Veil of Forgetfulness

Discussion in 'Past Life Memories' started by Speedwell, Dec 8, 2018.

  1. Speedwell

    Speedwell Senior Registered

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    I think I've heard this term used, as a way of describing the process of entering a human body, whether at birth, or also when returning to the body after a Near Death Experience (NDE). The idea is that one of the conditions of our entering this world is that we are supposed to forget. That is, in order to enter fully into this life, and respond naturally to it, all preconceptions are removed, so we can view this world with fresh eyes.

    I know that for many people here this process of forgetting has not been very effective, as there is a lot of remembering too.

    One thing I wanted to describe from my own experience is that I seemed to get an extra-strong dosage of the 'forgetfulness', though things still leaked through, in many ways, I came into this world feeling somewhat bewildered. One example, I remember just after I started school, I must have been five years old, looking round the main hall during assembly, seeing myself surrounded by children. In some ways I felt privileged and glad to be among them, but somehow very puzzled. The thing is, I wasn't a child. I wasn't a human. I don't know what I was, a point of disembodied consciousness maybe. I found it difficult to understand how it was that I was allowed to be among all these humans, when I myself wasn't human.

    I gradually acclimatised myself to this environment, but had difficulty in making sense of many everyday expectations, how people were expected to behave, to dress and so on. We were taught how to spell, how to do sums (arithmetic), but no-one would answer the questions which were uppermost - what was this place all about? No-one seemed to even understand my questions, they thought I was being disrespectful or a troublemaker when I tried to find out. I think the adults genuinely didn't understand my questions. There were so many things which were taken for granted, this is just the way things are, but every aspect of things seemed a puzzle to me.

    There were of course bits of past-life recall creeping through, but often at an almost subconscious level, rather than as direct memories. I seemed to stumble along, doing competently well in some areas at school, but not feeling fully involved in things. In my early teenage years I had a kind of premonition. Just from looking around and seeing the path which others had taken, it was clear that at some point in the coming years I should reach adulthood. But I knew I'd never get there. I felt something had to give, that I would almost certainly be dead before the age of twenty. Reaching adulthood was an impossibility for me.

    Of course, the Earth kept on moving around the Sun, the days kept ticking by. After leaving school I was pretty lost. I'd no idea what to do next. A number of my classmates from school were going to university, so I figured that was maybe a good idea. I followed along and found myself starting at university, still pretty much as lost and bewildered as I had been on my first day at infant school all those years earlier.

    And here is where the veil began to lift. The encounters I had with various people, fellow students and their friends, seemed to trigger something in me. I started to flourish - in one sense at least. My studies fell by the wayside. I was a hopeless student. But it was as though I'd undergone not exactly a personality transplant, but more of a joining of a whole, fully-developed personality, and merging it with the shadow person who'd looked after the physical body up to that time. From that point on, I felt whole for the first time.

    However, it was a mixed blessing. This wholeness gave an immense joy, perhaps for a brief time the happiest I'd ever been, or would be again. But this new beginning was also the start of the greatest troubles. It seemed now I had the strength of an adult body, it was time to take on the pains and struggles, picking up where I left off in an earlier existence, and entering on a roller-coaster of ups and downs, taking me to the edges of despair more than once. Eventually I could take no more. I'd already decided against suicide. My view was that the reason why I might take my own life was to stop the pain and suffering. But in doing so, I saw very clearly that I would be introducing tremendous pain and suffering into the lives of others - those who loved me, had cared for me for so many years, would feel the blame was theirs, a burden they'd carry for the rest of their days. It was a poor bargain. End my own pain, but create several times more pain for others. What sort of a deal was that? It made no sense. So, at the edge of despair, at the point where one cannot go on, and with no possibility of ending it all, what does one do?

    I did the only thing I could at that point, what was left? I prayed. I had no religion, I'd gone to a church school, my background was nominally Christian, but that wasn't me. I was mostly an atheist. But still I prayed. I prayed to a god that I didn't know even existed.

