Quilt over past life death

Discussion in 'Reincarnation Questions' started by Li. La., Feb 10, 2019.

  1. Li. La.

    Li. La. Senior Member

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    Hello,

    I've been written earlier about experiencing a past life as "Laura", a girl probably born into the Mormon religion.

    In past life meditations and dreams I have experienced the death of her first husband. He was a ranch owner and was in WW1 and returned from the war with an injury. It is his death that is now causing me to feel quilt and I have difficulty moving on.

    Please let me just share the background story to what led up to this:
    During the war there was a break up, my husband left me because he wanted me back home where he felt I would be safe - and not working as a form of sister or nurse in potential danger. He did not understand that I was on a mission and part of a group and could not just return home just because he told me to. He broke my heart when he left me like that.

    During our time apart since he had left me I became close with another soldier and we fell in love. I received a letter from the soldier before the news came of his death in battle. I kept that letter.

    At some point after that my husband reached out to me. I received bunch of letters all saying pretty much the same thing. He wanted me back. We reconciled and went home to live on the ranch. We had a baby boy, but he died very young. Before that - before the war even I think - we had a baby girl but she was born premature. She was buried on our land.

    My husband had had another tragedy happening before we met. He lost his first wife whilst traveling. One time when he had high fever he talked about wanting to find her; find where she was buried but he couldn't. It haunted him that she was buried there all alone. I think she died from blood poisoning.

    I took the loss of the children very bad and it made me turn my back on my Mormon faith for a while. There was this moment when I thought of cutting my wrists with a knife; when my husband sneaked up on me, got hold of the knife and threw it aside. My husband wanted more children, but I was afraid to become pregnant again - to have a child and then to loose it. I rejected him and he let me be. I thought it would give him reason enough to divorce me, but he didn't. I think he thought that with time I would change my mind and feel better.

    One evening my husband found the letter the soldier had written me. I had kept it in our home, in secret. My husband had never known of the true nature of the relationship but it became evident to him after reading the letter. Even though years had passed he became enraged. I had made it right in my head before on keeping the letter - because my husband had kept a photograph of his first wife. He never talked otherwise of his dead wife and I never talked about the soldier.

    During the fight he got hold of my arm. I was pushed to the wall. He kept a fist close to my face talking about what he wanted to do to the soldier and if I was a man. I got hold of his fist and bit real hard. He dragged me out to the stall where the horses were kept. Said something about horses that bite and that I was a horse then. He took a rope around my wrists and got me trapped to the wall. Then he walked out. I feared he would return with a horse whip that he had used earlier on a horse to hit me with. He didn't. When he returned he had calmed down and untied me. Then in the middle of the night I got up as he was asleep, got my dress and shoes and sneaked out into the night. I headed for the stall to get to a horse to get me out of there.

    I lived with a family that had a friend or relative, a man, who was a frequent visitor. One time as I was serving them food he caught a glimpse of the marks around my wrists (after the rope in the stall). I pretended as if it was not shown and he did not comment on it. We all sat down to eat.

    One time, in the same quite small dining room my estranged husband came to visit. He was dressed up in formal clothing, as well was I. Neither of us looked like we used to look in our every day life on the ranch. Things started out civilized but I was afraid of him and could not bare the thought of returning home to the ranch. I called it "the house of death". We talked of divorce and he said that the shame would be more on me than on him. Instead he suggested that we would see each other now and then. He had before come from a home where he protected his mother and siblings from a father who was violent. In time he was most likely seen as a threat to the father and was thrown out. As a youngster he had gotten in trouble and got jailed for a time. This was all in the past and he gave thanks to a person who was a Mormon who had helped turn his life around when he had had nowhere to go. Before in our past he had then promised, very early on, that he would never lay a hand on me. My husband wanted us to reconcile. That in time I would feel different.

    So that was the background. Then I remember returning to the ranch. A man drove the carriage. Possibly the man who was the frequent visitor from before. The sight of my husband being hanged in a tree outside the house devastated me. I never saw the man who was with me cut him down.

