• Thank you to Carol and Steve Bowman, the forum owners, for our new upgrade!

Civil War Confusion (merged)

Originally posted by Feech
There is something very dark about you concerning this Civil War incarnation... I do not mean evil, or that you or your current life are dark, but rather a darkness surrounding your knowledge of it and how you communicate it. It is as if we are not getting something about you.
Click to expand...

If most of the people you know don't believe in reincarnation,
and don't understand your fascination for a certain period in history, they might say you're obsessed or mentally troubled.
Then you try to find ways to justify you're interest, especially when you haven't met anyone yet who says: I fully understand what you're going through.

On this forum we can freely talk about our experiences, without having to explain again and again why we're so attracted to certain things and certain places.

When I started having my past life dreams I also was totally in it, like I didn't live in the 1980's but in the 1880's,
there were even times that I wanted to go back,
that I wish there weren't any cars,
and that I could wear again my past life 'working class clothes'.
I didn't even understand why I was female,
I didn't want to be cute and sweet,
I especially didn't want to have breasts ;)

When I look back now I can smile about it,
but I learned a lot from it, especially about myself.

Curious Girl.
 
I do not think of it as a particularly dark life. I think overall it was a good one until the end came to me or until the war anyway. Certainly this life has been far longer and more traumactic than that one ever was, a dark long journey through great emotional pain is how I'd describe it.
I've often thought that my connection with that life as well as possibly others ( I have a strong affinity for the 18th century as well ) is a reaction to the horrors of this one. So the darkness you picked up on may have been related to the present. I was also in a very sad mood when I wrote that and have recently been spending more time considering who I was. etc.
I do not think my death was instantanious and I know many of my friends died either that day or shortly before. Perhaps the sadness of lose from another time was what you were picking up on.
I know I have a vivid imagination and find picturing things fairly easy, therefore I try not to go into any great detail that may be the product of my imagination.. I do however feel confident that the general events or situation I described in my earlier post is accurate. I know I was a northerner as my sentiments are very strong and have either negative or totally nuetral feelinfgs toward the south., but whether I was from Iowa or Rhode Island is unclear as was my rank and where I was.
Interestingly though I had a bizarre experience regarding a TV actress that I had an unusual crush on. I became obsessed with this person for a few weeks and felt as if I were actually in love with her on a deep level. Of course , as I am not mad, I knew this was either some weird nuerosis or something totally out of the ordinaryl. Anyway to make a long story short i had several "visions", memories of a person who looked identical to the modern one , in dress of the mid 19th century and had a "revelation" of sorts that I was married to this person. Since then my obssesson with the actress of today has vanashed. I still find her somewhatattractive but not like I did prior to the "memory/"
I might add that she is not a super star, or model, nor one of those considered by mainstream culture to be "great beauties" by current standards if that makes sense. .So it wasn't a fantasy about Jessica Simpson, or Panela Anderson, or something ( both of whom I find rather unattractive )
Anyway its a bunch of little things that are slowly adding up bit by bit.
I do feel I left someone behind that was dear to me when I died and maybe even children. There is a great sadness connected to that , that I feel to the present.
 
Tommy, I am sorry for your losses.

I feel that I wasn't picking up on the past-life loss of friends. I feel sorrow for your losses, but that is not what I was feeling before. I believe the original thing you said is true: that I was picking up on the long dark passage that this life has been for you. I hope that not only does this life get much better and stay better for you, but that any past life memories, even ones of sorrow, give you comfort because they are of love.
 
Originally posted by curious_girl

When I started having my past life dreams I also was totally in it, like I didn't live in the 1980's but in the 1880's,
there were even times that I wanted to go back,
that I wish there weren't any cars,
and that I could wear again my past life 'working class clothes'.
I didn't even understand why I was female,
I didn't want to be cute and sweet,
I especially didn't want to have breasts ;)
Click to expand...

