Past life lover in spirit?

Discussion in 'Past Life Memories' started by Shiriya, Jul 8, 2018.

  1. Shiriya

    Shiriya New Member

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    As I type this, I'm not exactly in my right frame of mind, but I thought I'd just get all of this off my chest to share a memory I saw through a dream possibly..correlating to a twin flame connection? At first I wasn't too sure about this as I'm a skeptic when it comes to stuff like this, but have had few close kindred souls point out it seemed like it and read some helpful articles helping me verify sensations I've felt sensing a certain, particular spirit of a man I knew since before incarnating in this life. Anyway, here's a written entry of what I remember since seeing it a few years ago. Pardon if it sounds a bit explicit at parts.

    Basically it took place in a dimly lit, japanese styled room which was small in size. The only light came from a single paper lamp in the furthest part of the room by the entrance. I'm pretty sure it was some room that I and the man I was with rented. I got the feeling we both were on the move or traveling,...I don't know. I saw through a woman's eyes in first person though saw how she looked through his eyes I believe. Strangely, she had light blue eyes even though she looked japanese, long silky black hair, pale skin, and wore a pink kimono with flower prints (forgot what flower it was though). Sitting across from me was the man I was with. He had much tanner skin compared to my pale complexion, had long back hair with front sides of his hair tied back with the rest down, sharp eyes, thick dark brows, and a beard. The man was clad in what appeared to be dark blue korean "warrior" attire but with a mix of japanese armor plating and wore a navy blue headband most korean guards did at the time. I don't know if I could describe his armor well aside from that. He was sitting against the wall from the opposite side across from where she sat, staring at her intently. I can recall how embarrassed and flustered she felt, even how hot and warm her face was trying to avoid staring back at him. Haha, she felt so shy she turned her head to the mat floor. Just before she could however, he quickly leaned in, lifting her chin up and kissed her. In that instant it felt like time stopped. Feeling their lips make contact, I felt her eyes widen and the initial shock she felt, shivers coursing throughout her body. I could even feel how the strands of his beard tickled her face. The dream shifted showing what happened a while after, where she lost her virginity to him but only saw a few glimpses of...well, for the lack of a better term the position the two situated themselves in.
    Strangely, I was only shown how his nose and waist down looked. Even in first person when he leaned in for the kiss, his face was a blurred out a tad but I could still make out some of his features...I wonder why. During times regressing, sometimes I'd hear something someone was saying then get muffled out so I assume I'm not supposed to see how he looked at the time in the memory. Sometimes thinking about this dream, I hear these in my head: "aitakute" or "aitai". ("I want to see you.", "I miss you." in japanese)

    I'm tearing up just thinking about how much and how long I've missed his touch. I don't know why I'm even getting like this, I feel ridiculous and crazy feeling this yearning even though I know I'm not alone with others going through the same thing...It just feels like my soul is searching for something that isn't here..at least in this world. It just makes me sad, even though I'm still young with many opportunities out there regarding love. I've been told by someone who claims they're a psychic empath that I'm lonely, and I think the strong feelings of this memory could be one of the main reasons why. I have a feeling that man's spirit has been watching over and visiting me sometimes letting me know he's there (which has been going on for a good 5 years since first finding out about past lives). I've been skeptical, but have felt his presence and warmth reassuring me with affection. During a dark time in my life trying to cope with feelings missing him, he even visited in a dream where I saw him staring at me with a very sad, worried look in his eyes before pulling me close for a deep kiss.

    God...I guess a part of me just couldn't handle or wanted to accept knowing I've reincarnated with him staying on the other side. I just feel so lonely here, even though life has been going well for me lately with some accomplishments made. Even while typing this, I received a glimpse of seeing that woman and the man gazing at each other upon stone steps leading up to some shrine or temple. At moments like this, I yearn for that time and to visit Japan. Whenever I feel the emotions the memory brings, I just feel helpless. I don't know how to cope with these feelings...
     
  2. Tinkerman

    Tinkerman Administrator Staff Member Super Moderator

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    Hello Shiriya, what a beautiful heartfelt post. Thank you for sharing it. I too came to this forum for very similar reasons, the haunting a powerful dream of a love from another time. And I too was very sad and lonely over it; that was almost fifteen years ago. So what have I learned in that time? Well, first I learned to never give up. Even when those in my close personal life tried to distract and dissuade me I hung on to the memory of this other soul. I studied everything I could on the twin soul theory. Many people, some on here, tried to dispel the twin soul concept, labeling it duality and other words that fit their need to belittle it. But I hung on, I was a believer! So I would say to you hang on to him, open your heart, soul, and mind to him. Synchronicity has a way of finding twin souls, look for them. I read a book by Patricia Jourdrey several years ago entitled Twin Souls, I remember really liking it, perhaps you might also.
    I wrote very similar words on this forum fifteen years ago. If your soul is reaching out into the world like this, there is a reason. I'll bet "it" is here... somewhere. I find great numinous joy in those days of sorrow and sadness, a paradox yes, but a lesson and an epic tale of great love. You may read my story if you like, it's back on the dusty shelves, it's simply called A Police Sergeant's Memory (I think), I'll go dig it up for you. Hopefully it will give you some glimpse of hope in that you are not alone.