    There was a head injury in the back of my husband's lifeless body. At the time it was thought that he got it after the man got down his body and the head hit the ground at some point.

    Then I remember leaving by boat and the frequent visitor saw me off, but looked serious and at the sight of him I left where people were waving about and got further into the boat. I did not wave nor smile to him. I had a bitter taste in my mouth.

    Before that there was talk that the Mormon people, friends, tried to convince me to marry this man because it was unsafe for me to go out on a mission alone and to travel alone. I did not want to. One time to just see the expression of his face I could hardly retain the bitter tone of my voice when I said that my husband had not been dead for a year even. I think I was looking for some kind of response in his eyes.

    Thoughts of what had really happened to my husband would not leave me alone, just like it is not leaving me alone now. I think it is possible that he was hit in the back of his head by the man who was the frequent visitor and who came with me back to the ranch. I know it is perhaps just a strong feeling, but yet I can't get rid of it. If he was hit in the back of the head it could have happened because he got into a fight with the frequent visitor or perhaps most likely was surprised being attacked from behind. The reason I think the frequent visitor could have done this is because he got the image that I was a battered wife and was on my way to reconcile with my husband; whilst he perhaps had a plan on his own. Also it could very well have been that the frequent visitor was totally innocent and I just had difficulty accepting my husband's suicide.

    What is worse is that the husband fits into the description my young daughter has given multiple times about seeing a ghost, as well as a certain smell that I relate to the ghost and to my pl husband. This ghost has visited me for years and years. It is only recent time when I have connected him to have been the pl husband.

    I just don't know what to do. I would really appreciate your thoughts on this. Thank you.

    Best Wishes
    Li La
     
  2. Kenz1010

    Kenz1010 Senior Registered

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    Hi Li La,

    Thanks for going into detail and for sharing that. Some past life memories don’t come easy, that’s for sure. I can’t quite remember, but doesn’t this “ghost” you speak of have some very negative energy? A darker entity? If so, maybe try saging your house. That probably sounds idiotic but it may help. I can’t say with 100% certainty that it’s the most effective thing to do, but I’ve done it in the past because of a darker presence and after that it seemed to “solve the problem”.

    As for my thoughts on what you’ve written, I think it’s a complicated thing. The fact that you don’t know exactly what happened to your husband is probably distressing. But in my opinion, it would be best to try and come to terms with this pain you carry, not to try and figure out/ wonder what happened exactly. It really is in the past now, and unfortunately you can’t change what happened. That’s why I think the best option is to try and move on, to move forward. It’s definitely not an easy thing to do at times, hell, sometimes I can’t even do it. But I think over time we’ll all be able to heal from past life “wounds”, and will learn from them. I’m sorry this recollection has been so stressful for you, I’d imagine it would be. But I hope you can move through this rough patch and that more positive things transpire for you in the near future.
     
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  3. AlexD

    AlexD aka Shadow

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    Hi, I don't mean to derail the topic from its original point, but I'd like to ask an opinion on the matter. Do you think that ghosts are in fact the souls of the dead, or that they could be their residual energy manifesting physically and taking their form?
    I've recently lost a relative and my family has been hearing noises and objects moving on their own since he passed, while I was back in my parents's home I could hear them too. So I was just wondering if we are dealing with the real ones or just an echo of their energy, while their consciousness has already moved on.
     
