It looks like a dead city. A dead, dead city.


    Mom: Oh. So, when Soh-Soh died, did she go there?


    Ian: (Stopped and looked at me.) No! She was nice!


    Mom: Oh. Where did she go?


    Ian: She went to the great mountain. The great mountain king made her all better.


    Mom: What does the great mountain look like?


    Ian:............Like a golden army.
     
  3. 4mysonK

    4mysonK 4mysonK

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    There’s MORE!


    When he’s playing alone or really giddy from being excited, he’ll start saying these words. I never paid much attention to them until I read things on this forum. The other day, we were tickling each other and he said I was ‘poki.’ I asked what that meant, and he said, “It’s kind of like happy.” My Korean friend didn’t know what the word meant, but I looked it up online and one definition of it is: To have a pleasant face or expression. (Who knows if it's right, though.) Last night, he was playing with his jacket, which he’d put on a hook, and was making the arms of it dance around. He was going, “Anyoung, Anyoung, Anyoung” over and over again, like he was making it talk. That means “Hello” in Korean. I know at some point, our friend tried to teach him a few words, but Ian could never consciously remember them. I’ve asked specifically. Kang did comment on how strange it was that Ian can pronounce every word perfectly the first time, which is something he’d never heard someone do. (Then again, children are generally better at pronouncing foreign words SOMETIMES.)


    The story gets a little stranger here—


    Back when he was in the bath, I asked him if Soh-Soh was her real name. I couldn’t find anything online that indicated that Soh-Soh was a name, so it made me wonder. He said, “No, it’s not her real name. I just call her that for love.”


    I started thinking. In Korea, you say the person’s last name first. Maybe it’s a play off her last name? I looked it up. Apparently, Soh is an ancient Korean surname that had something to do with the royalty of the Shilla dynasty. It said only about 90 people still have that name. They’re still living in that region.


    Ok, now. Back in 2001, my husband and I decided we’d like to go teach English in Korea. We knew NO ONE who’d ever done that. We knew NO ONE there. We just looked online and got jobs. There was one church there, but it was an hour from where we lived. That town happens to be the capitol city of the Shilla dynasty. That’s where we met Kang-Seok! We instantly felt like family. Honestly, it was a very intense connection, not just with him, but with his parents, too.


    A few years later, when we were back in TN, he had the opportunity to go to school in the USA, but was thinking maybe he wouldn’t do it. He emailed to ask if we knew where that particular college was located. Ten minutes from us! So, he decided to come here. That’s how he’s around Ian now, and they are extremely close. Kang is more like a brother than a friend. We’re completely relaxed around each other.


    Keep in mind that South Korea is the size of Kentucky. Why, in the whole world, would we randomly choose that exact spot to live? Not even that, it was a small portion of that area! Strangely, we never experienced ‘culture shock’ and never felt homesick. Still, to this day, I miss it terribly.


    Also, we thought we couldn’t have children, and before we went to Korea, we’d pretty much made up our minds we’d want to adopt a Korean child. When people ask us why we chose Korea, we tell them something about maybe wanting a kid from there—blah, blah, blah. Really, we had no idea.


    After 7 years of marriage, and no reason I hadn’t become pregnant, it finally happened. (We were neither trying nor avoiding it.) A nurse in rehab told me that if I hadn’t become pregnant, they wouldn’t have found the tumor in time to save me. The fast-growing cells made me symptomatic, and I hadn’t been before.


    Has my son come back to protect me? :-o


    Again, I’m SO sorry this was long. I just wanted all the info out there, so you guys could give me your thoughts. How should I proceed? What should I look for? Am I doing anything wrong with my questioning?


    THANKS!
     
  4. Deborah

    Deborah Executive Director Staff Member

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    Welcome 4mysonK,


    Thank you for sharing your son's experiences with us. I will come back tomorrow with a few thoughts and a few links on the forum you might be interested in. In the mean time - have you read the book Old Souls? There is a story --- actually a few you might find interesting. Especially with regard to how children choose their parents - or are drawn to them. Ian Stevenson's work is fantastic!


