I had an interesting and confusing conversation with my son the night before last. He is six years old and normally I don't lay down with him while he falls asleep, but the other night he asked me to, so I did. He complained about his elbow hurting, and then we chit-chatted about an upcoming vacation we might take to the mountains.
He asked me if we could see wolves. He said he was at his house in the mountains and he got scratched by a wolf in the elbow and that was why it was hurting. First he said he had gone outside and was attacked by the wolf and then he said the wolf came through his bedroom window.
I asked him about his house and he said he would ask his dad if we could live there. He said he wasn't talking about Daddy, but his other dad that lives at the mountain house.
I can't remember the exact conversation after that, but here's a summary. His other dad liked to be called Dad, not Daddy, and they lived in a house in the mountains close to water. He said he had a phone, so he could call and ask if we could come live there, but that his dad was probably about to die. I asked how did he die, and he said he got into a fight with another man and died. When it came up again later in the conversation, I asked him if he was fighting in a ring or if the other man came to his house. He said in a ring and he watched it on tv, but then he said his dad didn't die the other man did.
At this point, he buried his head in his pillow for a moment, then lifted his head up and said he remembered something bad that happened to him at the house. I asked him what happened? He said some wolves came through his window and scratched his bed. I asked him if he was in the bed. He said he was and they scratched him and he died. Then he said that they (meaning people i think, not wolves) buried him
and he got up from where he was buried and went back in the house.
He got a little upset after this, thrashed around a bit, buried his head in the pillow, and then started hitting himself in the head. I asked him what he was doing, and he said trying to get the bad thoughts to go away. I asked him if he wanted to talk about it some more, he said yes.
Then his story changed a little, and he said he killed the wolf, the wolf didn't kill him, but then they were killed when the house exploded. He said the house exploded when he shot one of the wolves with his gun, because there was a bomb in the gun. He said his dad ran outside when the house exploded.
Then he said the house didn't explode, because it was silver on the inside and outside.
He said he wanted to go to the mountains where he lived and see his dad again. Then he turned over and went to sleep.
This isn't the first time the wolf/gun imagery has come up. There was one time probably about 8 months ago when he was playing with his little brother's three little pigs playset. The playset is a set of three houses that nest and doors that lock/unlock with a key. There are figures for the pigs and the big bad wolf. The largest house has a chimney that opens so the wolf can go down it. He had the largest house and was stuffing action figures and small toys in the house using the big bad wolf figure to shove them down the chimney. I asked him what he was doing and he said these people are dead, the wolf killed them. I asked him how the wolf killed them and he said the wolf shot them with a gun. This is the only time that his play has unnerved me a bit.
I don't think that he was making all of this up. He has an active imagination, but normally when he's making something up, he talks excitedly and ends up laughing and you can't really understand what he is saying. That night, he seemed agitated and upset and was almost crying at times. But why would his story change? Is it that the memories are just hazy and he can't remember exactly or could it be that the memory was so upsetting and he is trying to change it to be less upsetting (i.e. the wolf didn't kill me I killed him)? It also seems to me that what he described could be several different memories mixed up together.
He asked me if we could see wolves. He said he was at his house in the mountains and he got scratched by a wolf in the elbow and that was why it was hurting. First he said he had gone outside and was attacked by the wolf and then he said the wolf came through his bedroom window.
I asked him about his house and he said he would ask his dad if we could live there. He said he wasn't talking about Daddy, but his other dad that lives at the mountain house.
I can't remember the exact conversation after that, but here's a summary. His other dad liked to be called Dad, not Daddy, and they lived in a house in the mountains close to water. He said he had a phone, so he could call and ask if we could come live there, but that his dad was probably about to die. I asked how did he die, and he said he got into a fight with another man and died. When it came up again later in the conversation, I asked him if he was fighting in a ring or if the other man came to his house. He said in a ring and he watched it on tv, but then he said his dad didn't die the other man did.
At this point, he buried his head in his pillow for a moment, then lifted his head up and said he remembered something bad that happened to him at the house. I asked him what happened? He said some wolves came through his window and scratched his bed. I asked him if he was in the bed. He said he was and they scratched him and he died. Then he said that they (meaning people i think, not wolves) buried him
and he got up from where he was buried and went back in the house.
He got a little upset after this, thrashed around a bit, buried his head in the pillow, and then started hitting himself in the head. I asked him what he was doing, and he said trying to get the bad thoughts to go away. I asked him if he wanted to talk about it some more, he said yes.
Then his story changed a little, and he said he killed the wolf, the wolf didn't kill him, but then they were killed when the house exploded. He said the house exploded when he shot one of the wolves with his gun, because there was a bomb in the gun. He said his dad ran outside when the house exploded.
Then he said the house didn't explode, because it was silver on the inside and outside.
He said he wanted to go to the mountains where he lived and see his dad again. Then he turned over and went to sleep.
This isn't the first time the wolf/gun imagery has come up. There was one time probably about 8 months ago when he was playing with his little brother's three little pigs playset. The playset is a set of three houses that nest and doors that lock/unlock with a key. There are figures for the pigs and the big bad wolf. The largest house has a chimney that opens so the wolf can go down it. He had the largest house and was stuffing action figures and small toys in the house using the big bad wolf figure to shove them down the chimney. I asked him what he was doing and he said these people are dead, the wolf killed them. I asked him how the wolf killed them and he said the wolf shot them with a gun. This is the only time that his play has unnerved me a bit.
I don't think that he was making all of this up. He has an active imagination, but normally when he's making something up, he talks excitedly and ends up laughing and you can't really understand what he is saying. That night, he seemed agitated and upset and was almost crying at times. But why would his story change? Is it that the memories are just hazy and he can't remember exactly or could it be that the memory was so upsetting and he is trying to change it to be less upsetting (i.e. the wolf didn't kill me I killed him)? It also seems to me that what he described could be several different memories mixed up together.
