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Clutching at straws

A

Aph

New Member
My 19 month old son has never slept well - the occasional 5-hour stretch is remembered for weeks - and I am probably imagining things due to sleep deprivation! Anyway.

1) He has absolutely no fear and is fiercely and scarily independent, until it comes to water. Until very recently he would scream in any pool, it's a rare bath that lasts more than a few minutes and he never sits down in it. A few days ago we went on a ferry, just a few minute trip across the river. As soon as he saw the boat he tensed and clung on to me. He refused to get in and I had to carry him. He screamed from the moment we started to the moment we stopped. Once out, he recovered in a few moments but refused to look at the boat.

2) He will sit for a very long time holding and staring at a photo of me at age 3 with my dad, my dad being in the foreground. This is a kid that does NOT sit still!

3) Several people have been convinced his name is not what it actually is, but always the same name. These people don't know each other.

My dad served in WWII on ships. I found details of one of his ships, which was sunk soon after he left it. 37 out of 39 aboard were killed. One of them has a variant of the name, and was roughly my dad's age. Unfortunately my dad is no longer around to talk to. Is it possible my son was a friend if my dad's and he has memories from before? I wouldn't think about it at least until he's talking, but I wonder if this could lead to better sleep. He is very restless and wriggles a lot, cries out and makes other noises. When he wakes he sits up scarily fast and always seems afraid and confused. I wonder if he dreams - maybe about the attack - and my hope is I can use this "knowledge" to reassure him.

Any advice would be appreciated. I am reluctant to record too much for fear of subconsciously making "suggestions" to him when he's older. My interest at this point is purely focused on his sleep and anything else can wait until he's talking enough to say something or not. (Currently he has about 4 words, none of which is mama or dada)

TIA
 
Welcome to the forum. Yes, it does sound like past life memories. And it is possible he could be your dad or your dad's friend. You'll have to wait until he is able to talk more to get more information. Start keeping a journal and write down what you have just told us. As time goes on you can add to it. Past life memories are like jig saw puzzle pieces. Have you read any books on reincarnation? You should read Carol Bowman's books "Children's Past Lives" and "Return From Heaven". Many of your questions are answered there. Read through the old messages here, especially in the children's section. There are many amazing stories there. Also look at the Video Archive section. One more thing, when he is able to talk more you can ask him open ended questions. Best times are bedtime when they are sleepy and also riding in a car.
 
Thanks for quick reply. I'll see about finding the books, but in the meantime could you point me in the direction of helpful threads? My free time is limited these days to about an hour a day :(
 
Hi Aph,


I would definately follow argonne's advice and read Carol's books, they're very easy to digest and give helpful hints not just to help your son, but to help you as well. I also think it's possible that he may have been your dad in his past life, it seems to be fairly common for souls to return to the same family.


I think you've already taken a step in the right direction by at least acknowledging the fact that it could be past life memories affecting your son, whereas many other parents will often dismiss these things as an overactive imagination. Next time he's restless in bed and crying, try and softly reassure him and tell him that he's safe and loved, and that you are not going to let any harm come to him. It may look as if he's not listening, but your words of comfort will get through to him at least subconsciously. You can also try putting a blue light on in his room at night as some people have had some success in calming their children down with these.


You can use the search facility for threads with 'nightmares' in the post or title, I've already found one with a couple of useful links within the thread for you here.


Please keep us updated and if you have any further questions or anything you don't understand, then don't hesitate to ask.
 
Well, it seems I won't be getting the book for a while - the kindle version doesn't seem to be available here and shipping costs are unfortunately prohibitive. I think for now I will try reassuring him that he's here and now and safe. Thanks for the links.


I don't think he is/was my dad, as much as I would wish that were true. My dad was a sickly child who grew up to be an artist and his dislike of football/soccer was a cause of major conflict with his father, who had the opportunity to play for a well-known English club. My son is extremely physical, was kicking a ball almost before he could walk and shows no interest in anything artistic.


I did more research and the guy I was thinking of in fact wasn't killed in attack, but went on to be awarded a medal for gallantry. I will be getting more info soon about my dad's service so maybe something else will come up.
 
Don't limit the possibilities. He could have been someone else connected to the family such as grandparent, aunt/uncle, family friend. Or maybe no family connection at all. Time will tell.
 
Aph said:
Well, it seems I won't be getting the book for a while - the kindle version doesn't seem to be available here and shipping costs are unfortunately prohibitive. I think for now I will try reassuring him that he's here and now and safe. Thanks for the links.
I don't think he is/was my dad, as much as I would wish that were true. My dad was a sickly child who grew up to be an artist and his dislike of football/soccer was a cause of major conflict with his father, who had the opportunity to play for a well-known English club. My son is extremely physical, was kicking a ball almost before he could walk and shows no interest in anything artistic.


I did more research and the guy I was thinking of in fact wasn't killed in attack, but went on to be awarded a medal for gallantry. I will be getting more info soon about my dad's service so maybe something else will come up.
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Hi Aph,


Welcome to the forum.


Sleep deprivation is a terrible thing. I remember I went through it with my son! Like with most things, it passes, so hang in there! The best thing you can possibly do is to reassure your son constantly that he is safe and loved and cared for. Hopefully he will settle before too long and the bad dreams will fade if that's what's causing it.


Many children will be afraid of water and baths (and various other things - birds, dogs, fire, airplanes, you name it). This may well be to do with past life associations creating the fear. In any case, the cure is the same - slowly and gently get him used to it until he gets over it. Make sure you only pour a very shallow bath for him and make it as fun as possible with plenty of toys and fun at bath time. If possible, hop into the bath or shower with him and cuddle him and reassure him while he takes his bath. Try to create as many pleasant associations with water as you can. He will slowly grow out of it. Don't worry.


It is more usual for people to reincarnate back into the same family and friend groups, so I'd be more likely to think that he was your father than your father's friend. The fact that he wasn't interested in sports last time, and this was a source of friction, and that he now is, would actually support the point that he may be your father. It seems to be a pattern that people wish for a certain thing in one life and it comes true in the next. Sometimes they like the same things as before. Sometimes they want to do something they missed out on last time.


Does he have any mannerisms or other likes and dislikes that make you think of your father? What does your mother think? Does she say he's like him?
 
It is very important to keep notes and to not ask leading questions as he grows. He will reveal information as he is ready. Enjoy your journey of discovery :)
 
I'm amazed at the lack of attentive reading skills, and quickness to jump to conclusions here. He has not once said that he ever got the feeling that his son was his reincarnated dad. He said maybe former military buddy of his dad. How does that warrant trying to convince him that it might be his dad, who did NOT experience the devastating ship sinking?


Anyway, yeah. I think you'll pick up plenty of pointers for what to do by reading through the children's cases here. Sounds like you've already started to do so. I'd still write everything down, though. Not so much your speculations and suspicions - just record what your son does and says. No harm in having a written record of that.
 
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