Tonight, Matthew told us that he really needed to talk to us. He looked extrememly serious. He told us how he and his 4 yr. old cousin, Stephanie had kissed each other. Not on the lips, but they kissed each other on thier 'private parts', with thier pants down. After picking myself up off the floor, I asked him calmly where he had seen that before. He said that he had never seen it, but that his friend had told him that he did it to his girlfriend and then told Matthew about it. The only time that Matt is out of our sight is at day care. Other than that, he is with his mom, great grandmother or me. This one came out of nowhere!! What am I supposed to say to him?!
Mattsgma
- Thread starter deborah
- Start date
Galadriel
Senior Registered
Sounds like the old 'playing doctor' type game. Mostly I find that overreacting isn't the way to go. Best just to tell him that it isn't considered nice to do that with someone you aren't married to and you'd like for him to not do it at least until then. He seems to be the type that will understand that sort of logic.
I also find reminding myself of my mom's mantra helps in times like these. "The smarter they are, the more they are able to find trouble to get into." Which isn't completely reassuring, but at least I know my son is smart. I just wish he'd been as vocal about his memories as Matt. Except for the couple of incidents I posted here, he never really talked much about them.
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Galadriel aka Megan.
There is no such thing as too many books. Too few bookcases can become a problem, however.
I also find reminding myself of my mom's mantra helps in times like these. "The smarter they are, the more they are able to find trouble to get into." Which isn't completely reassuring, but at least I know my son is smart. I just wish he'd been as vocal about his memories as Matt. Except for the couple of incidents I posted here, he never really talked much about them.
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Galadriel aka Megan.
There is no such thing as too many books. Too few bookcases can become a problem, however.
Hello Matt's Grandma,
As a child I was much like Matt. One of the things my parents found was that my speech was a big clue to who I had been. Listin to the way he says things. He may have and accent or he may use words not traditionally used in your geographic location. Mine were very blatant, scottish, his may be as simple as me saying Soda and you calling it Pop. It may be of little or no help but it helped me.
Keep up your wonderful job! I'm proud to know Matt has people like you to care for and help him develop into the wonderful man he'll become.
Tamarisk
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To love you but once is a thought I shall not think. For I shall hold you in my heart for every life I live.
As a child I was much like Matt. One of the things my parents found was that my speech was a big clue to who I had been. Listin to the way he says things. He may have and accent or he may use words not traditionally used in your geographic location. Mine were very blatant, scottish, his may be as simple as me saying Soda and you calling it Pop. It may be of little or no help but it helped me.
Keep up your wonderful job! I'm proud to know Matt has people like you to care for and help him develop into the wonderful man he'll become.
Tamarisk
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To love you but once is a thought I shall not think. For I shall hold you in my heart for every life I live.
ibc_root_beer
New Member
Hi I'm a new member to this forum and I just wanted to say how much I enjoy reading about matthew. At first, I was a little taken aback and a bit skeptical but since I'm around kids a lot (i babysit frequently), I found it believable. Anyway, thanks for sharing your experience with us. I truly enjoy it.
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Bye!
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Bye!
Checking in. Matthew kinda acting weird (even for Matthew!). He is going from this sweet, loveable little boy to a hairpulling, ear twisting, neck choking 'heathen' then to a 16 yr old in disguise (wanting to take Stephanie and get married, get an apartment so they can have sex) and then to an overgrown one year old, that wants to be held & cuddled and then to a very, very scared little boy that cannot even go to the bathroom by himself. I am talking about all of this in a matter of minutes. Then, he'll come to me crying saying that he doesn't know whats wrong with him. I believe his behavior scares him alot. And by the time that I have finally figured out what 'phase' he is in, I am ready to wring his neck!! Every other sentence has something to do with his friend, like he'll saying my friend came to see me today, or my friend and I did this today and earlier today, Matthew was upset because today was the anniversary of his friends death. Saturday, while we were going down the road, Matthew wanted to sing us a song that he and his friend used to sing alot. He asked us to turn the radio down so we could hear him. And he sang a song. Not any song that I have ever heard, but a song about, well, something about the trees growing and people cutting them down before more could grow. And how we needed to take care of the earth. We passed the Defense General Supply Center (they have some old airplanes and tanks out in front of the buildings) and Matthew pointed to one of them talking about he can remember riding in one like that. I figured that I would trick him and asked him if he rode in that one. He told me that he didn't get a chance to see the numbers? on the side, but he doubted it was the same one. Ok, jokes on me!