    It's late here - but I am off tomorrow and will be back in the morning with a few more thoughts and questions. Again - welcome. :D
     
  5. ChrisR

    ChrisR Administrator Staff Member Super Moderator

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    Hello and welcome to the forum. Thanks for sharing Ian's experience with us, and there's no need to apologize for the length of it, it was very fascinating to read.


    To answer your questions, I think you should just proceed as you have been doing by letting him talk about his memories and acknowledging what he has to say. It's good that you make him feel comfortable enough to be able to talk about this to you. Maybe you could try and get him to express himself some more on paper by drawing pictures?


    As long as his memories are not disturbing him in any way, then I would say just carry on as you are by listening to him. Have you read either of Carol's books? They are very good books which I think you would be able to relate to.


    Thanks again for sharing, please keep us updated, and I hope you enjoy your time here.


    Chris - :)
     
  6. alaskanlaughter

    alaskanlaughter Senior Registered

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    Hi and welcome! :) His story was very interesting to read through. I think you are doing the right things, and I agree with Chris about seeing if he will draw some pictures.


    I was fascinated to read how you ended up in Korea and met this person that you and your husband and son have such a connection with. It's such a small world sometimes and connections can be anywhere. He also sounds like a great person and understanding of your son.


    Keep us updated! :thumbsup:
     
  7. 4mysonK

    4mysonK 4mysonK

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    Thanks, everyone. I ordered the book Deborah suggested, and also Carol's books. They should be here in a couple of days. I can't wait to dig in!


    We went to the mall today, and once again, Ian picked out some things for Soh-Soh. Lately, he's been saying that she's 3, just like him. ??? He also says she had brown hair before, but now it's blonde. What do you think about this? I'm so new to everything that I'm getting dizzy from all the info. :)


    If she's 'waiting,' which is what I assumed since he says she's still in the sky, she comes to him, and also that he can talk to her, how can she be 3-years-old? In your experience, how does this all "work"? He seems 100% sure that he'll see her again. Is he just projecting the idea of age onto her since that's how he relates to himself?


    Hmm....It's all so interesting. :D
     
  8. tanguerra

    tanguerra Senior Registered

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    Hi 4mysonK.


    Welcome to the forum. I would say it is quite indisputable that your son is having past life memories. Make sure you keep careful records of all this. He will find it of great interest and very useful if his memories begin to fade as he grows up as they often do.


    You are both very lucky to have found each other. Blessings to you. There is absolutely nothing to be afraid of or upset about. This is a wonderful thing and I have no doubt you have this son to help you in your illness and he has you to help him work out what sounds like some fairly complex karma.


    There is not necessarily any conflict between a belief in reincarnation and Christianity. In fact, there is good evidence that Christ talked about reincarnation fairly often, but those bits were deleted by the early Church, as they felt that a fear of hell and a hope of heaven would be better persuaders of the people to be 'good' (and go to Church on a regular basis).

    This is a very beautiful image of heaven and 'God' (however you perceive her) seen through the eyes of a small child from his very own quite recent 'memory'.

    It seems pretty straightforward to me. :)


    I would suspect that what he is saying is that Soh-Soh has reincarnated and is now 3 years old. She is blonde now and she is 'waiting' to bump into him one day, as soul mates have a way of doing, but perhaps not until they grow up.


    He can 'talk to her' with his 'spirit'. Have you ever talked to someone in your dreams who you loved, but were far away from? Or even sometimes thought you could hear them talking to you, in your quiet moments? I see no reason why your very mature and aware son would not have such an experience just as a grown up would, even more so perhaps I would think.

    This is gorgeous and such a very eloquent image! Same door knob - one part of it all old and dark, the other part all shiny and new.


    I wonder if the 'snake suit like he's a superhero' he talks about might be some kind of armour? All shiny and segmented like scales? That was the first image that occurred to me. I wonder how I would have explained it when I was little and didn't know the right word? He also talked about being covered in red tattoos, but perhaps a bit of both was going on - snake tattoos and armour? A bit of googling on that might turn up some interesting Korean marital arts traditions or similar?