    And then, things grew a little brighter. I wept. Something I hadn't done in years. I cried for days, weeks at a time. But alongside all of this, I found my past-life identity. Suddenly everything made sense. I had a couple of false starts, I tried to match my date of birth with those of someone in the past, but that was a wrong answer. There were a number of clues, patterns which were clear, solid pointers, but it was when I found a particular photograph of someone from almost a century earlier that I stopped in my tracks. It was like looking in a mirror. Not the shape of the features, they are a somewhat transient thing, a face viewed from different angles or in different light can take on many different aspects. But it was the facial expression, looking into those eyes and seeing me looking back at myself across space and time.

    The details here will have to be sketchy. I did go on to share this with my friends, acquaintances, even people I'd only just met. I wasn't looking to convince or convert anybody. The only question I asked of others was, am I losing my sanity? I just wanted to know whether what I was thinking made any kind of sense. Was it reasonable? Now the people who I shared this with, face-to-face, had varied responses. But not a single one of them told me I was crazy. No-one said I was delusional. They didn't have to agree with me, but at least it seemed my idea was rational, reasonable. At that point of course I was dealing with just a cross-section of ordinary people, not students of the occult or part of some mystical society. Just plain, ordinary people. That had quite a calming effect. I didn't have to go out and sell this idea, it was ok if I kept it to myself, but at least it had passed a 'sanity check'.

    Wow - this post is much longer that I expected. I didn't plan to write all this, but it just seemed to flow.
     
    Last edited: Dec 8, 2018
  2. CanSol

    CanSol Senior Registered

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    Yeah I get that, once you start writing you don't stop till you're out of words, which can be a good thing

    I totaly get the being lost part, I didn't know why I had to go to school, I already knew the stuff so became a pain for some teachers, mostly the history and english because I kept correcting them and the books so got a lot of free hours that way

    I think if you've been around the block several times, even if you're not aware of it yet, can make it hard to adjust to a new world (each decade is so different from the next that if you skip a few, let alone centuries, you might as well be on a different planet)
     
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  3. Speedwell

    Speedwell Senior Registered

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    On the subject of already knowing stuff, I suppose maybe I did, but not in terms of words or names, it was more subconscious.

    One thing I remember particularly about school. Some subjects were fairly tolerable, some I even enjoyed. But the one subject I couldn't bear was history. It was the most tedious, boring stuff that I disliked with a passion. Only later did I understand why. At school they were teaching me English history, all the kings and queens, the rebellions, the peasants. None of it had anything to do with me. The reason, my recent past life was in a different European country. So essentially I was learning the history of a foreign land - even though I was born and raised here.

    Some subjects I guess came naturally. I mostly muddled my way along in primary school without really caring or trying. Only when parents' day came around did I find out from my mother that I'd come top of the class in maths. I wasn't impressed, it was all uninteresting really. I did prefer practical subjects, which were given only a small part of the time. Later on physics too, it just seemed a whole load of common-sense, you could reason things out. (Until you reach the advanced stuff when it becomes stuffed with mathematical formulae and theoretical concepts).
     
  4. CanSol

    CanSol Senior Registered

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    Totally relate, the only class I didn't skip at some point, was the tech class (woodworking, metalworking, carpentry etc) it was the only place where you could just do/make what you want with only a few assigned projects
    I skipped 2 classes and left school by the time I was 16, was done there were no more grades to go to and I was fed up with it all

    I flunked math, if I got one satisfactory mark in a year it was considered good and eventually it was decided that I dropped it all together, one of the only things a teacher and I agreed on, anything technical? No problem (from drawing blueprints to making walls, benches, even a go cart at some point)

    Subconsiously you know a lot more and when something happens that you recognize you just do, only later you sometimes have a thought like "huh, how did I know..."
    When a car crash happened near my house I didn't think, I reacted
    Here I was, a 6 year old running around checking pulses, applying tourniquets, creating splints and badaging like a fully trained medic (to this day, if I see a serious bleeding I just slap a tourniquet on rather than try to stem the bleed with pressure and bandages), I grew up with increasing memories from WWII but didn't know how to call the stuff I was using, I just did everything without thinking on the auto pilot (general medic logic, as soon as you start thinking, people die, in other words just do what you're good at)
     