    Blessings ~Tman
     
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  3. Shiriya

    Shiriya New Member

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    I'm curious, how did you keep holding on to this soul with distractions in your personal life? Do you mean you turned down opportunities having relationships with potential partners/people interested in you? And have you met that soul yet?

    And thank you so much for sharing your experience and giving much needed reassurance, Tinkerman! :D I'm so grateful knowing someone else on here has gone through the same! :( Every night I can't help cry while listening to songs that remind me of him, hell, I've even shedded tears not long ago. ...Do you really think there could be a reason...for souls like ours to feel this yearning even though everything in life is fine and dandy filled with many blessings? It really makes me wonder what that reason could be.

    I guess the only thing I can do is to try being open while working on myself. Still, it pains me his spirit is on the other side and well,..not physically here with me. He's watching over something for me until I "come back" after dying in this life. Maybe I should just...ugh I don't know,...should I still think of keeping myself open to him or move on? I really feel stuck and conflicted when it comes to thinking of this past love and the possibility of new relationships in this life, as I don't know what to do with these yearning feelings and never met anyone aside from you who experienced this. It could just be me overthinking and worrying and not looking at the bigger picture to simply be open to give a chance to believe, lol.
     
    Last edited: Jul 9, 2018
  4. Spirit Sword

    Spirit Sword Senior Registered

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    Perhaps there is a reason you were supposed to remember this. It might even be as simple as you needed to have a reason to chase down past life research.

    Maybe there was no reason. This might just be an unresolved part of your past that your soul is hanging onto. There may be ways to resolve this in this lifetime, or you might have to wait. I have waited over eight hundred years to reunite with an old lover. Waiting and yearning might just be a part of the cycle. But you are by no means alone.
     
  5. pariah_autist

    pariah_autist 1st life: gerbil

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    Perhaps your visions of this man are visions from the past life where you remember your souls related but you have yet to meet him in this life?

    I met a man I swear was in my most vivid past life dream, it was a completely random chance encounter when I was not expecting it, also in a time in my life when I was in turmoil over a recent situation that ended me suicidal in a mental hospital... It blew me away at the time and I was not mentally prepared to deal with it at all because of my past and mental illness... But the man had a healing effect on me with his touch in ways I cannot explain, but there was too much emotional/sexual tension, confusion and lack of communication, I could not handle... I "ran" from the situation and have not seen him in 4 years...

    Perhaps you will find this man so long as you keep the dream/visions in your convictions in your heart about him....
    Before with the dream, and after meeting this guy, I always kept my convictions about him, despite the meds I was put back on screwing up my heart and mind... However it seems the connection is lost and no closure... And remains a mystery... And seeking him out and chasing him would be wrong... Even obsessive or creepy of me.... This guy is alive, obligated to his own reality, and maybe doesn't even care about me anymore, as much as I did...Maybe he didn't even feel the way I did romantically for him, maybe he was just a really nice flirty guy and I made too many assumptions cause of my autism and couldn't just ask him why he was so flirty with me and why he said certain things.... Who knows....
    Just don't do what I did and blow your chances with keeping the connection... I blew my chance by not at least asking him to stay my friend and keep contact... And I blew it by not saying goodbye before I quit the job...
    I lost my connection because I am too mentally unstable and I did not deserve him.......

    I hope your past life dream guy when you do find him is single and available and accepting for the connection, and that the romantic connection is stable with good communications....

    On another note btw I also remember having a vague dream in a Japanese house in feudal era, that era and Japanese feudal culture resonates with me a lot too... I think perhaps I have been an outcast wanderer in many lives, looking for special soul mates to take me in from the cold...:)
     
  6. Shiriya

    Shiriya New Member

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    Thank you so much for your beautiful, heartfelt post. :D:p Perhaps...but who knows. I know that I don't know myself whether I may meet someone representing his spirit on the other side physically here or if I never will in this life, so the only thing I can do is..well, just keep doing my own thing while hanging on to the one memory of him.

    I'm sure if he flirted with you, it's plausible he's felt something for you too. And you never know, Pariah! It's still never too late in life because just maybe, you'll stumble upon him again in the future. There was a reason you both met in this life and are still alive breathing, afterall. If your soul still yearns for him, I suggest you try getting back in touch with him if you know any means to.

    And aww...thank you so much. *Hugs* I can only hope, haha. But for now will work on my own life til then...if he is out there.

    Oh really? I'm curious to know more about what you saw! :D It's so fascinating meeting those who lived in the same country as you especially during those traditional, feudal times.
     
  7. Shiriya

    Shiriya New Member

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    I can see that. It's odd, whenever I'd try regressing I feel something may be blocking me from looking any further into the memory. But it could possibly be myself needing to get in the swing of regressing after a long hiatus. And yes, that's true....Thank you for your reassurance, Spirit Sword. <3

    I'll just have to try again and see if I receive anything regarding that life.
     

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