    I was a precocious child in that way too, perhaps not quite as amazing as your son, but 'up there'. I wrote about it here - towards the end, but the whole thread is a good one. I remembered a lot of things, and was very 'grown up' for my age, but I had nobody to talk to about it. Whenever I would ask a weird question, or try to talk about any of these things my parents frankly had no idea what I was trying to communicate. I didn't really understand it myself, but I quickly worked out that things went smoother if I just kept 'all that' to myself and acted normal.


    My main bit of advice is just to relax. Don't push him too hard to give you details, although I understand how fascinating and exciting it all is. Don't create any 'spookiness' about the whole business. Just be natural, as you have been doing, and go easy. If he was 'bad' as he says in his previous life, some of his memories might be very 'bad' too. So be very gentle and let him talk about it if he wants to, but let him go at his own pace. Drawing pictures is good, as Chris says, to help him get his ideas across where his vocabulary might still be letting him down at his age.


    Watch out for nightmares. He will likely have some 'bad stuff' coming up from time to time. Just give him lots of cuddles, if something like that happens. It's a good thing. Maybe talk about it with him again in the morning if he wants to, or if he remembers the dream.


    Above all, remember he is 'Ian' now. Leon is dead. This life is a brand new one full of exciting possibilities by the sound of it.


    Again welcome to the forum and thank you for your wonderful story about your amazing little boy.
     
  9. Karoliina

    Karoliina Moderator Emerita

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    Hello and welcome to the forum. :)


    Thanks for sharing that wonderful story about your son, his Korean past life memories and your family's connection to the country and culture.


    I'm glad you're getting good books to read now, especially Carol's, as they will most likely answer many of your questions. :thumbsup:


    It's difficult to say what parts about Ian's talk about Soh-Soh coming back are strict facts. It's possible Soh-Soh is currently waiting to be reborn, but Ian sees her as she will be when she's 3 in her next incarnation. Many parents, for example, have dreams about their future children, seeing clearly how they will look like when they're toddlers. :) Another possibility might be that she is already 3 and living in her new body somewhere, but is meeting Ian in the astral plane, in dreams, and they both know their paths will cross later. Just a couple of suggestions.


    I think you're doing a great job being a loving and supportive parent to Ian. I'm sorry to hear you've been having some physical difficulties, and hope you will continue to get better by the day.


    Good luck with everything and please keep us posted.


    Karoliina
     
  10. Natalie

    Natalie New Member

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    Thank you for sharing
     
  11. W.A. HEART

    W.A. HEART Senior Registered

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    Hi!


    Thank you so much for sharing all this! I must say I love your son, he's terrific...

    :D :D:D


    Lovely!


    My oldest son reminds me of your Ian. He also remembers many things and is incredibly mature for his age, always has been. He is not as articulate about it as your son is, but he "just knows" things, like he knows rupee is the Indian currency. He also some times converts euros into our old portuguese escudos (he was born after they were gone) - when I ask how did you know that? he just says, uuhh I dunno. I just do!


    welcome! keep us posted!


    Love


    Welsh
     
  12. 4mysonK

    4mysonK 4mysonK

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    Hi everyone! I thought I'd update you a little bit.


    A few minutes ago, he was talking about being a "ghost boy." Unfortunately, I'm unable to remember the actual conversation---not even enough to paraphrase it. Soooo sleeeepy!


    I know that I asked him if he could see me when he was Liang. (By the way, I just asked him if his name was Lian or Liang, and he said it had a "guh" on the end. Apparently, Lian is a Chinese girl's name, but Liang is a boy's name.) Anyway, he said he couldn't see me because he was a ghost boy. He also said he was invisible at the time. I asked if he was a ghost boy or a ghost man. He said boy.


    He reiterated that Soh-Soh now has blonde hair, and he's also saying that she likes pink now. For so long, he's said everything about her was red. If indeed, she is a little girl somewhere on Earth, she's probably got a lot of pink to deal with!


