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People from a past life

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Lily2015

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Hi everyone.

I have learned and researched alot about people we've known from past lives that we meet today. I understand now and why, when meeting certain individuals we can feel fear or some love right away.

This one, I'm hoping for your thoughts and insight.

I started a new job several months ago. Initially I had a very bad feeling and couldn't understand why, as logically it was good in all other areas. Fast forward to today, and I see why.

The individual I work with when I first met them I didn't have a good feeling about. I dismissed it as I was feeling desperate to have a new job in my company. There was just something about him I didn't like. I pushed anything personal away and focused on business. Throughout the months that lead today, he has made comments and made me question myself as a worker. I'm very empathic, and felt like he was trying to have control and power over me as if he was better than me. I dismissed those because I'm very confident at what I do. Throughout the months that lead today he always shot down things I do or tries to prove me wrong and has me double check things. Which always I'm correct. But Then will say later how good I am.

I have noticed that there is something familiar about him, and one day I felt violated by something he said. Which then later turned into i couldnt even look at him. As he continues to make little comments or tries to be my friend, the more im repulsed by it, but remain professional. I have pushed myself away from any personal talk. What he does is this. Few weeks go by, business as usual. Then he starts drama. Then another few weeks go by, business as usual. Again. So i faked trying to be his friend and things are great no drama. Then i slowly pull away again and drama again. My coworker says he wants attn. I've been seeing a therapist and put together a document of all the things happening and she said this is a hostile work environment.

Did I know this man in a past life? And did he do some harm to me? I get it some people are just mean. I question myself with that "knowing and familiarity"
 
Hi Lilly, so sorry you're having a bad time at work. Stay strong! and confident, and by no means allow his behavior to distract you from your job. If this is a hostile work situation you should inform your HR department or supervisor.

Now regarding past lives. Well, sure it could be a past life situation; often times this is how people show up in our lives. But, like you said, he could just be a mean person. I want to believe that the thread that ties our lives with other people is more than coincidental. I think we encounter people, especially those that really impact us, for a reason. With this in mind, give it some thought; ask yourself "what am I suppose to learn?" Only you can determine the answer. And maybe you already have. Whatever you come up with do not let him do you harm this go round! Stay strong... ~Tman
 
What ^ said

It could be a past life thing, he could be a narcistic guy or both combined
But regardless of anything, don't let him get a hold over you and if he keeps it up, report him
Could be that's the lesson: breaking previous pattern
 
That is a good question. What am I supposed to learn? Does it make sense to not allow people to take my energy?? It would make sense based on the waves of his drama he causes. I always felt drained and defeated, and he seems to enjoy it. Which would make sense on the empath and narcissist relationship. He knows I'm confident and good at would at what I do, and he's pulling it from me for him. And making me doubt myself.

As for breaking the pattern,,,,,if he is from a past life he did this to me and won?
 
It makes perfect sense to not let people sap your energy, people can be bastards for all kinds of reasons but in your case I notice a pattern that just screams past life
It's a very good possibility that he's done this before in atleast one lifetime, there are some stories here about abuse that started in past lives and continue to the current, perhaps a search will help (or someone's willing to help with a link or 2 as I have no idea anymore where I found those threads)
This life could easily be about breaking or continuing the cycle of abuse, the fact that you're here and trying not to let him get to you suggests breaking that cycle
 
Lily2015 said:
What am I supposed to learn? Does it make sense to not allow people to take my energy?
Click to expand...
I wanted to share an example from my own memories that might give you some ideas. (This same person showed up as a temporary fling and I broke up with him in a later life, only to marry him this time around. I think I finally figured out why he kept showing up to repeat the abusive pattern, though. I needed to change my own attitude toward him.) http://reincarnationforum.com/threads/a-relationship-pattern-over-multiple-lives.4833/

Note: It's important that you not only have a mental image of what you're trying to do, but also an understanding of your part in the core problem you're no longer going to participate in. (For me it was a sense of responsibility for his moral choices e.g. trying to control him to become a better person.)

One thing that might be interesting is to try this activity and see if it changes how he behaves around you. I understand that sometimes the other end of the connection will change their behavior (maybe even lose interest in you) without you having to say a thing.
 
Hi mere dreamer. I have been asking for about a week now to show me. It came in a dream. I was a tiny person rI ding a tiny horse, so I could not get away from him fast enough. My guide said I'll continue to feel this way until he's told by authority he needs to stop. In my dream I saw another man telling him, and this guy continued to shrink while I grew again. That guy was wearing brown and a newsboy hat. I think we were both children and he was bullying me.
 
It does seem like it might be a repeat pattern, then. What an interesting memory!

One point, though. You are the authority. You own yourself. You own your space. You make the rules about how others are permitted to behave around you and enforce them.

Yes, people have their own will on the matter and some aren't easily diverted, but it's surprising how much of their behavior is influenced by our own reaction patterns. Do we flex under their pressure or stay firm? Do we call their bluffs or allow them to imagine they've tricked us? Do we point out their rudeness or expect them to figure it out on their own? Each intrusive person needs to be handled in a way that nullifies their approach or even rebounds it against them. These are skills, not "personality traits" which means you can learn how to do this, no matter who you are.

You might need to give up on being seen as "nice" (or other socially ingrained qualities) in order to project the firm boundaries of someone who deserves respect.

As long as there are hooks in your psyche for him to use, he will continue to attempt to manipulate you. Cutting cords is basically letting go of your side of the tug-of-war, even letting him "win" on fronts that only exist because you continue to engage in battle. If you shift perspective, there's no way he can take your autonomy away. You step out of the finite game of "proving who has power" and play the infinite game of simply having power without needing to prove it.

Like a child on the playground taunting you for having red hair, for example. If you feel bad about your hair, those taunts sink in deep. You avoid the playground. You avoid the taunting child. You review the situation constantly, looking for ways to prevent people from mocking your hair. You assume everyone is laughing at your hair even when they're just joking around about a book they've read. You dye your hair and still worry, because what if people realize it's red after all.

All of that self protective activity becomes the cord.

Sure, a teacher (authority) could muffle the bully, but it wouldn't change your vulnerability to that kind of mockery.

Cutting the cord is a shift in perspective to not only resisting the bully's attempts to manipulate you, but actually enjoying the fact that you have red hair to the extent that his attempts to mock you don't even register as mockery, but make him look foolish. The bully can say anything they want on the topic and it affects you not at all. If they don't like it, well, there are others who do. You own your self image, and therefore they have no power.

You may not need an outside authority at all. Or if you do (for things like stalking and such it may be necessary) they will only be effective in helping you feel safe if you've already figured out how your self protection patterns make you vulnerable, and firmed up ownership of your space, time, thoughts, and emotions.

Does that make sense?
 
Yes it all makes sense.

I had a bad feeling about starting this job, I didn't listen and I see why. But in this life, I have to work. My confidence has grown since he's been on vacation the past few days and I've been happy at work again. Being "nice" is who I am, being not nice just gets me in trouble.

At least I'm "nice" enough to provide documentation at work to HR about his behavior. I didn't cause any of it, he did. All I am doing is my "job"
 
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