[This message has been edited by mattsgma (edited 04-15-2002).]
[This message has been edited by mattsgma (edited 04-15-2002).]
i just read all the post on this topic and i am just dumbfounded..how old is matthew and when did he start doing these things...he sounds like a very interesting child..does his brother scott see the same things or have simalar experience...my son cody use to say weird things..he use to tell me about his wife and four kids and always talked about his son andrew and after andrew died he quit talking about him...but it interesting matthew doesn't seem to just remeber things he seems more clairvouynt...i would like to hear more....
Just wanted to see how Matthew is doing and if Scotty is following in his footsteps. I have been following this thread since the day I found this site, and I feel more prepared incase my own children need my support when I become a mother. Y'all are doing a wonderful job with Matthew and he is blessed for having such a wonderful understanding family. Keep up the good work!!
Stacey (Matt's Aunt-to-be) called me today and told me that Sylvia Brown was on Montel today. She said that Sylvia was shown a picture of what a member of the audience thought was a spirit. And that Sylvia had confirmed it. The 'spirit' in the picture was just like the one that I had written about earlier. The one that I took while Matthew was in the pool, and a figure was leaning on the ladder. Gave me goosebumps. As far as the ?'s go in the posts above: Matthew will be 5 yrs old in September. He started talking about 'his friend' before he was 2 yrs old. But we didn't think anything of it, until we realized that he was talking about his death. (Almost 3 yrs old, maybe) Scotty is completely different from Matthew, except in looks. The two look so much alike that sometimes you have to look at them twice to make sure which one you are talking to. Scotty is 16 months old and he hasn't really started talking yet. When Matthew was 8 months old, his mom had come in from VA Beach to visit him and when she left, he said 'Moma's bye-bye'. On his second birthday, we went to a local guik stop store and a woman was in Matthews way. He looked at her and said 'cuse me'. Scotty (I believe) is gonna be more of a con artist. The only sign of doing things like Matthew did, or is doing, is sometimes, Scotty will look towards the overhead light and start laughing. He doesn't say a whole lot, so we are not sure what he is thinking. When Matthew was Scotty's age, he was talking about skeet shooting and how his friend hit him on the back of his head with a shovel and how it eventually killed him. I really don't think that Scotty will 'do things' like Matthew. But, the way I look at it is, God doesn't give you more than you can handle and he just figured Matthew had really put us through the test.
Matthew's Uncle Bryan graduated from Hampden-Sydney College yesterday (5/12). Matthew met Rusty Wallace, the nascar driver, and had his picture taken with him. (Rusty's son went to college with Bryan). Tonight, Matthew went to Brandy (his mom) and told her that he had seen a ghost. (We have kinda figured out when this stuff is serious and when Matthew just 'says' things.) Matthew said that he walked right in front of her and couldn't understand why Brandy didn't see it too. Brandy asked him what the ghost looked like. He told her that the ghost was a man, wore black clothing but had a white long hat covering his head. He told her the eye holes were big enough to wear he could see that the man wore glasses. He also told her that the man kinda hopped when he walked. Like one of his legs or feet were hurting. Oh yeah, Matthew also said that the man had a beer in one hand and a bottle of liguor in his pocket. Brandy took this very seriously because when telling me, she looked like she wanted to cry. She said that it had the same kind of impact on Matthew. I am assuming that the white hat thing was like something from the KKK. But didn't they all wear white robes?
Matthew waking up the past few nights crying saying that Scotty (his 17 month old brother)had gotten hit by a train. He is so intense when he has these dreams. And we have a hard time getting him to go back to sleep. He has spent the night at his Uncle Bryan's apartment and still has the same type of dream there. He doesn't want me out of his sight and tells me constantly about the people that want to come to kidnap him. Something about them not wanting money. They just want to know what he knows. Tells me that they are going to come when we don't expect them. I cannot figure out where he is coming from.
Hi Mattsgrma,
Have you tried putting a blue night light in his room? It has wonderful calming and healing effects with children.
Are you aware of your energy when you come into the room to comfort him? Stay calm..be strong and project peaceful loving and healing energy to him as you talk to him.
In the morning have him draw a picture of his dreams..if he remembers them. Then encourage him to tell you what is in the picture. Don't lead him with your words. Just ask him to TELL YOU what he has drawn. This may help you to get to the bottom of his visions - at least a little.
If he doesn't remember - ask him to draw you a train. If he will -it might jar his memory to talk about it again.
