Hi all. I have untreated chronic PTSD from my life and past lives journey. I find it intolerable most of the time, the nightmares, the intrusive thoughts, the flashbacks etc. I find every human interaction to be a struggle and all of my fears have been magnified to an unbearable degree. I feel set apart from humanity. I feel like I will never be fully a part of life again. I self medicate to get away from my trauma so basically I'm turning into a fat drunk on top of it. I've mentioned it before, but the most intense PTSD experience I've had was when a woman who looked just like my old love sat two feet from me at a tram stop. She triggered me as soon as we broke eye contact. She was initially dismissive of my gaze like beautiful women tend to be with male attention. They are well used to it. As soon as she broke eye contact my flashback started. I think I said "I went to war for a woman like that" out loud because during the flashback the lady was facing me, not looking away like she had been previously. I stared at her, only seeing my old love. I relived the machinations of my mind as I fought to protect her. I relived my risking a bullet for her. I looked away and briefly came out of the flashback. Then I looked back and saw my old loves beautiful face and lucious dark hair. My rage at her sociopathic husband burst out of me and I relived breaking a sociopath to gain information on them. I relived the softening of my viewpoint as I realised what sociopaths actually are and the decision myself and others made to cover our tracks. Then I relived being utterly powerless in the face of true evil, I was stunned. I looked away again and somberly nodding my head I most likely said "combating evil creates evil". Then I had a " Huh!?" moment as I realised I was the greatest hero in Irish history and that meant that I was screwed. I relived the vision I had of spiralling towards hell and I looked back to the lady, feeling crippling guilt over bloody Sunday 1920 and overwhelmed by the trauma of Easter week 1916. I was embarrassed and ashamed. Then I looked away again and felt the weight of a millennia of conflict on my shoulders. I looked back to her thinking "All this just cos I met a woman and fell in love?!" Then I came completely back into the present. I was at a quiet tram stop and the beautiful young lady had been staring at me the whole time. She looked like she knew what I'd been through for a woman like her. I was embarrassed at realising I'd just had a flashback, I'd never had an intense one in public before so I made sure she was comfortable and broke eye contact with her. I described that because it also gives a rough overview of my journey. It was an edited version of the fight I fought. My question is how does one get over PTSD? Therapy, psychology etc isn't helping because past life trauma isn't believed. Indeed if the tram lady knew I was feeling guilty over being Mick Collins she would have thought me mad just like everyone else does. I'm just wondering if other past life soldiers have this issue? If so how do you cope with it? Taking alcohol until it destroys your liver can't be the only answer. There must be something else. I fear I've bitten off more than I can chew. Any feedback would be most appreciated. I'm sick of being constantly anxious and not feeling fully in control of my mind.