I've never felt so alone

Discussion in 'Reincarnation Questions' started by Vogue_1983., Jul 17, 2019.

  1. Vogue_1983.

    Vogue_1983. Senior Member

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    It has been a while since I've posted my last thread on here (a couple of months.)And Lately I haven't been feeling any better.I got the suggestion to get a past life regression,but unfortunately I'm 15 and I still live with my parents,and I don't feel comfortable telling anyone about my past lives and if I told my parents I wanted a regression they would've thought I was crazy.I figured the best thing I can do is keeping everything to myself.(except on this site ofc)bc this seems like the only place where people would not think I'm crazy when I talk about this.However I still don't feel comfortable sharing my full name or details about my past lives.Anyhow,I'm writing this new thread because I've been feeling very badly lately.I've never seen my current "family" as my real family.It just feels as if i'm living with strangers in my house.I just don't feel any type of bonding with any of them.Except maybe my current sister,but sometimes I just wish she wasn't my sister and I just end up feeling adopted.I just refuse to believe that I biologically am I child of these horrid people.I had 6 other siblings(in my past life) ,and I miss each of them terribly.But I just end up feeling guilty for it or something because it just feels as if I don't have the right to call them family anymore.I just know if I would tell them I'm their deceased sister who died 71 years ago they would probably be very upset and slightly offended.But I can't tell them either because they are all dead.There's nowhere to go with my horrid missing.Nobody I once knew or loved is here.I feel so alone and I can feel tears comming up while writing this.I sometimes ask myself if this is all real or if this is just a phase,but then again I start crying and being really upset like never before when thinking about my sisters and everyone I've lost one by one and then I realize it can't be just a phase because if it where I would'nt feel this way nor cry and have depressive episodes like that.Also when I look in the mirror I just don't see myself sometimes.I just feel like I'm trapped in this unknown body sometimes and wonder if god is punishing me for making me look so different.I lost all traits I had back then I was once proud of.I'ts just awfull to still feel this way even if I have a bunch of friends etc.(but ofc I don't tell them either bc I don't know what they would think about me afterwards)I just feel so empty.Hope anyone can relate to this so I feel less alone in this whole situation.
     
    Last edited: Jul 17, 2019
  2. soulfreindly

    soulfreindly Senior Registered

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    Morning Vogue

    I am sorry you are struggling .. I have felt like you ... caught in my past ... not totally able to function in my now body. My problems stem alot from poor health .. ie a dis=eased body which triggers my mind to stay stuck in my feelings. My body and brain is just not working well > Without proper nutrients getting to our bran we will feel in a constant state of stress . .

    I recommend looking for support with groups who are involved in finding help for depression / anxiety through help with nutritional and as well homeopathic support.

    I get extremely depressed with my body being low in a neurotransmitter called dopamine. Without taking a supplemental herb to replace dopamine I am triggering all the time .. I take other supplements like b vitamins etc which help a lot..

    I have found the best help with consulting a homeopathic doctor . Homeopathy is a very subtle way of healing .. bringing the body back into balance so it is absorbing all the nutrients we need and helping the body to detox> After some time in treatment I am not triggering nearly so badly

    I continue to do past life regression therapy as it continues to help . but I am not getting so overwhelmed with feelings and they do not pull my spirits down so much

    I do not feel the need to tell other people about my realizations about my past lives now that I am feeling physically better.. with more health comes the ability to know I can take care of myself . I no longer feel making peace with my past is the only way for me to find happiness... I can handle more stress and function ..

    I as well have not felt close to my family members . I have made peace through the regression work that this family was chosen for me for specific reasons. I have not had an easy life but it has been a wealth of learning .. This is a good place to come to hang out . I have found great solace knowing I am not alone..
     
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  3. Vogue_1983.

    Vogue_1983. Senior Member

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    Thanks for your reply!I appreciate your advice,but sadly I'm not in the right situation right now to get any sort of regression etc.If I would try and reach out I would of course have to tell my parents everything.Which isn't very convenient since I don't feel comfortable talking to anyone about this.And surely not my parents.But I'm still glad someone can kinda relate to what I'm going through at the moment.
     