Love him...be open..keep notes - and journall
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Deborah
If I could make a statement about what is real, the best I could do, is tell you how I feel.
Have you tried putting a blue night light in his room? It has wonderful calming and healing effects with children.
Are you aware of your energy when you come into the room to comfort him? Stay calm..be strong and project peaceful loving and healing energy to him as you talk to him.
In the morning have him draw a picture of his dreams..if he remembers them. Then encourage him to tell you what is in the picture. Don't lead him with your words. Just ask him to TELL YOU what he has drawn. This may help you to get to the bottom of his visions - at least a little.
If he doesn't remember - ask him to draw you a train. If he will -it might jar his memory to talk about it again.
Love him...be open..keep notes - and journall
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Deborah
If I could make a statement about what is real, the best I could do, is tell you how I feel.
J
Jim Pearson
Guest
Dear Matt's Gramma,
Two quick things I wanted to point out:
First, on January 27, 1967, there was an accident in which the first planned mission to the moon ended in the fiery death of three astronauts (Virgil Grissom, Edward White, and Roger Chaffee). The accident occured during a test before the actual blast-off was scheduled, and none of the men were named "Mike", but I thought you might want to know anyhow. It was the first thing I thought of when I read your earlier post.
Second, I have son about your age who suffers from many of the same troubles you described. We have found three things that helped that I don't know what we would have done without. Others have suggested the first, which is to encourage your grandson to draw. Another is music; we got our boy a small piano that he loves and it seems to help and he seems to un-wind while he plays with it. Last is a simple little method that a friend told us about (it uses the hands and imagination). My wife walks him through it sometimes and the results have been astounding (I actually get to sleep sometimes now). It is described on a free website called www.hamr.com.
Anyhow, I wish you and Matt the best and want to thank you for sharing with us. I don't feel so alone.
Kindest regards,
Jim Pearson
Two quick things I wanted to point out:
First, on January 27, 1967, there was an accident in which the first planned mission to the moon ended in the fiery death of three astronauts (Virgil Grissom, Edward White, and Roger Chaffee). The accident occured during a test before the actual blast-off was scheduled, and none of the men were named "Mike", but I thought you might want to know anyhow. It was the first thing I thought of when I read your earlier post.
Second, I have son about your age who suffers from many of the same troubles you described. We have found three things that helped that I don't know what we would have done without. Others have suggested the first, which is to encourage your grandson to draw. Another is music; we got our boy a small piano that he loves and it seems to help and he seems to un-wind while he plays with it. Last is a simple little method that a friend told us about (it uses the hands and imagination). My wife walks him through it sometimes and the results have been astounding (I actually get to sleep sometimes now). It is described on a free website called www.hamr.com.
Anyhow, I wish you and Matt the best and want to thank you for sharing with us. I don't feel so alone.
Kindest regards,
Jim Pearson
Checking in. Matt graduated from preschool last night. (He starts a 'summer school pre kindergarten' class in July & goes to kindergarten in September). On the way to the graduation ceremony, I looked over at Matthew. He was crying. When I asked him why, he said that he wished that there was some way that he could either stay in preschool and stay 4 yrs old or go directly to being an adult. He didn't want to go through the middle part again. Tonight, he was riding his bike and pulled up to where we were and said that he can remember helping his friend fix a bike. We asked when that happened and he told us between 5 and 8 yrs ago, then he took off riding again.
nexus
Senior Registered
Good to see you're still here!
This little guy reminds me of my son at his age.
He, too was reluctant to "grow up".
I sure hope you are recording this somehwere or keeping a journal.Jordy is now 19 and very(publicly)skeptical about all this.
As late as his first year of high school he wrote about his unusual experiences with time standing still etc...but when the "peer pressure" thing got to him,he has attempted to put it ,not aside I'd say..but IN side.
His teen years have been hard on him in the sense of the pressures of society.
Children are the purest source of "memories" of this sort.
I wish I had recorded more.It was an awakening for me..I'm telling you..and it would have been a valuable legacy to pass on to Jordy when he is ready again to look more deeply in to his life.
Fantastic, isn't it??!!
Nexus
"I am a part of all that I have met"
Alfred Lord Tennyson
[This message has been edited by nexus (edited 06-08-2002).]
This little guy reminds me of my son at his age.
He, too was reluctant to "grow up".
I sure hope you are recording this somehwere or keeping a journal.Jordy is now 19 and very(publicly)skeptical about all this.