    Talking about Liang again, he said, "I went to school. I went to school A LOT." The answer to what he learned there was, "I learned how to speak English like Kang-Seok."


    I find that interesting that he even thinks of Kang-Seok in that way. One would think a kid would just assume he "knows" English, not that he had to learn it anywhere. Ian seems very aware of people speaking other languages.


    Thinking back on it, I know of instances where he surprised me with his understanding. More than once, we've been at a playground, and he was happy to play with children who only spoke Spanish. On one occasion, as soon as we got into the car, he commented on their speech. I tried giving him the dumbed-down version--i.e. They use other WORDS. His response was, "Mom, they didn't know how to speak English, but I do." This happened last fall when he was two!


    Also this morning, he said that he'd known Kang-Seok as a ghost. I said, "Oh, I though you'd climbed a mountain with him." He said, "Yeah, but it was a ghost mountain." Hmm.


    Somehow, Liang (which is definitely not a Korean name) has some connection with Korea---people, language, etc. Soh-Soh, however, could easily be a Korean name, as I said in my earlier post.


    I know, I'm going on and on here, but I wanted to address a couple of things. I've been reading through more of the threads, so things have come up.


    There was something said about physical traits being carried over. Throughout my life, really only from college-age on, people have asked me if I'm half Asian. (Broad and silly term, actually.) Even in Korea, some people thought I was half Korean! One day (in the USA), I was holding a new student, a Korean boy, and a parent came in and asked if he was my son. Also, someone once asked my husband if I was Mongolian. Ha! Interesting.... (I should add that people think my sister is German. Heh.)


    Also, after reading through all that Bible stuff (thanks to Chris for posting the links for me), I realized that what Ian described as a"jail/dead city" for bad people, and the "great mountain" for good people is very consistent with what many believe. There is a 'holding place,' for the souls. Are there any particular instances you guys can remember of a child speaking about this waiting area for souls? I'd like to compare. :eek: )
     
  13. Ailish

    Ailish Administrator Emerita

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    Hi 4mysonK,


    Fascinating stuff, thanks for the update :D

    You may enjoy the thread Intermission Period Experiences/Spiritual Pre-existence - I believe there are a couple of cases mentioned there. :)


    Aili
     
  14. soulfreindly

    soulfreindly Senior Registered

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    Your questioning in such a concentrated manor sounds very good. From what I have read you are coming from it as a caring person interested in what your son is feeling and thinking about.


    Having you to talk to will surely be of great help to your son. Sometimes that is all we need, to have someone affirm us, so that we will be able to get on with being here with peace in our life this time.


    That is interesting about the different holding places. I am wondering about asking him if he has any feelings of his freinds being in a place where he cannot communicate with them


    I think you are doing a marvellous job to help your son share and open up to find his peace.


    Maybe if you ask about the good, normal stuff going on it that life.. like what his home is like. Play off of the positive things he refers to.. Then once he is confident that that life is not going to hurt him again, you can assure him that he does not have to live with the bad memories.


    Soulfreindly
     
  15. 4mysonK

    4mysonK 4mysonK

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    Soulfriendly, I asked Ian about the dead city.


    This is what he says, summarized:


    You can't talk to people in the dead city.


    There is a "bad guy" that made him go into the dead city. He is "blonde" and has a "hairy face." He was also the one that wouldn't allow anyone to talk to each other.


    He said that people in the Great Mountain/City (interchangeable) CAN talk to each other.


    There are three "guys" that he called "Northies, like the North Pole". Those guys are "really, really nice." They helped him out of the dead city. They were named "Grass, Doctor, and Drinker." He liked Drinker best because he helped Ian find Soh-Soh.


    He said in order to get out of there he had to "do it himself" and had to "jump down."---Somehow with the help of the Northies.


    There are two choices. Mean or Nice. That's it.


    He says he chose us as his parents, and could see us, but he couldn't talk to us. I asked what we were doing when he saw us, and he said, "Just messin' around looking for me." He can give no solid answer as to why he made that choice, but only says, "You're my favorite Mom."