  4. Li. La.

    Li. La. Senior Member

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    Thank you so much for trying to help me. You have wise thoughts and I think you're right. I will try to shape up and do that, at this point I am just sentimental I suppose. I would never have thought that past life would give me so many experiences in detail, it certainly did not start out that way. I think also I pushed myself too hard. Yes, I have felt frighten of the ghost since it is quite aggressive but then again he has never physically hurt us which I actually think he would be capable of doing if he wanted to. There is some perhaps question about that as well: One time I was going down the stairs and felt as if I was being suddenly pushed on my back quite violently to then suddenly being drawn back. It almost felt as if it was two people doing this to me, I can't explain it. One wanted me to tumble down the stairs, the other wanted me to stand straight up and not fall. Then the noise started again - of porcelain breaking, things being thrown etc, etc. If I got this right the pl husband was someone who survived on his anger. It was his technique, a typical trade in his personality. He was not particularly fond of other people, was kind of suspicious but I blamed his background for this. He did not step back for any authority, he was the authority kind off - that was the attitude. If I got this right the man whom I think could possible have killed him had been there before asking to take some clothes and things that I wanted. My husband refused. Said I should pick it up myself then if I now found it necessary. When ever I have remembered sitting in an open carriage it has been this or that man driving it. I don't know why really. Maybe it was not safe for a girl and woman to drive it one self; to go there one self. So my thoughts have been that maybe the husband was injured and killed on the first visit that the man made to him - originally just to get my clothes. I don't know. I hope the husband never thought I was into the other man; I wasn't. That I planned for this to haven happened to him. It just seems so off the map that he would kill himself - I thought his anger would stop him. When I have had the experience of leaving on the boat I out of the blue heard this strange thought/noise came to me that said - when I saw the man looking up at me from the boat "killed me". Typically I did not hear "He killed me" or "You killed me". Just "Killed me". And now if I am right in my assumption the pl husband is still here, now and then as a form of ghost. I will buy what you advised me to, it is worth a shot. Still I have seen the good in this pl husband as well and a part of me wants to help him even though another part is really angry with him for frightening my young daughter. Thanks once more :)
     
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  5. Li. La.

    Li. La. Senior Member

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    Hi, it's alright. I wonder that myself actually. All I know is that the loved ones I have on the other side has not frighten me. I have felt them touch me like they used to do when they were alive and I have heard radio being turned on by itself and playing a specific tone that one of my loved ones knew was important to me, a rare song. I have actually seen the fattest dove outside my kitchen, have not seen one before nor after and am surprised it could even fly to get there. It refused to move and looked at me and followed me with it's eyes. The thing is I had lost a loved one that fought overweight at the time of the death and had a wicked sense of humor. I can't help but think that dove was send as a message. I have heard steps but also from an animal that had died going about its usual self. I was not the only one hearing it. It happened on a frequent basis. I don't know the answers to your questions but I find them very interesting. Hopefully someone on this forum can answer :) thank you for taking the time to read my thread.
     
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  6. Kenz1010

    Kenz1010 Senior Registered

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    Well, it sounds like even in the past you were wondering how he died. That “killed me” you heard could have been your husband, but I guess there’s no way of knowing for sure as of yet. It’s interesting to read your experience with feeling as if you were being pushed forward and then backwards. Must have been a strange feeling. & yes, try the sage if you can. It could help, I think. Another thing, maybe try talking to the presence in your house? That probably sounds odd, but I think if you tell him that you never liked this man, and that you were never intending to hurt him in that way (and other ways for that matter), maybe he’ll back down. He could be carrying pain in the afterlife from that time. Anyway, that’s just a thought.
     
  7. Li. La.

    Li. La. Senior Member

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    Hi, just wanted to update what has happened since and ask for advice (please).

    I had prior told the pl husband and/or ghost to try to contact me whilst I am dreaming or am under pl regression meditation (thinking I am in a calm place - and am then like dreaming) to see if he wants to tell me something.

    So I have been dreaming and receiving short like scenes or images from that life as Laura. One was just the three of us - the pl husband, me as Laura and last but not least the little boy. Our carriage looked by then a bit different from where one sat; it was sort of lifted and just done different. The boy sat in the middle of us and we had a good time whilst going somewhere. I would put my hand on the boys back as we were going and sometimes in front as well on his tummy; just so he would be comfortable and not tip toe forward when my husband stopped the horse or something. Just, I suppose, every day life memories.

