Who was I?

Discussion in 'Past Life Memories' started by Ender27, Jul 23, 2014.

  1. Ender27

    Ender27 Senior Registered

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    Hello, I'm new there and that's my first post. Sorry for my English, but come from Poland and don't speak without mistakes :) and, as I have to say, my visual remembrence is just horrible and gives me little chances to see anything in the imagination. Why do I add that post? Need some help, maybe you know anyone, who fits that description. Please, it pesters me.
    For me, this is obvious, that my PL 'from WW II' lived in Germany, came from Bavaria and wasn't holy. He played violin, listened to the classical music and was interested in occultism. Typical SS-man, you can think. But he wasn't convincend to the ideology of Nazi-Germany. Working as a doctor, he didn't want to kill another people for the 'race'. How under-race could pose a threat for 'master race'?
    As long as I remember, history of WW II is my real passion. My friends and me played outdoor a lot and a play „in the war” was a necessity. My 'character' often got hurt in the leg and, in the future, killed by allies, although he didn't do anything wrong, although he 'worked' just as a spy and provided informations about Germans' plans.
    When I was eight or nine, mum let me to buy eight toy-soldiers (I'm a girl, although it doesn't seem that my soul fits that body. W/M, not gender. Do not mistake, please). They became my firing squad and special military unit and tortured or killed barbie dolls, which I really hated.
    Mp 40 smg and another machine guns quickly became my favourite weapon, although I've never kept any of them in hands – neither the dummy :) Just... perfect to hold it, to aim and shoot. Planes are my passion, too. Can talk about them in hours.
    My imaginary friend was my identical twin-sister, which I called Ola. Parents were really scared about me, when I started to talk to her. Ugh, I felt a bit embarassed, because 'both of us' was sure, that we should be born as boyes.
    Twins were and are my obsession.
    When you move or do something with your face, you can imagine, how does it look – right? Sometimes I'm able to do it and to see... somebody That's not fair-haired girl, just a boy with black... no, dark-brown hair, wearing brown coat and hat fashionable in 20's. He's at my age and growes up with me. Has accompanied my mind since childhood. No, no, I can't see him around me, he's just a part of imagination. Not schizophrenia :)
    But sometimes I can see him older. How does he look? He's twenty nine, wears Waffen-SS uniform, has short dark bron hair and, although I can't see his face, it is sure for me, that he's got long nose and blue eyes. I often tried to 'look at the mirror' in my imagination, but it's impossible. His range? Hmm, good question. An officer, this is sure, possibly Hauptsturfuehrer or Sturmbannfuehrer. Has got two 'lightnings' and squares, maybe lines, but I can't count them.
    A month ago, I got a bit bored and started to look for nazi marching songs. Found lyrics on wikipedia and started to sing one of them, reading lyrics. Then I turned on the player and wondered. I sang in right melody. Strange.
    My 'visions' have begun long time ago. First, from childhood, told me a lot about battles and now came back with a vengeance. Memories are seen in colours and, although I haven't seen pictures or photos before, one of my memories was about battle of Prochorowka. I recognized it some time later.
     
  2. Ender27

    Ender27 Senior Registered

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    I am twenty nine years old. Receive a machine gun and march with countrymen to fight for beloved motherland. We march proudly, we – Waffen-SS, special unit – are ready to cope with the challenge and overcome Russians, what was too difficult for those 'idiots from Wehrmacht', as many SS-men think. We're better equipped, well trained, what can go wrong? Huh. I don't believe, that we're able to overcome USSR, but stay quiet. Me, the doctor with gun, going to injure people and... help them subsequently.


    Battle rages on. So many injuried, so many dead people and me, me, who can't do anything for them, who has to shoot and watch passively that... shambles. We have to run away with honour, we won't win this battle! Why are we fighting? It doesn't make any sense. Thousands of suffering people, lot of them killed by my gun. I turn off myself, just aim and shoot.


    We're moving back. Yeah, it has to be so. I'm just frustrated and... yeah, sad, although I wouldn't ever told it to anybody in PL. I don't want to move, I don't want to come back to my country. I want to stay there and think about nothing, surrounded by dead bodies. Leave me alone, everybody.


    'Heinrich, come on! Quickly, you will die, if you would stay here. That's a command!'


    My friend is shouting it straight to my poor ear. I'm just ignoring him, a bit more frustrated. Someone is disturbing in my reflection. Although I'm thinking about nothing.