  4. KenJ

    KenJ Assistant Archivist and Moderator Staff Member Super Moderator

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    That is pretty heavy stuff for someone your age, especially with the things going on with your body and relationships. I'm glad that you seem to have "...a bunch of friends..." that give you some support outside of your family. Keep in mind that you were privy to your current environment prior to being born, if not instrumental in the design, for a reason that is supposed to be hidden.

    As for your family, I'd bet that members of your current family are playing the parts that you all agreed upon before you were born. For you to "learn the lesson" that you set for yourself, it may be necessary to do it mainly through your own resources, hopefully we can help a little bit.
     
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  5. Vogue_1983.

    Vogue_1983. Senior Member

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    thanks for your reply.I guess I'll try to be a more active on this forum,maybe reading other people's stories will distract me from the intense emotions I'm feeling at the moment :.)
     
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  6. GalaxyDreamer90

    GalaxyDreamer90 Senior Member

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    I felt and still feel the same way when I was your age. Somehow I always knew I came from the forest. About a year and a half ago I had a past life regression confirming I did indeed come from the forest in a past life. The best advice I can give you is since your a teen and don't feel comfortable with your family is to look forward to growing up and moving out on your own. Also I would reccomend telling no one about your past life because people will think you're mental. If only I had realized that when I was your age. Also don't get so caught up in the past and look forward to the future and eventually being an adult.
     
  7. Eva1942

    Eva1942 A Walking Enigma..

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    Hello Vogue!

    When I was 15, I was enduring what I call ‘Holocaust 2.0’ (Domestic Violence). It was one of my lessons for PL self to experience the consequence of the actions he inflicted on others. It was tough, but the lesson was learned.

    As for me myself, while all this was going on, I was researching the paramilitary forces of Nazi Germany (ugh, dislike that word because not all of us were ‘Nazi’s’ :rolleyes: ). Thankfully I had a friends Dad who also was keen on Germany’s armed forces so we often talked about my research. Never had even though of the possibility of PL’s though.

    In my own experience, often when one has PL memories revealed, it can you feel very alone. I remember feeling very alone when my first memories surfaced at 27. Whenever I had a day off from work, I would just go out and be in my own. I didn’t want to be at home. I found many neat places around my home city that became sometimes ‘safe places’ for me — some I would catch two trains to get to. I don’t visit some of those places now because I have learned better coping methods and techniques, but why not get out and explore your home city?

    Some people think that there is not a ‘spiritual’ side to remembering PL’s when in fact there IS. Others prefer to ‘forget’ about that side but it’s difficult not to. We chose to remember for some reason or another. Had you thought about asking your guides for help? You do have them, they are waiting to help you.

    Anyways, I better stop before I break the rules. Hope you feel better soon.

    Eva x

    Ps. Feeling bad is good unless it’s a physical feeling bad..
     
  8. Vogue_1983.

    Vogue_1983. Senior Member

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    I've actually never thought about guides not knew I actually had them lol.(I've heard I'llabout spiritual guides countless times but never took it too seriously and eventually forgot about the whole concept)i'll do more research on it for sure.Also there are indeed some quiet places in my city that I already visit quite frequently :.)
     
  9. Ophelia3

    Ophelia3 Senior Registered

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    Hey Vogue,

    Yearning is a very natural emotion of PL’s, I think a majority of people whether they realise it’s related to PL or not, yearn for that place/life before.

    In fact when I was your age I experienced something similar, and still til this day I don’t really talk about PL with my family. I actually found a local ‘Psychic’ (I don’t think she’s actually psychic) but she did past life regressions and the sorts, so I saved a little and saw her not that it succumb to much but maybe something similar would help you out a lot seeing your past lives are quite prevalent?

    It seems as though you don’t want to do past life regression at home, whys that?