How true!!! The same thing happened to me, too. (I was a Confederate fifer in the Civil War, and I was accidentally shot in the First Battle of Bull Run.)
I especially miss my parents from that time, since they were very kind and loving, and I don't really get along with my present parents. I also miss my friends a lot, but I know that at least two of them share this life with me as well.
Who knows, Tommy, maybe you'll meet your friends and your wife and children again, too? If it helps you, then I hope so!
By the way, if you want to talk in private you can send me a private message, and I'll give you my e-mail address.

Regards,

Nathali
 
Ok let's see..you were an Union officer...hey maybe you were the guy that shot and killed me at Cedar Mountain, Virginia!! LOL Just kidding of course but stranger things have happened.

I can understand how you feel though. I have had periods were I have become obsessed with my Civil War life (more so than with others I am aware of) Just like Curious Girl I have wished there were no cars, no street lights, no noisy cities. I have wished I could always wear my plaid shirts and home spun trousers. I have wished I could quietly work at the mill and walk in the woods.

I think that particular life resonates with me the most because it was so short and ended so violently and needlesly. Also I felt I wanted to do so many things and ran out of time,
 
Civil War memories

:confused: I started having dreams as far back as I can remember as a child. I dreamed of being at a train depot. It was busy and crowded. It was the 1800's. I always heard a baby crying. The closer the train the louder the crying. Then I'm deaming I'm riding across the prarie on my horse,going to this shack in the distance. The shack was a saloon in the middle of nowhere.There was a woman there. I remember she was a *****. Iremember being with her. My next dream is, I'm fighting my way up a place called Round Top.Later I find out that Round Top is at Gettysburg. I was taken prisoner by some people from N.Y..Iremember being in one of there prisons. I remember the hate I feel for them. The next memory I have I'm on a scaffold with a rope around my neck. The said because of my war crimes. I've had people come up to me in this life, and say You were a bad one. People I don't even know react hostile to me for no known reason. I've become a recluse becaus, I don't make friends easily. I wish I could understand why. I'm not a bad person in this life. Paula
 
I know it's hard to let go of our past sometimes, but you need to understand, no matter what other people say, you're not a bad person. I believe we all are "bad" people at one time or another. You might like this thread in our archives about civil war memories (It has 2 pages worth.)
 
Welcome to the forum, Paula. :)

It sounds to me like your past has intruded on your present. That can happen so easily with strong memories and it can make life very difficult.
To children in school, the civil war seems ancient, but in reality we are only talking about 140 years ago, a drop in the bucket of time.

Do you feel you are still carrying some of the hatred and the issues from that time?

Also, have you retraced your past life steps in the history books? Or studied the culteral beliefs and situations of that time period? Sometimes understanding more about the circumstances of that life and how events came to happen can help us move past the negative effects of the life. :)
 
Hi paula,

Welcome! Chelle and Littlemoon have given you some excellent advice! Researching your past lives can definitely help you figure out some of the issues you're dealing with today, and why you feel the way that you do.
Regardless if you were a "bad" person in another life, this is a new life, with a fresh slate...full of possibilities. :D One of the reasons we live different lives is to learn certain lessons and bring forth that knowledge into each new life. What we do with that knowledge is up to us. ;)


Ailish :)
 
I think I have a pretty good understanding of why I feel the wat I did toward the union.I don't believe I was a big slave holder or anything. I believe I came from humble beginings. I think what had me so upset is that they were going to destroy our enconomy. We all knew slavery was on the way out. But they wouldn't comprimise, ande phase it out over the period of 10 years. Ten years after the begining of the war Eli Whitney invented the cotton Gin. My crop was all I had. I feel I was from Arkansas. And in this life I am the decendent of four Civil War Veterans out of Camden Arkansas. I look around the south in this day in age,and it appears to me we are still in reconstruction even to this day. Look at the schools, and are floundering industries. Blacks in alot of cases are not any better off today. They still make of the largest % of poverty in the south. I by no means condone slavery. But I think before they destroy the entire southern economy, they neede to come to a compromise. There is a book called A Legacy Lost. This book sugest that we are reincarnted within the same families. Paula
 