    He's pulling me to slowly forming array. I'm pulling out, we start to fight. And... suddenly my friend is falling into the ground, devoid of head. I'm watching it, opening eyes widely and, shaking of the schock, starting to run in unknow direction, through the safe forest. Desertion? Suicide thoughts? No, nothing of that. Just a panic.


    But I am pulling myself together and coming back my army patiently, quietly and obediently. Everyone is scowled. What to say our commandants? What to say families? We have to come back.


    Emptiness, I don't remember anything until living in a city with injuried leg. I am trying to save another lives: Poles, Gypsies, Jews. Herr Reichsfuehrer is geting mad on me and calling 'for a talk'. He is sending me to KL Auschwitz or Dachau (I'm not sure, was in both of them in my PL) and giving two months to 'rehabilite myself'. I am forced to bring people hidden by my. Order is an order and I have to fall asleep his vigilance. I remember just, hm, nothing from Lager. Possibly there were many experiments, but I never wanted to hurt another person without necessity. I don't know, what I've done, maybe something terrible and my mind saves me from that. I remember only one 'bad' thing in my PL.


    Me, in uniform, with a machine gun aimed at little child watching me scared, unable even to cry. And his parents (as I think), begging me to do not shoot. And shouts behind me: 'Heinrich, what are you waiting for? Just do it! That's nothing more than little Jewish junk!'. My hand is trembling, tears are overflowing my eyes. I have to remember about people hidden by me. I have to imitate a fanatic. I have to be convincing.


    Shot is crushing child's head. Another SS-men are taping me on the back and joking about dead kid. I can't say 'sorry' to parents, I won't be able to visit grave. His body will just burn. My God, I have tears in eyes at the moment. I am thinking about myself as about weak, effeminate man, who can do anything under the pression.


    The last of my clear memory is my death. I am locked in a jail as war criminal only in the reason of being in SS. I am around fourty six years old, it can be 1960 or something like that. Bullied, ridiculed and slandered by 'winners' I am standing before the judge and listening to the judgement.


    Death by hanging. Unbelievable, after that all they want to judge me as a traitor and are chosing for me the worst path of death. The day of execution is coming, I am crying and praying in my cell. 'God, if I have done something wrong, please, forgive me'.
     
  3. Ender27

    Ender27 Senior Registered

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    Watchmen are leading me to death. Now I am calm and quiet, like always. Shocked. Silent. I can't believe, that this is truth.


    And that's the end of my PL.


    Do you have any ideas, who can this man be? A few months ago I got scared, that I could be born as Josef Mengele, but there are some details, which don't fit to his character. His name is not sure for me, but the most possible.


    Thanks for reading. Sorry, that I've written so much and had to add it in three posts :|
     
  4. tanguerra

    tanguerra Senior Registered

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    Hi Ender27


    Welcome to the forum. No it's not too long and your English is fine.


    How very interesting! I love the stuff about your childhood too. I wonder if the boy you remember and your imaginary friend was your brother? This is something others have spoken about too.


    Here is a list of Nazi doctors tried for war crimes. It has pictures too. Do any of these look familiar?


    http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Doctors'_trial
     
  5. Ender27

    Ender27 Senior Registered

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    Thank you, Tanguerra!


    I haven't got any brother, only sister. That real :)


    My imaginatonary friend was a girl, Aleksandra (Ola). And that boy, which I see in my mind... he's just me. I think about him as about myself.


    Oh, my, so many of nazis has Jewish features, as I look at the link. Ech, even Reichsfuehrer has. There is nothing wrong with Jews, there is something wrong with anti-Semite Jews.


    The one, who fits the best (face) is Waldemar Hoven, his biography has some common points, but that's not he. I'm trying to draw, create in any program or just imagine his face, but it's really difficult. His name is seven-lettered (I'm not sure, if that is in pronunciation or spelling), there is something like 's'
     
  6. Ender27

    Ender27 Senior Registered

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    There's one more thing, I should say. Children. Children loved me in my PL and love me now. I love them, too.


    And... when I was maybe five, six, interested myself into medicine. I was watching programmes for children and reading medical books. Was going to become a surgeon or pediatrician in the future (but changed it into astrophysics now...). My 'favourite', that means, the most often diagnosed on my 'patients', acting children, illneses, were tetanus, typhoid, tuberculosis and whooping-cough.


    Maybe it will help a bit. I'm still thinking and thinking, but nothing comes to my mind.
     