As late as his first year of high school he wrote about his unusual experiences with time standing still etc...but when the "peer pressure" thing got to him,he has attempted to put it ,not aside I'd say..but IN side.
His teen years have been hard on him in the sense of the pressures of society.
Children are the purest source of "memories" of this sort.
I wish I had recorded more.It was an awakening for me..I'm telling you..and it would have been a valuable legacy to pass on to Jordy when he is ready again to look more deeply in to his life.
Fantastic, isn't it??!!
Nexus
"I am a part of all that I have met"
Alfred Lord Tennyson
[This message has been edited by nexus (edited 06-08-2002).]
I keep a record of just about everything that Matthew does or says. But in order to save it all, I would have to go around with a tablet and pen in my hands at all times. The main 'diary' I have for him are these post. As a matter of fact, he is the one telling me that I need to keep a diary for me about our lives together. He said "who knows, one day it might make a great book". I need to know something. I have had 3 different types of cancer (skin, breast and vaginal) in the past few years and now I have another spot on my head. Do you think that Matthew thinks that something is going to happen to me and thats why he doesn't want to get out of my sight? I never feel good anymore and sometimes it takes everything I have to even get out of bed. Do you think that he senses this somehow, because we haven't talked about this with him at all.
DreamFairie
Senior Registered
Hi MattsGma, I just finished reading through all of these posts about Matt and am enjoying hearing about all of Matt's and your own experiences in dealing with this very special child! To answer your most recent question and concern... From what I have read, it seems that Matt has a lot of people coming and going from his life and you are the one stable stronghold he has. His father is not around, his Mother does not live with all of you? I am just trying to get a little bit clearer picture of the things going on around Matt right now.
It's possible he may know something about the future, but it also possible he is adressing his very basic fears and concerns of someday having you go away from him too. It sounds as though it's been a very stressful year for the little guy. We as adults often don't realize that the stresses of our busy lives lives affect children too. We seem to take the stress in stride, accept it and things that we no longer even think of as stressful, we just assume that the children are managing it as well as us. Sorry to ramble off like this but, it does sound to me like Matt has a whole lot of things going on for such a little guy to handle!
It's possible he may know something about the future, but it also possible he is adressing his very basic fears and concerns of someday having you go away from him too. It sounds as though it's been a very stressful year for the little guy. We as adults often don't realize that the stresses of our busy lives lives affect children too. We seem to take the stress in stride, accept it and things that we no longer even think of as stressful, we just assume that the children are managing it as well as us. Sorry to ramble off like this but, it does sound to me like Matt has a whole lot of things going on for such a little guy to handle!
T
terron
Guest
If Matt has more spells of acting unlike himself and not knowing what's wrong with him, as discribed in the 4/15 post, I would wonder if he is being influenced by someone outside himself. He is obviously very sensitive and he could be picking up stuff from others whether they are physically alive or not and whether they are deliberately trying to influence him or not. It wouldn't hurt to teach him some kind of a prayer for protection from anything that is not good for him and, of course to pray for him yourself. Terron
Matthew talking alot about another friend, this is the first one he hasn't called Mike. This ones name is Jerry. I am assuming that Jerry is a male, but Matthew hasn't really said. He talks about how he and Jerry lived in Richmond, Carolina (no mention of north or south) and how they visited New York, where they went swimming without any clothes on. Now, he knows that we live in Richmond, VA and when I ask him if he means Virginia, he insists that it is Carolina. He really is being full of himself and acting out a lot of things. I guess the most acted out one would be when he does some kind of kickboxing? and starts jabbering. We ask him what he is saying and all he says is that it is spanish.
There is a Richmond County, North Carolina, toward the coast on the border with South Carolina. The county seat is Rockingham. There is no Richmond in South Carolina that I ever heard of, and I'm a native.
For those unfamiliar with the rural southern United States, maybe I should mention that it's not unusual for people who don't live in a town to identify themselves as from whatever county.
For those unfamiliar with the rural southern United States, maybe I should mention that it's not unusual for people who don't live in a town to identify themselves as from whatever county.
I think that Matt senses something is coming. And from his reacting it doesn't seem to be something good. You mentioned him being afraid of the man standing on your front lawn and him saying people wanted to kidnap him to see what he knows. Maybe he really has some incite that should not be ignored. I am not trying to scare you or anything, but it is definitely something to look into. Maybe ask him some more about it. You may find that these "kidnappers" he speaks of are people that know of his gift and want to use it for their own purposes.