Civil War ---I just shocked myself

Years ago, 2001, I meditated and came up with a name William Bradford. I knew he/I was a civil war officer for the Union. That was then.... and this was today......, during a relaxation massage, I used a techinque to try to see a past live. I got on a cloud and raised to a level high above the earth. When my cloud lowed I would go/try to go to a past live. I was hung up on the decent and kept thinking, no not this live/time, not this one, until I got one that I wanted. Bang, the name Willaim Bradford came back to me. I know he was from or was in Pennsylvania, and was a Captain married to Sarah. I just did a google search for "willaim bradford, civil war" and found: A Free Genealogy Biography of William Bradford Sprague Pennsylvania Volunteer of the Civil War. He was a captain and married to Sarah. It didn't say he played panio but I know he did.

Was this me? What is the probabality that I picked these random variables during a relaxation massage and they all pieced together perfectly: willaim, bradford, captain, married to sarah, pennsylvania....?

Jason
 
Hi Jason,
It's good to 'see' you again. :thumbsup:

There's always the possibility that it's just something random that our mind throws at us.......or not! Very often I find that these feelings of deep shock come when we're confronted with something that isn't random - just buried deep. And then I always go into research mode and do everything I can to find out more, coupled with meditations to see if I can come up with more memories. And believe me you might end up with a lot more facts that'll blow you away. :D

I've also found that in many cases there seems to be long gaps between bits of information. As if we're given a little then have to wait a year or two before we're allowed the next glimpse of something.
Hope everything is going well.
Gemeni.
 
As an FYI, there was also a Major William F. Bradford who is fairly well-known. I have no idea what his wife's name was, or if he was even married.
 
HI Jason,

Long time no see. ;) Have you done any more research on this? Have you had any more experiences? I hope you have written it all down and are actively looking for more clues. The fact that you remember him playing the piano is excellent. Perhaps you can get confirmation with that small detail.

To me it is the little things that validate. Not the big historical facts - but the small things - things no one else today would have any way of knowing.

Good luck with your search!
 
No I haven't

Deborah,

I have been quite busy with my master's degree program. I am taking four classes and will be done before Christmas. Also I will be moving before Christmas too.

I hope I will have some "free" time soon.

Jason
 
Hi Jason! :)

I agree with Deborah that it is the little things that validade... The fact that you know that you/William played the piano in your dream can be a good sign that you were actually having a PL memory...
I am curious, do you play the piano in your present life?
 
Have You Been to PA?

:) The Civil War battlefields like Gettysburg are very spiritual places. Any locations beyond his home? Details? I live nearby.
 
Piano and PA

I only kind of play piano. It's really hard for my to read piano music when I through in the bass line. I can hear it perfectly though. I love the score to the original Phantom of the Opera by ALW. I never had lessons.

I have been to Gettysburg, but it didn't invoke much of anything. It just seemed cold/old/abandoned. Maybe I was "out of touch" when I was passing through there.

Jason
 
My Revolutionary War Connection: Putnam Park

With reference to the associations with battlefields, I spent considerable time visiting a similar haunt in Connecticut where Revolutionary War troops spent several cold winters: Punam Park near Redding. I was very young during these visits but my mother said that I would actually ask to go there. I have vivid memories of the place and was intrigued by the line of "fire pits" along the roads: piles of rocks where huge fires were lit to try to keep everyone warm. These indeed felt "cold and abandoned" now and were obviously quite old. The defensive nature of the land was also very obvious with some natural battlements like Gettysburg. I always felt I was ushered in and ushered out by something even when I was alone to explore the place. "Speachless" and "numb" are two poignant adjectives that also come to my mind. A graveyard on a massive scale. :cool
 
You must log in or register to reply here.
Back
Top