    One night as I was dreaming some nights ago - with a sudden fever - I saw things from being in a large tunnel. I have always been claustrophobic - don't like tubes or knowing I am trapped somewhere. This tunnel was not so narrow. The sides and the roof was in a gray tone and the floor was more white. Then it was the classic thing I suppose - there was a pleasant light from way, way in front of me. "In the way" of this light was a man figure holding a child's hand. The man was limping every so slight. So they were walking towards me. I was walking towards them. I felt overwhelming love for them and could feel their love and joy for me, it was as if the little boy wanted to run but accepted walking beside the man. I looked to the man's other side and thought - but could not quite see because they were still so far away - that there was this little "package" there; as if he was carrying an infant, wrapped up in a blanket on the side where his leg was limping a bit as he walked. I woke up from this dream and realized tears were running down my cheeks.

    I thought to myself that either this was just a dream, or it was perhaps the actual memory that Laura had had when she passed over - that she saw her old family greeting her. So I felt peace. I thought: Oh, it is over now. He is not lost, he is in the light. He has let me know perhaps that now he feels his story has been told. And so now there is peace. Now he has left.

    Instead I would see in the back eye of my corner from that day and days afterwards, like on the side, that fast sweeping black shadow or someone watching you - but when you try to catch it with your eyes it starts to move and is gone. I've had this for years and years basically, properly as long as I can remember. I thought everyone had it like this - that one's eyes "trick you". Or that one can at times feel "watched" but there is no one there. I never felt frighten by this that I can recall. It was not until a friend of mine finally said she could not take it anymore - that what was it that kept being drawn to me; each time she tried to look real fast - it moved away so quickly. She felt it was a man and that he was kind of dominant, she felt uncomfortable. That was the first time I thought that maybe there was something "spooky" about it.

    Only this time after my dream - I not only see this happening - as a tall figure - but I see a small one. Around the same height as my 3 draw bureau. Also the same height as a child. So now I'm thinking - could this really be?? It's mad, right?

    Did my dream really happen? Did my pl husband bring our pl son into this reality instead? Can the "tunnel" be used for "reversal" reason instead of just being drawn to it and entering the other side/heaven? Has something like this happened to someone else? Please, please share.

    If I remember things right we (in our pl) were at one point all sick with fever. I think my husband was the first one to get it. One minute our son was in bed with me sleeping. Another when I woke up the child was gone. There was this highly uncomfortable silence. My husband was not in bed. That was when I got up. I will never forget the silence as I walked. Then as I was to enter a room my husband kind of threw himself - in the way - for me to enter this room. Then, still, I was in the tumult able to see over his shoulder. Then I screamed. It was not a normal cry. It was like I could tell there was something - or someone - in this other room - but I couldn't see it, it was too dizzy. If I am right I think the boy's body was laid on it's back on a table. Then I awoken from it. So I don't know if this is just fabrication or if the boy died of this disease or if he died from an accident. Somehow it was as if my husband felt responsible for his death, but that could be that he would watch over the baby, sit by the end of our bed and watch him as he was asleep and tell me I could go to sleep. Not that I think I am dying this time around - but my fever came right about the time of the dream. It has come and go and I usually never have fever, but it is also February and cold outside so I mean - this could all be for natural reasons.

    There has been no high noises or breaking of things after the dream. Only two toys that has sounded on their own despite me putting them on the off buttons. I have shown these two toys to both my child and husband - and they say I do it right - when I push them to the off button; they are not suppose to make sounds. Both toys are children's toy guns, made of plastic. I have heard things but there are small noises and not done in anger and it usually is from my daughter's room and/or close by from where I am. It could be anything really, I am not saying it has to be ghosts creating this, it is just a bit of different sounds, lighter, kind of.

    I don't understand if they are here what it is that is so funny being here - I would have chosen heaven for sure.