  7. ZeonChar

    ZeonChar Senior Member

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    Thanks for sharing your story with us. It's all very interesting! A lot of us started remembering at a young age just thinking it was fantasy, but it turned out to be real. Do you just recall spontaneously? Have you ever tried past life regression or self hypnosis? These might be useful tools to you in helping remember who you are. A lot of times when going to bed when you are really sleepy before falling asleep this mirrors a meditative state and you can ask for information in this state to see what comes up. I would try asking specifically for your name and try to go from there. PM me if you would like more in-depth advice as I'd like to help you out. I also remember a PL in Nazi Germany so we have something in common.
     
  8. Ender27

    Ender27 Senior Registered

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    Spontaneously... it appears often, when I think about anything connected with WW II or with my PL. I've never tried hypnosis, because I'm not sure, how to do it. Wait, I'll write you, thanks for advices.
     
  9. Demi

    Demi Senior Registered

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    Hello Ender. Thank you for sharing your memories. There are a whole lot there which is similar to my own..! I will PM you also...


    Demi
     
  10. Owl

    Owl Super-alt Mitglied

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    Hello there

    I know I shouldn't be the one saying it, but since nobody is mentioning it... I wouldn't even worry of the possibility of having had been him: the name doesn't match, he didn't got to jail nor die by hanging, he didn't have a long nose nor blue eyes and I really don't think he got shot in the leg during war. Even though the incident that got him out of war is not clear, not documented and I don't really remember, I think that if he was limping throughout Günzburg it would have been something that people remembered and it would be in books. So really, if it's a possibility that scared you, don't even worry about it. It's just that JM is the symbol of "Nazi doctor" and the first easy conclusion.


    That being said, now let's get to work. The person we're looking for:

    • Was named Heinrich
    • Was born in Bavaria
    • Was in the SS
    • Served in the Russian front
    • Worked as a doctor either in Auschwitz or Dachau
    • Got injured in the leg
    • Went to jail
    • Was sentenced to death by hanging
    • Had a long nose and blue eyes


    With that information it should actually be pretty easy to find you, however there is a problem: the only records of a doctor in those camps called Heinrich is Heinrich Schütz, in Dachau, but he died in the 80's and he was not from Bavaria. http://de.wikipedia.org/wiki/Heinrich_Sch%C3%BCtz_%28Arzt%29


    Allright then, maybe the name is wrong? I like to make lists of SS concentration camp personnel to help their reincarnations. Let's check the Auschwitz ones to see what doctors were born in Bavaria:


    _ Eduard Wirths and possibly his brother Helmut Wirths


    Nobody else from Auschwitz (well except for Mengele but I already stated why it doesn't match)


    Now let's see from Dachau:


    _ Fritz Hintermayer


    _Sigmund Rascher


    _Claus Schilling


    _Waldemar Wolter


    That's it, although there were 3 or 4 in Dachau that I don't have their birthplace. Now, from these people, let's see who died by hanging:


    _ Eduard Wirths commited suicide by hanging.


    _ Nothing is known about his brother Helmut's fate, so I assume he wasn't sentenced to anything, otherwise it would have been known.


    _ Fritz Hintenmayer died by hanging in 1946


    _ Sigmund Rascher it's likely that he also died by hanging, in 1945


    _ Claus Schilling died by hanging in 1946


    _ Waldemar Wolter also died by hanging in 1946


    So looks like pretty much everyone except for Wirth's brother. Allright, now let's see who of these men could have joined the SS around the time they were 29.


    _ Waldemar Wolter was born in 1908 and joined the SS in 1941, he was 33 by the time he joined the SS. So he could be a possibility.


    _ Claus Schilling was born in 1874, he would have been too old to be a young SS. Discarded.


    _ Sigmund Rascher was born in 1909 and joined the SS in 1933. He was then 24, could be a possibility.


    _ Fritz Hintenmayer was born in 1911 and was in the SS in 1938, so he was 27. Another possibility.


    _ Eduard Wirths was born in 1909 and was in the SS in 1934, so he was 25 years old. Another possibility.


    (it continues in the next post... too long I guess)
     
  11. Owl

    Owl Super-alt Mitglied

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    So we have 4 people here. Let's see if there's any information of them being injured in the leg:


    _ Edward Wirths was medically unfit for combat after... a Heart attack! (wow! I didn't know that). Therefore, discarded.


    _ Sigmund Rascher: I can't find information about why he was dismissed from the front.


    _ Fritz Hintenmayer: he had a head injury in the Russian front. Discarded.


    _ Waldemar Wolter: It doesn't say if he was injured or not.


