Will abusive parents get punished in future lives?

Discussion in 'Reincarnation Questions' started by JustinTime, Nov 10, 2017.

  1. JustinTime

    JustinTime Probationary

    Aug 26, 2017
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    I know many parents who are extremely selfish and physically or emotionally abuse their children for their own selfish purposes, such as status, vanity, or desire to believe that their children owe them everything. I've seen situations where children's lives are ruined when they become adults because of the significant abuse doled out by their parents when they were young.

    Is this caused by karma? If so, will the abusive parents incur negative karma for abusing their children, and will they have to experience the same treatment in future lives?

    It doesn't seem fair at all that parents, who have power over their kids and their upbringing, get to abuse this power and ruin a child's entire life just because they are selfish and care about themselves. What is the karmic consequences for abusive and selfish parents who end up screwing their children, when the children did nothing wrong?
    Last edited: Nov 10, 2017
  2. baro-san

    baro-san Senior Member

    Mar 28, 2017
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    option 1. In a future life those parents will experience something comparable to what their children felt in this life.

    option 2. The souls that incarnated as those parents purposefully accepted such a negative role, to help the souls currently incarnated as their children to balance their karmic baggage; in this case they're willing to accumulate some negative karmic traces. Only advanced souls do this.

    Almost all of us, humans, think that we know what's right and what's wrong, and make judgements, but in fact we don't really know that, and we don't understand much about why we're here. Besides, we're too indulgent with our errors, and too judgemental about others. But all is okay, karma takes care of everything, and with every incarnation we get a small step better, a small step less ignorant.
    fireflydancing likes this.
  3. Mere Dreamer

    Mere Dreamer Super Moderators Staff Member Super Moderator

    Feb 14, 2014
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    I don't think abuse is "caused by karma" ... rather, it's part of the process by which we discover qualities in ourselves that we might not have otherwise noticed. Sometimes it's only in certain situations that we notice how what we think and believe about ourselves and the world changes how we behave.

    I've shocked myself with my own behavior many times, and it was the shock that woke me up to changing the thinking that lead to that choice. I wouldn't be who I am today without the mistakes I've made ... even though I hurt people along the way, they also helped me learn how not to hurt people quite so much.

    For example, people who are born rich are living out a situation that reveals their character in a completely different way than someone born poor. The same person may behave very differently depending on their wealth, and that contrast is an education in the end. Their choices will become apparent once they remember themselves separate from circumstances as the ones who chose.

    Looking back after a life is over and they've run out of excuses, the abusive parent has a chance to recognize how they acted and to analyze what happened in their family. Sometimes they manage to do this while still alive, or even early on before their children grow up. And when people truly see themselves clearly without excuses or blame, they can transform and try to repair the damage.

    From what I can see, karma isn't an external will inflicted on anyone so much as the path or network of relationships we accumulate as we explore in each life. We give and receive imprints in every relationship we touch, and at any moment we can change what qualities we contribute. Everything interacts. We don't exist in isolation, so we influence others who influence us in response. It's that simple.

    When you expand that to lifetimes of interaction, of course we'll find ourselves interacting with patterns of our own making. It's not the end of the matter, just a chance to change our mind or add more of the same, depending on what choice we make.

    Just as we plant gardens in soil that is made up of decomposing elements of previous life, without the past there would be no nutrients for present growth. Karma is soil in which to grow tall and strong ... or in which we may choose never to sprout in a lifetime. It's up to us whether we give up and rot because we're surrounded by "death" or pull the nutrients (wisdom) out of the soil to take root and create new life. Both are valid options.

    It's the same for the children, spouses, and strangers who receive abuse. The abuse is a "circumstance of life" because we're all influenced by each other and some of those influences are painful.... Every life comes with its own challenges, and many are extremely unfair. Still, an abused child can grow up, analyse themselves, realize they didn't deserve to be treated that way, recognize the parents were at fault, and then choose how they will act toward the world around them in light of that.

    Will they continue the pattern by abusing others or break it by spreading kindness? Will they continue to accept abuse once they have the space to choose or learn to separate themselves from people who behave that way? It's not forced on them to go either way. There is no trap, just a choice.

    Who will you be? How will you live? What will you contribute? It's the same questions we all answer in every lifetime.
    fireflydancing and AlexD like this.

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