    I have not been able to buy the sage yet. I have watched some videos on you tube and some ghosts get mad when one start to do this, so now I am like afraid to do it on my own - or should I perhaps still give it a go? What do you think? Am thinking perhaps the little boy will feel rejected and in feeling that way his father will be very cross with me (his temper in his pl frighten me). The rage I felt from my pl husband as he dragged me into the stall and put the rope on me and left - was insane. I have never had anyone been that raging mad at me. The anxiety I felt being trapped like that for God knows how long was actually terrifying. In retrospect thinking he did not come after me helps of course, but I still sometime get the same feeling.
    Also they stated on the program I watched that if one was "bad" in life - with a temper for instance - one gets 3 times bad as a ghost:eek:. Also I definitely don't want to hurt their feelings.

    What worries me a bit is that each time I caught a glimpse of someone watching or rushing by it is of dark, dark or black shadow kind of thing. When I have once seen this grown up figure come alive in the middle of the night years ago when my daughter was an infant it was of gray. Then I was really frightening and super-angry in a protective way at once. According to some ghost program on you tube the darker the "shadows" are the more evil they are. So I'm like OK...but how can a small ghost-child be evil?

    Would love some thoughts on what to do now?

    Best wishes

    Li La
     
    Last edited: Feb 16, 2019
  8. AlexD

    AlexD aka Shadow

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    Hi again. As upsetting as such phenomena may appear there is no real reason to be afraid. I know by experience that when they actually happen and they are not just "tricks of the eyes" they can be perceived by just everyone. People react in different ways, I have a friend who would get frightened and lose her sleep just at the thought. My family and I are used to such phenomena since we have witnessed them intermittently for many years. I don't know exactly why, perhaps there is a lot of residual energy in the place where my former home was built, or maybe it could be because my bloodline has a history of psychics. As a child I remember finding oily traces on personal objects without an idea of how they could get there, I even remember being frustrated at such phenomena for getting my stuff dirty with the mysterious substance. In more than one period in my life I found myself switching to an inverted circadian rhythm and in the night I happened to see dark shadows rushing around me. As dark as they could appear I never received harm from those.
    As I said a close relative passed away a few weeks ago and my family and I (while I was in my former home) heard the distinctive sound of the office chair (the one with little wheels) running around the whole floor. I heard it first, then my father a week after. We just thought it was normal after all. Just yesterday my aunt found one of her purses literally flooded with that oily substance (the purse only contained dry objects). We just accept these phenomena as part of our daily lives.

    I do not exclude that sometimes it could be possible for deceased people to communicate with the living. It has happened to me a couple of times in dreams. What I am not entirely sure about is whether all these phenomena are caused by the dead themselves, as by their consciousness, or simply by residuals of their vital energy remaining attached to the fabric of reality. As their residual energy interacts with our own consciousness it could manifest in such ways. But in that case it could probably mean that the souls have already gone into the light and possibly reincarnated, while what we witness is an echo reverberating into physical reality.

    P.S.: TV most often exaggerates or invents things for the sake of audience. I don't believe programs or self proclaimed experts, I just believe my experience.
     
    Last edited: Feb 16, 2019
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  9. Li. La.

    Li. La. Senior Member

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    Hi AlexD!

    Thank you for your story. I'm sorry you lost someone in your family.

    I think about right now I will pray (although I don't know how...but thinking I'm just gonna do this my way) and ask for help on the other side to take the "shadow" people to the other side, and see if that helps. This because I have recently been awoken by this very close to my left ear scream - as if a little child was screaming out of fear and one can't really tell if it is a boy or a girl doing that or what age. I jumped out of bed calling for my daughter - because I thought it came from her but she was relaxed, watching television downstairs and did not know what I was talking about. It was too close to have come from outside and I know I wasn't dreaming it.

    Like you I also wonder what one is dealing with here - if the shadow people are real ghosts, spirits, astral shells or something else.