Okay, after what has happened today, I think that I have had enough! Matthew brought something to me today. It is a patch of some kind, kind of a mushroom shaped top to it and going down to a point, kind of like an upside down teardrop looking patch. Looks like it could have gone on a jacket. It has a dark green background with a gold eagle with something in its claws and a square gold box where the eagles stomach would be. When I asked him about it, all he could tell me was that it was from the 'Screaming Eagles'. Asked around in the family, figuring maybe, just maybe, someone knew whose this was, what it meant or where it came from and no-one around here has seen it before. I kept asking everyone and Matthew kept telling me it is from the 'Screaming Eagles". Does this patch sound familar to anyone?!
[This message has been edited by mattsgma (edited 06-19-2002).]
[This message has been edited by mattsgma (edited 06-19-2002).]
C
CrowEyes
Guest
There was a US 101st Air Division in the Vietnam War called The Screaming Eagles. Don't know if there is a connection to that or not.
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Love,
CrowEyes
In order to have a pocket full of dreams...one must first have a hand filled with vision.
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Love,
CrowEyes
In order to have a pocket full of dreams...one must first have a hand filled with vision.
Galadriel
Senior Registered
I looked up a Screaming Eagles website, and didn't see anything like what you described. There was one patch that kind of looked like the right shape, but it had a skull & crossbones on it. The Eagle patches were standard shields with only the eagle heads on them. That said, it shouldn't necessarily detract from what Matt is saying. It could be that it reminds him of the patch. I also didn't serch very far, as it's 1 am here, and I have to work in 9 hours.
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There is no such thing as too many books. Too few bookcases can become a problem, however.
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There is no such thing as too many books. Too few bookcases can become a problem, however.
Hi. It has been a long time, hasn't it?! Matthew is doing well. He 'graduated' from Pre-K summer school last Thursday and he is already bored. I haven't been feeling very good lately though. The skin cancer sore on my head is turning red everytime I go out in the sun, whether it is to go to the dragstrip or to hang out clothes). I just don't feel like myself, don't want to do anything, go anywhere, or even get on the computer. Must be the age thing kickin' in!! (I turned 43 yrs old in June). Matthew still talking about his friend and New York. He went near Roanoke, Va for his vacation (spent the weekend at his Uncle Bryan's wife's grandparents house (got that?) Bryan & Stacey said that everyone there loved Matt and wanted him to stay, even invited him to come back anytime he wants to. He has gone to Maryland to the dragstrip a couple of times this summer and hanging around with Bryan & Stacey, they keep him busy all the time. He has his own room at thier apartment complete with computer and the accessories, color tv with a playstation and a recently added phone of his own. We have recently 'discovered' ebay on the computer and now Matthew is trying to collect all the dragstrip cars that he can find. He starts regular school right after Labor Day and I believe, contrary to what I have written in the past) that Matthew is going to be okay. He still 'refuses' to ride the bus, but luckily we live close enough to take him until he gets more comfortable. Matthew is very jealous of his little brother, Scotty. But, we are trying to deal with that issue too!!
I am new to this board and have read a few of your posts, going back to 2001. Based on my experience, I would suggest that you try to treat Matt as "normally" as possible without calling attention to his memories, but not dismissing them when he brings them up. They are his and they are real.
We experienced the same sort of thing with our son and he eventually just left the memories behind, or at least stopped talking about them. I often feel the urge to bring them up, but do not as I do not want to contaminate the process of his life. He is 21 now, married, and a beautiful, deep, human being.
You may be certain that if he ever brings up his past life I will be ready to confirm what I remember (vividly) from his childhood, but I feel like it is wrong to push it. Memories are too easy to contaminate. The human mind tries to create a reality out of fragments, and while that "reality" may have deep emotional reality the details are almost certain to be mixed up once one tries to get too close to them.
Those mixed up details can serve the purpose of isolating one from peers, interfering with the process of life.
We experienced the same sort of thing with our son and he eventually just left the memories behind, or at least stopped talking about them. I often feel the urge to bring them up, but do not as I do not want to contaminate the process of his life. He is 21 now, married, and a beautiful, deep, human being.
You may be certain that if he ever brings up his past life I will be ready to confirm what I remember (vividly) from his childhood, but I feel like it is wrong to push it. Memories are too easy to contaminate. The human mind tries to create a reality out of fragments, and while that "reality" may have deep emotional reality the details are almost certain to be mixed up once one tries to get too close to them.
Those mixed up details can serve the purpose of isolating one from peers, interfering with the process of life.