    I also agree you should take steps to balance your mental health, whether that’s to change your diet, visit places that make you happy and try and make peace with your past! X
     
  10. Vogue_1983.

    Vogue_1983. Senior Member

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    Hi there,the reason why I'm not comfortable with having my parents know about all of this (and thus having a regression at home)is probably because I'm already uncomfortable telling anyone I know about this really.Because most likely if I would tell anybody they would probably think there is something wrong with me,or think I just have a lively imagination.I just don't want people to look at me differently, especially since this peticulair past life may be viewed as bad to most people.It would probably become more clear why if I just told the details,because I just tend to describe my pl's verry vaguely on here.But as I mentioned I'm still not comfortable with that either (gosh how many times did I use the word comfortable on here lol)
     
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  11. Li-la

    Li-la Senior Member

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    I'm so sorry for your pain.

    Do you remember if you died suddenly, without expecting it? Some type of trauma, maybe?

    For me I have come to the conclusion that my death came so suddenly that I had no mental preparation for it. I left my kids when they were still just that. Everything up in the air. I did not know how the father would cope.

    I did not understand why I died. Why at home? Why was I not in a hospital? I was in bed at home. No one saw it coming. The heart just gave up on me. I feel guilt about that too. I had been taking pills before and brought pain to my family and most likely stressed my heart with my diets for years.

    My point is maybe part of the reason you hold on so tight is that it was a life that ended abruptly? Unfinished business?

    I have missed my other soul group all my life. I took distance from my own mother, who was loving but got hurt. I would not call her Mamma (Swedish) because I remembered having another Mama (Italian). Only I am connected to my soul group in this life. It was just that I died long before the other people in my soul group died in my past life. So one can say I have a split or I have two soul groups. I learned that I should not let the present people in my life pay just because they weren't the people from my past, because I missed them. I had to let them in my heart as well. Then I am someone nostalgic. It is like when you have been given birth. you later forget the pain. I saw everyone from the past life as perfect even though they were not, it was because I missed them so.

    Even so if you are not close with your family you are just 15 and you will most likely have a family of your own when you are an adult. Family does not need to be the stereotype idea of family either when I come to think of it. Close friends can feel like family, for instance. Either way you will have another family in your future.

    I hope you will feel better. When I was your age (a sentence I did not think I would write - where does the years go?) my teenage years were my most difficult ones. I was very sensitive: it took time before I found home, in my body and mind. Maybe because you are in this whirlwind of a teenage body you feel more and are more open. I did not realize this until my own teenage years had passed, looking back, though.

    Either way, please take care. You are loved, more so than you realize. Like they say - this too shall pass...

    Best Wishes
    Li La
     
    Last edited: Jul 18, 2019
  12. Vogue_1983.

    Vogue_1983. Senior Member

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    I just read this,and surprisingly, I recognize a lot of myself in this.You could say I died in a pretty dramatic way and left a lot of unfinished business behind.I shot myself due to a verry painfull situation and out of feelings of frustration and failure.I died a couple of years after the war of that same bullet.After I shot myself I was never the same and died as a stranger basically.As of unfinished bussines,there was someone in particular in that life I wanted to built a future with,but sadly when the war broke out that all suddenly went out of the window.I also just wish to let my family from back then know I'm not in that state anymore,and came back.:.(Maybe I should also imply why I dislike my current family so much.To begin with I naturally don't recognize them as my real family.But my current mom also is a narcissist,and at the moment my dad and her are thankfully in a divorce.And I say thankfully because she ruined most of me and my sister's childhood.In a couple of days she will go and live elsewhere,and in October my parents will go back to court to make the whole divorce official due to my mom not being there at the day it actually had to happen (she didn't forget about it ,she was fully aware of it ofc,due to her thinking she didn't do anything wrong.)
     
    Last edited: Jul 18, 2019
  13. Ophelia3

    Ophelia3 Senior Registered

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    A few questions, can you not do a past life regression at home in private without anyone knowing you’re doing one? Tape or YouTube walk through with headphones in at night?

    Also why don’t you just merely bring up the topic of past lives to your parents without insinuating that you have a past life, see what their thoughts are in reincarnation altogether, might make you feel more comfortable knowing where they stand in regards to reincarnation.

