My friend X

Discussion in 'Past Life Memories' started by tanguerra, Oct 3, 2007.

  1. Ljbellus

    Ljbellus Registered

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    Another song that helps me in times of sadness and longing. Thinking of you Tanguerra and hoping that you are well.
     
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  2. tanguerra

    tanguerra Administrator

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    X's birthday again today (would have been). Twice now since he's been dead. Funny feeling. A bit better than last year, but still not easy.

    Grief stricken all over again.
    3am in the morning. Can't sleep. Weepy.
    Upset and happy in a strange way.
    Only love.

    Light in my head
    You in my arms.. woo hoo hoo (and so on)


    Love. Only love.

    I miss him but I know it's temporary. A very funny feeling. Eternity.

     
    Last edited: May 5, 2017
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  3. Blueheart

    Blueheart Senior Member

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    Thinking of you. Better now, I hope?
     
  4. tanguerra

    tanguerra Administrator

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    I'm Ok. His birthday made me all sad again for a while is all. It happens.
     
  5. tanguerra

    tanguerra Administrator

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    I wrote this in the forum in 2009. It belongs here.
    The meaning of life - fiziwig

    "We hide our perfection from ourselves because that perfection is the very source of our boredom."


     
    Last edited: Jul 14, 2017
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  6. tanguerra

    tanguerra Administrator

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    It's very dull without him. That's for sure.
     
  7. KenJ

    KenJ Moderator Staff Member Super Moderator

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    Your comment fits with my thoughts yesterday!

    While relaxing last evening I recalled a forty-year-old dream I had during a particularly emotion-filled period of my life, one of those dreams that you know is important and full of meaning. The dream was presented as an explanation of “reality” in a right-brain manner. First a little background, this was three years after being “disabled” and had changed my accounting major to a dual major with psychology, I was volunteering at a Social Health Agency, trying to get my life together, trying to deal with my wife’s desire for me to leave her (advice she later said she got from an attorney), and having a woman (instructor of a class I was taking) profess love for me where I had no recollection of ever seeing or talking to her before – a pretty wild time (regrettably a time of my not being a good parent)!

    Since it was a right-brain message, it was very hard to describe. It was a vision of different colors moving together in a slowly flowing motion as if it was a thick oil with colors ranging from light-yellow-green to a dark green that was almost black (And, I’m red-green color-blind!). As this fluid, or as you called it, liquid metal, slowly moved, there were eddy-currents and faster-moving areas. Some of the eddy-currents just seemed to continuously rotate in one place without moving in the direction that the rest of it was moving (which was to my left and a little downward, if that makes any difference) while others did join in the flow. The currents split and some circled-back around the bottom as the colors blended (bands narrowed) giving the appearance that there was an objective to experience everything. I could not make heads or tails of it at the time. The only person I shared it with at the time was a seminary student classmate who was also volunteering at the Agency.

    I still do not understand the vision beyond recognizing that life has movement, although sometimes without progress, and that the mixing/blending, if it occurs at all, happens slowly. Perhaps the colors indicated “bright” and “dark” lifetimes, perhaps simply to represent “differences”, I don’t know.

    It’s perplexing to get such small glimpses of things when we are searching for answers as I was at that time. It is also strange that it remains in my memory forty years later. I wonder if I am caught-up in that small eddy-current or moving more rapidly toward the “objective” – then again, what difference does it make?
     
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  8. tanguerra

    tanguerra Administrator

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    Yes. Very much the same kind of thing. But X was silver and I was gold and it all made perfect sense at the time. I know what you mean.
     
  9. tanguerra

    tanguerra Administrator

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    Two years. Feels like yesterday

     
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