    Hopefully praying will do the trick :)
     
  10. SeaAndSky

    SeaAndSky Senior Registered

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    Hi Li La,

    I agree with the need for prayer. I also think it is good to find appropriate Bible verses that you can hold onto for reassurance, renewal and refreshment. I especially like the 23rd Psalm, and often recite it when things are bad or there is a special source of concern. It can be broken down into sections, so I also sometimes just focus on the sections that are most pertinent to my current need. These I repeat and often find great comfort, remembering the times when God has done just what is recited there for me in the past, often after fervent prayer. It is really a wonderful resource.

    In terms of your current ghost issues, it is difficult to know whether you are dealing with the spirit of a deceased husband or something else taking advantage of the left-over grief and anger from that lifetime to work mischief. On the thought that it is your deceased husband, I think that something that I read somewhere might be helpful. It seems that one of the big problems some spirits have in letting go is wanting to be understood and wanting the truth to come out. Likewise, they may have wrong impressions that need to be corrected. Forgiveness--in both directions--may also be needed. In these regards, there are a variety of issues to be thinking about. First, you should try to understand why various actions of Laura's were so upsetting to her husband. In particular, many men are sustained through the rigors of war knowing that their loved ones are safe back at home. When Laura stepped into the theater of war, she gave him something additional to worry about as well as taking away one of his sources of comfort. Likewise, in that day and age, he probably also saw this as a sign of Laura's disrespect for him. Second, the concern he had over these things was compounded by thoughts and concerns about Laura's possible infidelity. Third, it is quite possible that he was murdered, and the thought that others think he committed suicide would be a special burden to him. In this regard, because of the situation and his prior concerns about Laura's fidelity, he may even have thought that you "were in on it". So, there is really a lot of ammunition here for a troubled spirit.

    You have asked for suggestions and mentioned prayer, so I will be more frank and say that I think you should pray and ask for help in this matter from the Highest. Explain the problems and concerns you have about this in prayer and ask for help for all of them. Is it a problem with a long ago husband? Ask for help in resolving this. Is it something else? Acknowledge that you don't know what is going on and ask for help, inspiration and protection. Most especially, it is not too late to acknowledge any mistakes that you may have made as Laura and to ask forgiveness not only from Laura's husband, but from the Source of Power and Love that rules the universe. Love is very powerful, and will often find a way, especially when joined to humility.

    Cordially,
    S&S

    PS--I'm trying to be as elusive as I can in some respects. The moderators are very strict about anything that sounds "religious" unless it is posted in the Reincarnation, Religion and Spirituality section. But since you have asked for help and mentioned prayer, I am hoping they will let this one slip.
     
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  11. Li. La.

    Li. La. Senior Member

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    Hi S&S!

    Thank you so much for your advice, I will try to do my best :)

    Best Wishes
    Li La
     
  12. Li. La.

    Li. La. Senior Member

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    Hi, again Alex D. I've watched a documentary where one man stated that as a little boy there was "shadow" people coming alive in the nights; seemed to come from a portal somewhere in his room. They kept walking forth and back and even socializing with one another, when the boy tried to point them out to his dad - his dad could not see them. Then they would be gone only to do the same thing the following night. When this boy grew up and was later as a grown man on a work mission back to the house his family had once lived he came to talk to the present owner who by chance told him they were moving. Why? he asked. This was when the man explained to him that his daughter had complained of all the shadow people keeping her up at night. To the old boy/man this was finally the validation that when he had experienced as a young boy had actually happened. They never did anything to him, just seemed to be in a world of their own. One time a lady just stopped to watch him pretty much the way a mother looks over her sleeping child to see if he was OK. . I'm just thinking maybe that is what is in your family home? Portal or portals? Just wanted to share. :)
    My personal view right up to this point is that sometimes they can be no harm, but other times they can.

    Best Wishes
    Li La
     
  13. Li. La.

    Li. La. Senior Member

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    Hi, just wanted to update. Perhaps it is too early. I will see how it goes. So far what I found was a bit peculiar was one time after I had prayed alone in a room and then as I went outside, right outside my room, by the earlier closed door there was a small rope that had been cut. I can't remember it being there earlier. Just on the floor. Could just be coincidence but I don't think I have ever seen it before nor knows where it came from. Maybe it is too poetic to think it is a symbol of someone cutting loose the little boy's hands, just like Laura's hands had once been tied up during an unreal - terrible - fight with her husband. If things stay calm though I would like to rest in that comfort. I hope they have brought him back to the other side.
     