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  5. pathfinder

    pathfinder New Member

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    For me this veil seems to be running very deep. Whenever I try to meditate using some sort of visualization technique, I only get blurry visions.
    I have no memory of a past life whatsoever, only a feeling of being lost and displaced.
    I was an energetic child until I entered highschool where I clashed with some classmates and was unable to form any kind of friendship during the first two years. After I changed schools, things became quieter and I became more and more secluded. Very few teachers were able to spark my interest and most classes were extremely dull and very soon I found myself spacing out to the point were I had trouble differentiating between dream and reality. In retrospect I wouldn't call it simple daydreaming, it felt more like being on a threshold but I've never quite stepped through the door.
    Those were dark times for me. I even had thoughts of suicide which I dismissed for the abovementioned reasons. Although I've overcome depression now, there remains a lingering feeling of yearning and displacedness (Is that even a word?). Who am I? What am I? And where do I belong? I have been unable to answer these questions.
    Another thing I can relate to is that feeling of not reaching adulthood. I do not know how to properly act as an adult, because I've never been one. I commit many blunders, I belief, out of mere ignorance. And although it started as a joke, whenever I tell my husband "deep inside I am 12 years old", it feels true to me, despite the fact that I am approaching 40. I don't know why it is 12, but it would seem that some part of me doesn't age or ages very much slower than my physical form.
     
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  6. tanker

    tanker Senior Registered

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    Interesting to read about everyone's attitudes to schooldays. I almost feel guilty now - I loved school. Learning was what I wanted to do. Couldn't get enough of it. All except history ... yes, Speedwell, like you I was being taught the history of a foreign country, the one I'd just been reborn into. I failed miserably at that.

    The main difference in life then was that I never related to other kids. I was only ever interested in adults. I never felt that I'd been a child. My brain wasn't a child's. I used to take myself off to the local library and read the adult books, even when I was three. (A bit limited, as I couldn't reach many shelves.) So my schoolmates' parents were the only people I gravitated towards. They used to call me 'the dreamer' as I was always lost in another world.
     
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  7. There and back again

    There and back again Senior Member

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    The world today is a strange and difficult place but what gets me the most besides the systems of control is people in general where it feels like a big part of humanity is just part of the program like NPCs in a game. As for remembering and forgetting it always comes through in different ways besides just memories as there is loads of little things that manifest themselves in daily life through the personality and actions.
     
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  8. steve moody

    steve moody New Member

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    I really don't have any past life memories except once when I passed out from low blood pressure, I saw an image of my brother and me in pale blue Nazi uniforms. We were children and I thought we might have been in the Hitler Youth. I also have a recurring dream that I am a cougar running accross a meadow. I struggled a bit in school, but not a lot, I was just really bored with it. I found out later I have a high IQ, 148. That's probably why. I do feel sometines that I'm not human, just a mental entity moving through time. I do think there is something to reincartion but I'm deep in the veil of forgetfulness. I think maybe we're reincarnated over and over forever so we don't go crazy from being bored with infinite time.
     
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  9. tanker

    tanker Senior Registered

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    Hi Steve - just a point about the uniforms if it helps. I haven't come across pale blue uniforms in the Hitler Youth or the army. Here's what children would have worn. Does this look like what you remember?
    [​IMG]
     
  10. steve moody

    steve moody New Member

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    No, more like this one.
     
  11. tanker

    tanker Senior Registered

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    Ah, that's the standard field-grey uniform - officers.
     
  12. steve moody

    steve moody New Member

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    I remember the scene vividly, it was if I was looking at a photograph. We were sitting at a small wooden table, I looked to be about 11 or 12 years old, my brother about 17 or 18. The uniforms were very pale blue or gray and very plain and simple with small swastikas on the collars and cuffs.
     
  13. tanker

    tanker Senior Registered

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    I'm lost - haven't seen swastikas on collars or cuffs! But I was regular army. The feldgrau covered a wide variety of colours, from grey to green. Luftwaffe had blue, but not sure if it was all that pale. Sorry not to be more helpful.
     

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