    So by this information we're down to two possible people, Rascher and Wolter. You' ve probably seen pictures of Rascher, and I can't seem to be able to find any of Wolter. So if you're correct that you were born in Bavaria, worked as a doctor in Dachau, and died by hanging, these are the two best matching options. You'll have to remember more or try to find if any of these two men were injured in the leg, to confirm it.


    Now, if you could be wrong about the camp, that changes things.


    Good luck!
     
  12. Ender27

    Ender27 Senior Registered

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    Oh, thanks so much, Owl :)


    I'm sure, that his name was Heinrich. In the camp, one person said, that 'We share the name with Herr Reichsfuehrer'. Lutipold?


    I had one older brother, sister, who died in early childhood and invalid father, who died nearly 1921. He was the veteran of the Great War.


    I was studying medicine at LMU.


    There are two another possible camps: Dresden and Majdanek.
     
  13. Owl

    Owl Super-alt Mitglied

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    What is LMU?


    How do you get the information that you worked in those camps? Do they just seem familiar or you have any memories about them?


    Update: seems like nobody in Majdanek who was called Heinrich died by hanging, infact, looks like not that many people were hanged from that camp. Are you sure there was a Kz in Dresden? Seems to be part of Flossenburg http://www.jewishvirtuallibrary.org/jsource/Holocaust/cclist.html
     
  14. Ender27

    Ender27 Senior Registered

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    LMU - Ludwig Maximillians Universitaet, Muenchen.


    I remember anything and feel connected with those places.
     
  15. Owl

    Owl Super-alt Mitglied

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    Ok, back to work. Let's assume we don't quite know what camp you were in, since there doesn't seem to be anyone fitting those characteristics in the camps you mentioned. However, if you're sure your name was Heinrich and that you died by hanging that makes things pretty easy. Any Kz Nazi that died by hanging had a trial, we find the trial papers, we find the Nazi. Now all we got to check is every Kz trial.


    I' ll list the people named Heinrich. Next to it I' ll write if they are or they are not possibilities.


    Mauthausen trial


    Heinrich Fitschok: born in 1925 and died in 1947, so he never got to be 29. http://pl.wikipedia.org/wiki/Heinrich_Fitschok


    Heinrich Eisenhöfer: born in 1893. Too old to have been a young SS http://pl.wikipedia.org/wiki/Heinrich_Eisenh%C3%B6fer


    Heinrich Stumpf: Didn't die by hanging


    Heinrich Häger: I think it says he was 54, anyways, doesn't seem to have been a doctor


    Heinrich Giese: he worked as a guard, not a doctor


    https://www.jewishvirtuallibrary.org/jsource/Holocaust/dachautrial/50.pdf


    Heinrich Luetscher: Business man, didn't die by hanging https://www.jewishvirtuallibrary.org/jsource/Holocaust/dachautrial/518.pdf


    Heinrich Wagner: Life imprisonment https://www.jewishvirtuallibrary.org/jsource/Holocaust/dachautrial/512.pdf


    Heinrich Fulsche: Right age, but he was a mason https://www.jewishvirtuallibrary.org/jsource/Holocaust/dachautrial/520.pdf


    Allright, nobody else from Mauthausen, let's move onto another camp..


    Auschwitz trials


    Heinrich Josten: Born in 1893... too old http://de.wikipedia.org/wiki/Heinrich_Josten


    Hmmm Not too many people named Heinrich in Auschwitz I guess... allright, another camp...


    Bergen Belsen trials


    Heinrich Schrierer: only got 15 years imprisonment https://www.jewishvirtuallibrary.org/jsource/Holocaust/WarCrime6.html


    Buchenwald trials


    Zwickl, Heinrich : He was an hungarian farmer https://www.jewishvirtuallibrary.org/jsource/Holocaust/dachautrial/b20.pdf


    Buuck, Heinrich : right age, but another farmer, this time German https://www.jewishvirtuallibrary.org/jsource/Holocaust/dachautrial/b8.pdf
     
  16. Owl

    Owl Super-alt Mitglied

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    Dachau trials

    Beck, Heinrich: farmer and tailor, sentenced to 3 years https://www.jewishvirtuallibrary.org/jsource/Holocaust/dachautrial/d117.pdf

    Lehner, Heinrich: mechanic, sentenced to 5 years
    https://www.jewishvirtuallibrary.org/jsource/Holocaust/dachautrial/d110.pdf


    Trixl, Heinrich: Austrian merchant https://www.jewishvirtuallibrary.org/jsource/Holocaust/dachautrial/d81.pdf