    Last edited: Feb 19, 2019
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  14. Li. La.

    Li. La. Senior Member

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    And here's an update regarding the pl husband.

    Since I have tried that we would communicate through dreams and during pl regression meditation instead it is difficult to say what is real here or just dreams. I've also had fever (the only one in the family and I usually never have fever). Whilst this was going on I would have vivid dreams, not nightmares (like one can have if one has fever), of Laura's life.

    I have tried to communicate Laura's genuine love for him and to apologize or explain why I did what I did. I know all of this sounds just crazy.

    What came to me was old bitterness from his perspective. There was one time when I could truly feel his insane rage. Also another I felt his love.

    If I got this right he does not remember that he killed himself. He pointed the finger to the frequent visitor.

    The husband felt also that Laura could be in danger due to the killer. In that aspect it actually felt as if he was looking out for me, even though he was angry himself with me at the same time. So I don't know if the ghost of the killer has been here too or if it is just something that was believed to have been a threat in the past??

    Also during the bad fight that led to the separation it has in retrospect become clear to me that the husband thought it was a high possibility that their son was not theirs, but Laura's and the soldier's (who had died). When that came up I could completely understand his rage. I have way too few memories to say if he was right or wrong in his suspicion. I don't remember that it would have been the case.

    All I could do was to apologize for the pain I have given him which was not my intention. So far I have not yet seen more shadow people. So I'm hoping for the best.
     
    Last edited: Feb 20, 2019
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  15. SeaAndSky

    SeaAndSky Senior Registered

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    Hi Li La,

    Please keep us posted. It seems like you are making progress, but your PL ex still seems to be a long way from giving up his haunting, though he is apparently becoming much milder. I think your heart-felt apologies as well as your acceptance of his belief that he was killed rather than committing suicide is going to be very helpful to him in letting go. However, the "protective" aspect is also something that will need to be moderated somehow. Keep praying and asking for guidance and forgiveness. Encourage him to pray for these same things as well if you can. You were not the only one at fault. You need to let him know how things were from your side as well (especially how he frightened you), but gently and lovingly. You were both praying people and you were part of a praying people in that PL. This was certainly something that was not driven out of you by your lifetime as Anna, in fact, I think it is far too deeply ingrained in you by this time to be easily obliterated (even by this modern era). These are your roots and his as well. I think he needs to also seek forgiveness not just from you, but from his own "higher authority". Remind him that bitterness and rage are not from God, who is a God of love and reconciliation. He has not, apparently, moved on from that lifetime, so these are the types of things he will know and remember with your encouragement.

    You are starting to dissipate his anger and concern about being thought a suicide. So, it seems like a good idea to keep doing what is working for you. At some point, when he has also gotten over his fear for you, I think he will be ready to move on. Besides, as he really seems to love you, I think he will realize that it is the best thing for you and him as well at this point.

    Cordially,
    S&S

    PS--Please have your fever checked if it does not go away. I have had a very frightening experience with that in my family.
     
    Li. La. likes this.
  16. Li. La.

    Li. La. Senior Member

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    Hi, my fever is gone and so is the flu but I am still coughing away...luckily the fever stopped at last. Thanks, S & S for caring, how awful that your family had that experience

    Well, to try to do an update I have had much less happening to the point that I have thought they have all gone now but then just few things has happened to make me think, maybe not? My friend who was adamant that she saw "him" around me will be visiting quite soon so I figure I could ask her at the end of the evening if she has noticed anything.

