sensitivity & mental illness

[Jaimie]

Hi, would like to share my past life experiences here on the topic of sensitivity and mental illness. Maybe I am not alone with this. I have always been, I suppose, sensitive. All my life I have had someone else's feelings of depression. I can't describe it any other way. When I was a kid I was a jolly one, and suddenly it would come over me to only breath it's darkness to then vanish, within seconds or minutes.
As I later learned trough past life memories I had been a woman who had several times struggled with depression in her life, one time as a result from rape by a boyfriend when she was young, ( which I found strong proof of ), but it was something that would occur also later in her life when she had been in a crises too long. What is important to say is that she also bounced back. So that was the most recent past life.
As I've done a journey further back I could see 2 more lives that involved a struggle with mental illness: Depression seem to have been the common thing. I try to work my way around it if and when it comes up during meditation.
In this life I feel blessed that I no longer have it, and have a respect of talking about it early with anyone, taking the symptoms seriously if I see someone hurting, and the knowing that everyone can get this and it is nothing to be ashamed about, even if that too is part of the illness. I feel, at least where we live, that society has learned more about this than the yesterdays. I think one of the mistakes my past life self did was believing she was weaker than she actually was, and trusting her life in the hands of others, where someone who was very close and dominating abused, knowingly or not, and she was trapped. She had a very complex relationship with this someone, but was in the end able to break free.

/Jaimie

 

[Eva1942]

Yup! I struggled with Depression and still sometimes struggle with Anxiety sometimes. It’s a Empath thing and is because as a Sensitive our eyes are more open to not what’s just on the surface but underneath. We can see the hurt in the world, and that hurts us.

My guide said to me the other day when I went to them in despair about the way the Holocaust is being taught in Australia :

“I know you wish to change the world, but you can’t. There is too much hate and fear in the world. People cannot accept that the people who are your (linear) age who wish to teach about certain subjects (such as the Holocaust) is not simply an interest. It is something they have LIVED THROUGH in a past life and they want to bring that knowledge forward to teach. But untill the world becomes more open, you will ever only be part of a minority”.

I don’t belong here either, so I know how you feel.

Eva x

 

[Jaimie]

Hi Eva, I am sorry though that you have struggled and struggle with this. With me I could feel past life self me's fear of what was going on in my head, why I had lost control, the fear was the worst ( anxiety ) and of getting worse. Like being thrown out of a carousel high up in the air.

I have in some ways by now been able to distinguish the different kinds of mental illness past life me had by reading about it and see where it would fit in. I could tell when I died in the 1920's by drowning that I was not "deranged" as they said in those days, but I did have depression and anxiety ( I think one called it being nervous back then ? a little bit jumpy ? ).

I did remember one time, in my most recent past life, when I had rushed out of my apartment at a strange hour when I knew no one else would be out, because I was afraid of people back then. Every sound was like 10 times worse than it actually was. My fear and not being able to be around people, definitely not several of them moving around me was also apparent in the life that ended in the 1920's. In my most recent life when rushing outside my place I would have clear moments and confused moments. I would have panic attacks. So I got to a phone booth and I remember calling my ex husband somewhere between the clarity and confusion. I must have been pretty desperate to do that. He spent time trying to reassure me that no child was in danger as I was having PTSD ? alongside with it, re-living the nightmare when an ex had treated our child very badly and I had failed to protect this child, something I don't think I could handle, and it came through in the night so I most definitely think I was heavily sleep deprived and would later hold on to my sleeping pills for dear life, knowing without sleep I would slip into confusion. When I was that confused I knew there was something seriously wrong with me, could not keep anything in the head for long at all, and when clarity came back I had to hurry up before slipping again. If I am right about this I think past life me slipped right into a psychotic state of mind.

I was ready to dismiss the entire phone booth incident when it entered my memory trying to calm myself down saying why on earth would I not, for instance, have my own phone in my apartment ? Much, much later my chin dropped as I was able to get hold of the information that she had in fact not her own phone, but would go outside to a phone booth near by...

Overall when I have not felt the mental illness come creeping up on me in my past selves I had a short way to laughter . I have many good memories, many laughs too from my past lives, so it is not all dark and gray, thankfully

/Jaimie