    There was something about Soh-Soh being his "two chances." I couldn't understand what he meant, and although I tried carefully questioning him, he never could word it in a way that made sense to me.


    If I remember any more, I'll get back to you. Thanks for prompting me to ask those questions!


    *In addition...Today, he told me that although Soh-Soh's Dad is really nice, her Mom and brother are very mean. The "now" Soh-Soh.


    I think I'm going to give it a rest for today. He started referring to Ian in the 3rd person, so I thought I'd better cut it short. He also said, "That's so nice of you!" When I turned to ask about it, he said, "Oh, I was talking to my friend." Then he pointed in front of him. He's done this before, saying there are people "over there" while pointing. Of course, he talks to himself CONSTANTLY. I joke that he might as well be a chatty little girl as much as he talks. Who knows if he was playing or not. I just knew it was time to stop.


    :thumbsup:
     
  16. tanguerra

    tanguerra Senior Registered

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    Fascinating!


    Yes, good idea to give it a bit of a rest for a bit. As long as he knows he can talk to you about it all whenever he wants, that's enough.


    If you have not seen it, I recommend taking a look at the movie with Robin Williams 'What dreams may come'. It is a nice exploration of what happens after death and rings true to me. It is not very scary or anything, and your son might even enjoy it (but you should watch it first to make sure you don't think there is anything that would upset him).


    It is a bit 'Hollywood' and over the top in some places - particularly regards to the difficult issue of suicide - which I guess is just the way of creating some dramatic tension in the film - but it is well worth a look and is a good piece of entertainment anyway.


    It explores the notion that 'heaven' is a fairly individualised experience and 'hell' is not like it was depicted in the middle ages, with devils and fire and whatnot (a very old fashioned notion in my view) but more a kind of 'nothing' place where people go to sort themselves out between lives - a bit like your son describes and similar to Soulfriendly's 'bardo' experience as well.
     
  17. 4mysonK

    4mysonK 4mysonK

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    This stuff has changed my whole perception of life. I feel like a weight has been lifted off my body in a HUGE WAY.


    Most beautifully, my relationship with Ian is different. I can't begin to explain how my view has changed. He's not just a kid anymore. He's a wise old soul. I felt so proud that I could actually ask him such an important question, and he had some answers. And to think that he chose me? Wow.
     
  18. tanguerra

    tanguerra Senior Registered

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    You're doing very well 4mysonK. It's great to have someone else share a similar experience isn't it? Very affirming! :)


    I know this is all paradigm shifting stuff. Steady as she goes though. Don't forget that Ian is, and isn't, a 'little kid' all at the same time. It is different for everyone, but often the memories begin to fade out as kids get older - usually pretty much disappearing around age 7. This is all part of the usual, natural process and mostly it's a good thing. Most people have enough to cope with doing one life at a time!


    Ian is obviously very special and he might keep remembering. I certainly did, as did several others on the forum - but the norm is to forget as we grow up. Be sure to make a scrap book or similar of all this stuff and any pictures he may draw and so on, to keep for when he is older in case he forgets about all this, or just loses interest in it, as well he may.


    Always remember he is a little boy NOW and he has a very big and important job to do - growing up happy and healthy and strong.


    Namaste to you and your family.
     
  19. Tuwamare

    Tuwamare New Member

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    What a beautiful case this is! I really enjoyed reading about your son... thank you for posting your experiences with him.
     
  20. IrisG.

    IrisG. Senior Registered

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    Hello,


    this is an interesting story indeed! If I understand it right, Center Hill sky is in the U.S.A.? Then it seems that Ian refers to a person of Korean origin who lived in the U.S.A. for at least part of his life? Then I`d guess the this life might not too long ago in the distance part for a completely tatooed Korean living in America isn`t something I expect to have happened decades ago! By the way, is it possible that your Korean friend was actually "himself" when Ian lived before, only younger? Did you ever tell him about your son`s remarks or isn`t he someone who is open to such issues? By the way, Ian seems to be really good with words for a three-year-old, so I bet there is a lot to come up:thumbsup:!
     

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