    I asked my parents, my mum believes more genetic memories and my dad is more convinced, fairly certain he had a past life as a German SS general during WWII lol!

    I think you’d be surprised by how many people are actually intrigued or interested in reincarnation!

    Do you live in a highly religious neighbourhood?

    Ophelia x
     
  14. Vogue_1983.

    Vogue_1983. Senior Member

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    That's actually a good idea,I heard about doing a regression that way,and never thought it was actually legit,but due to someone suggesting it now I may give it a try.Also my home situation isn't the best at the moment.My mom has various mental health issues and my parents are in the middle of a divorce (wich I don't mind too much since my mom is actually the one making it so hard for everyone else at home.)My dad isn't too bad,but I he never really seems to take me seriously if I talk about bigger topics.Maybe because of my age.
     
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  15. Ophelia3

    Ophelia3 Senior Registered

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    Ah I see. Probably a good idea to dissociate from the situation a bit and come back to it when it’s resolved further down the track. Concentrating on past life regression and healing those wounds from your past life might be just what you need at the moment, but be mindful and take it slow!

    I recommend doing those tapes when you get a chance, write it down, but meditate and take some time in between each session, because they can be overwhelming if you’ve had a particularly traumatic past!

    Ophelia x
     
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  16. Eva1942

    Eva1942 A Walking Enigma..

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    Whey hey! Well there’s something! SS generals (Obergruppenführer and above) kinda of died out after mid 1942...

    Vogue, I think that only you are the one who can forward with this. There is no one but yourself who knows your memories like you do. We can give advice until the cows come home, but we can’t do it for you or see your memories. I think that we all a ‘time’ in our lives when we “know” we are ready and capable to know about them.

    Eva x
     
  17. Ophelia3

    Ophelia3 Senior Registered

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    I don’t know all of the intricacies, I’ve never really been much interested in WWII nor have I ever pretended to be. *upside down smile*
     
  18. soulfreindly

    soulfreindly Senior Registered

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    That is just what I am coming to terms with .. ie how I was fantasizing my past life family would be better ..

    Even though I have remembered many other family scenarios, the last that I was killed young I wanted desperately to reunite with , So much that I ended up back in the same scenario of trauma and brutality in three successive lives afterwards> Each time being killed again young ..

    I then remember being as a ghost unable to move from that space but for the love of my twin sister saving me.. She guided me to this life where I was not close to my family but got to expecting it with who my parents were.. So I actually was probably born to the right family for me this life. I have suffered terribly with a chronic illness but that has given me teh time to explore my spiritual journey.>

    I remembered a life last week where I felt so much guilt for the death of my then family .. It brough home the depth of feeling parents have for the children even though they may not be close parents do have some connections always .. Then I decided to embrace my depression and allow myself to feel the difficulty of this life and how I did have a very hard time coming back.> And decided I need to change so that I would allow new people into my life. Take a chance on being hurt again And take a chance that I may hurt people again... Take a leap of faith and trust.. deciding that that suffering and work will pay off down the line.

    Vogue --Keep your heart to the silver lining in life and what you can glean from it ...
     
  19. KenJ

    KenJ Assistant Archivist and Moderator Staff Member Super Moderator

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    Vogue, do yourself and your Dad a favor, talk plainly to him about your knowing that he is up to his neck with emotional stuff right now, but that you need to talk about something of importance to you when he is more centered. I wish that my children had done that for us as it would have saved years of problems and hard feelings. You might even have to repeat it!

    As suggested above, ask your guides for help and protection. I found that if I thought of what I wanted to learn, the area of interest, and then tried to look upward at my "third eye"(which is a strain) and then try to relax, it helped to elicit my recalls.
     
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  20. Eva1942

    Eva1942 A Walking Enigma..

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    If I come across something and I am unsure of whether it will help me or not, I ask my guides whether it will serve me a purpose. Sometimes they tell me that it will not, other times they tell me to read it and find out for myself or sometimes they just yell “ja!!!!” (German for yes) at me.

    You get third eye strain too?! :eek: I thought it was just me...

    Eva x
     

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