My past life kept changing her name

Discussion in 'Past Life Memories' started by Heather H, May 17, 2018.

  1. Heather H

    Heather H New Member

    Aug 4, 2017
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    I had this regression a while ago but recently I’ve been feeling more connected to her than ever so I thought I’d post about it to try and get some insight.
    I did a regression to your most recent past life but I was told during it by my past life that it wasn’t so clearly she felt she had to come through.
    It started in Russia, in a very rural northern part of it. It was before the revolution so the early 1900s. I was a young girl with auburn hair in braids and I had just gotten new boots for the winter. I loved them, they were beautiful and I felt so happy to have them. But my family were very poor and because they’d bought me these boots we didn’t have enough food. I had caught a fish at some point (I was only about 9/10 at this time) and I was keeping it as a sort of pet. We were so hungry that my mother cooked my pet fish and I was so angry with her about it.
    Then it skipped ahead to when I was older. I was about 17 and I remember thinking it was 1917. I could see a younger girl, about 14ish, who looked like me up ahead on a sleigh all wrapped up against the cold. She was my little sister and we were very close. She was very, very sick and a group of men were bringing her away to get better. I remember thinking that that was the last time I saw her and it always stuck with me that I didn’t say goodbye.
    I get lots of random information about who I was throughout this and it was weirdly detailed which I’ve never had before. I was Jewish and we lived in a small community. We were poor. My name was Vaya which is kind of an unusual name and I think it was a nickname because the ‘ya’ is common in Russian nicknames. But my last name was strange to me. It was Bulkarin or maybe Bulgarin but I couldn’t quite make it out. She even made a joke about the Bulgarin who was later executed in Stalin’s show trials ‘Not *that* Bulgarin!’ which was pretty weird.
    Anyway, I left my little town pretty soon after my sister left. Maybe it was something to do with the revolution on the horizon, I’m not sure. I could see a map of Europe and like a trail of where I went in the next few years. I went down through Moscow (again, weird decision, there was a revolution going on!), then out through most of Europe eventually landing in Germany. I believe it was Berlin I settled in for a while. I think this was a few years later for it was the early 1920s. I worked in theatre although I’m not sure as what. I think it was like chorus lines and backstage work. Eventually I met a man called Otto originally but who had changed his name to Arthur and we fell in love and were married. He was Jewish as well and a doctor so I felt like I had enough money to be comfortable, which I hadn’t been before. He loved me a lot, I remember that.
    We didn’t have any children yet because I was focused on my career. I wanted to be an actress. Eventually we moved through Europe some more, I think we were in Paris for a little while. Then we moved to America. New York, specifically.
    I’d changed my name again and I think I’d dyed my hair blonde and bobbed it which was very fashionable for the time. I have no idea what my married name was but I think we anglicised it or something because it was different to what it was originally.
    I actually became an actress in New York and Arthur worked in a hospital there too. We were very happy.
    I saw the map again but this time it was across America and the trail moved to a part in the southwest. I looked at a real map after the regression and realised it was New Mexico I was looking at.
    We moved there when we were old to retire. It was a nice house, I remember. Again, I felt very comfortable. I suppose it was important to me to have that security because I hadn’t had it as a child. No one would be eating my pets here!
    I died when I was in my 70s so in the 1970s. Arthur was out getting something from a shop nearby and I had a heart attack in my chair in the living room. He came back and found me already dead.
    Vaya- or whatever her name was- then spoke to me directly. She told me that she’d always felt awful that she never saw or heard from her family after she left Russia and that she missed them everyday. Then she told me to ‘make time’ and wouldn’t elaborate on it.
    Thinking back on it, the thing that bothers me about the whole regression is that Vaya Bulkarin doesn’t sound like a name that a Jewish girl from northern Russia would have. I’ve done research into Russian names and Bulkarin doesn’t even make sense. It would’ve been Bulkarina first of all and that’s not even a Jewish name because they tended to have the ‘sky’ suffix.
    I think perhaps she might’ve been simplifying her name for me or she changed it once she got to Moscow to something a bit posher sounding so that she could fit in. I also have a feeling she anglicised her first name once she got to America to something that sounded like Vaya. My immediate thought was Violet.
    I don’t really know why I’ve written all this down, I just find it interesting I suppose. In my own life now I’ve always been called by a nickname and I feel like it’s more my name than my actual one. I’ve also changed my name to my mother’s maiden name but I’ve never felt happy with it as it feels ‘clunky’ so perhaps that’s why Vaya and I are so connected.
    Anyway, if anyone here has any thoughts about this or if anyone knows something about Russian naming customs please let me know.
    fireflydancing likes this.

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