    Hoehlen, Otto Heinrich: sentenced to 3 years https://www.jewishvirtuallibrary.org/jsource/Holocaust/dachautrial/d69.pdf

    Witt, Heinrich : Born in 1897... too old... http://pl.wikipedia.org/wiki/Heinrich_Witt

    Fischbach, Heinrich: acquitted https://www.jewishvirtuallibrary.org/jsource/Holocaust/dachautrial/d48.pdf

    Palme, Heinrich: Farmer and forest worker https://www.jewishvirtuallibrary.org/jsource/Holocaust/dachautrial/d45.pdf

    Schiebel, Heinrich: acquitted https://www.jewishvirtuallibrary.org/jsource/Holocaust/dachautrial/d37.pdf

    Heinrich, Reinhold Berthold: acquitted https://www.jewishvirtuallibrary.org/jsource/Holocaust/dachautrial/d30.pdf

    Richter, Heinrich: 10 years

    Jochimsen, Heinrich: 3 years

    Bloesser, Alois Heinrich: 3 years
    https://www.jewishvirtuallibrary.org/jsource/Holocaust/dachautrial/d21.pdf

    Rudolf - Heinrich Suttrop: right age, but doesn't seem to be a doctor http://de.wikipedia.org/wiki/Rudolf_Heinrich_Suttrop

    Majdanek trials

    SS Dr Heinrich Schmidt: acquitted and released. Ah, too bad, that would have been a good one. He also died in 2000 though http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Heinrich_Schmidt_(physician)

    Heinrich Groffmann: Acquitted & Released https://www.jewishvirtuallibrary.org/jsource/Holocaust/WarCrime40.html

    Fritz-Heinrich Petrick: 4 Years Imprisonment https://www.jewishvirtuallibrary.org/jsource/Holocaust/WarCrime40.html

    Treblinka trial


    Heinrich Matthes : Life Imprisonment https://www.jewishvirtuallibrary.org/jsource/Holocaust/WarCrime61.html

    Sachsenhausen trials

    Heinrich Fressemann: Life Imprisonment https://www.jewishvirtuallibrary.org/jsource/Holocaust/WarCrime52.html

    Belzec trial

    Heinrich Unverhau : Acquitted & Released https://www.jewishvirtuallibrary.org/jsource/Holocaust/WarCrime8.html

    Hadamar trial

    Heinrich Ruoff: born in 1887.... too old https://www.ushmm.org/wlc/en/article.php?ModuleId=10007265

    Second Bergen Belsen trial

    Heinrich Redehase: he was sentenced to death, but I cannot find anything else on him. Maybe an option?

    Gaggenhau trial

    Heinrich Neuschwanger : death sentence, cannot find anything else. Someone else to research further.

    Neuengamme trial

    Heinrich Ruge : death by hanging. Look further

    Ravensbruck trial

    Heinrich Peters : 15 years
     
  17. Owl

    Owl Super-alt Mitglied

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    Dora trials


    Heinrich Detmers: 7 years http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Dora_Trial


    Kurt Heinrich: acquitted


    http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Dora_Trial


    Theresienstadt


    Heinrich Jöckel


    10.07.1899 in Offenbach


    SS-Hauptsturmführer


    executed 25.10.1946 in Leitmeritz


    Too old


    http://forum.axishistory.com/viewtopic.php?f=38&t=148851


    I might be missing more people from this camp


    Ok, that's all I found. I found no information of defendants of a possible Plaszow trial. So I don't know what to tell you, none of this people seem to be your guy. Maybe you were not in a Kz?
     
  18. Demi

    Demi Senior Registered

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    Your description indicates that your trial was in Germany but could you have been on a trial by the Soviets, maybe in connection to being POW in USSR? And simply for membership of the SS, just mentioning this possibility. Unlike Wehrmacht soldiers, SS men often had tattoos and this is how the Russians recognized them. They might not even know much of your past, unless you told them while interrogated.
     
  19. Owl

    Owl Super-alt Mitglied

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    But all concentration camp personnel trials seem to be in the Jewish virtual library and already listed. So if it's a trial by the soviets then it's for something else that being related to a Kz. So if she was there, then she didn't get tried for that.
     
  20. Ender27

    Ender27 Senior Registered

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    OK, give me some time to read about all of those people, because tonight I'll be out of the Internet - until Wednesday.


    Yes, I had got tatoo.But I don't remember nor my group neither the number.


    PS.It wasn't Russia, there were Americans and one French (... hate that man). I don't recognize any Russian.
     

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