    I think one thing that I did that might have made things worse was that I was sort of stuck within the terrible scenes at the end of the marriage. So I think I was unintentionally whipping up a kind of energy, replaying a scene or scenes that could have echoed back to the spirit world or astral world or...what ever I should now call it. So I knew I had to get help to close these doors and have prayed and forced myself as much as I could to do that. Because the more I was stuck the harder it was to get out of it, and the more frighten I got - the stronger the fear grew. I had to remind myself again and again that he did not return to the stall to physically hurt or kill me. That he untied me instead after having calmed down. Maybe our son was still with us - as a ghost-child-but that is just a thought and got frighten by everything that went on.

    I think perhaps that this is what is happening at some places that are so called haunted. That the memories of something terrible that has happened gets replayed, and the more it replays the stronger it gets in energy.

    So right now I am hoping for the best with the doors closed :)

    Best Wishes
    Li La
     
    Last edited: Feb 28, 2019
  17. Li. La.

    Li. La. Senior Member

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    Hi!
    Just wanted to add a link that I think is a good one:
    https://foreverconscious.com/communicate-spirits-safely

    Also I have some questions...

    I have learned now through meditation that I at times not only am opening doors to the past - to remember past lives - but also make myself more visible, I think, to the spirit world for communication - or they just spot me, somehow? I have a theory that this can also happen when one has fever, I don't know if others has experienced that? (It is either that or my imagination...)

    Some of my experiences are totally strange and I would like to know if others has experienced something like it? It is like one scene is being played over and over again; from my perspective, then through the first husband's perspective, and then - the third - someone else's perspective; almost like a camera a bit far off. I don't know what this is? Has this happened to someone else during meditation, fever, flashbacks etc? Or is this just my imagination playing tricks on me? The scene was traumatic; so it is basically explosive with emotions and one is fearing the ultimate explosion of it - that it is just gonna get worse and worse. It is the scene that led to Laura and her husband separating, an ugly fight, at home on the ranch that held so many unhappy memories already (they lost their children, Laura suffered from depression I think at one stage after the loss of her little boy, trying to take her own life but her husband stopped her, her husband having bad memories from the war, living with an injury, and drinking a lot).

    I have done cleansing, using prayers and white light protection, avoiding meditation and for some time now I have not experienced anything ghostly, but then the other day, surprisingly, very close to me all of a sudden whilst I was reading something stood a rather tall figure, very dark, as if he was reading over my shoulder as well. Then he disappeared. His head was kind of bent down and close to the side of my head. He had the same length as Laura's first husband and also figure like but I could not see him as anything else besides dark shadow of a figure. If it hadn't been so unnatural it would actually have been a bit cute, like the ghost was interested to read too. I don't know if it was the first husband or someone else or imagination; but it stood so close to me that I just froze. I am used to the dark shadows being seen moving fast or existing in one place a bit far off me, not that close or solid. I did not feel any anger from him.

    The last sound I heard of the "ghost-child" was the sound of a child on the floor, in the bathroom, drawing on paper, like back and forth. I was so surprised when that happened, my daughter was nowhere near the bathroom nor doing drawings.

    All my prayers has been devoted mostly to getting this ghost-child to safety, to the other side, and I have asked for all kind of help; for good spirit to come and take the ghost-child with them. I have asked for the loved ones I have had in this life that has passed over knowing they were very protective of children and very stubborn too. I have asked angels etc. I have done all kinds of praying, and explaining the situation.

    Almost all my energy has gone into this - it was primal to me in all this mess that no ghost-child should be in our world, afraid (which I think the ghost-child was when hearing that sudden scream). I think also because I did not want the ghost-child in the middle of a mess if I was to start to try to communicate with Laura's ghost-husband whom I think carried a great deal of anger within him.

    When reading all this I realize how very crazy all of this sounds, and I do apologize. I never thought I would have these kind of experiences. I'm like afraid to talk about it to some people who would think I had mentally just lost it; hearing and seeing things not from this world, that aren't real.

    Hopefully I will have some answers from you, of your own experiences or suggestions?

    Thank you for reading this! :)

    /Li La
     
    Last edited: Mar 6, 2019

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