How much "remembering" do I encourage (scary past life)?

[lostrin]

My 3 yr old is very chatty. One night she blurted out, "You know when Natalie (her baby sister) was a baby, she had a vagina and some ladies came and cut it." After my realization that it was a past life recall I asked her what happened after that incident and she said, "the girls drank some water."

This was about a month ago. Every so often I will bring it up again (bad move?) and she never ever waivers from her story, including the part about the water. I then wondered if she could be mixing up present situations with past life stuff. For example, I had a home birth and explained that the imbilical cord needs to be cut which forms a scab, etc. I also had 2 midwives at the house. I asked her last night if she meant Natalie's umbilical cord. This was her reply:
"Mommy, I have to ask you a question." She then leaned over and whispered in my ear, "Two ladies came and cut Natalie's vagina." Not a question, I know but so insistent on the original story. She went on to say that it scared her and was wondering if the ladies were coming to her house. That's when I knew I may have really increased the trauma for this poor sweet girl. I was acting like it was a novelty to have her describe her past lives when she is obviously fraught over the memory.
My question is: how much do I get her to talk about it? Do I drop it? Do I never bring it up? What if she brings it up?
I tried to reassure her that the ladies would not hurt her in this life etc etc. My husband figures it must have been the last life since it is so fresh. I would really like to know if there are any good books out there to help me deal with this, not just books that describe case studies. This is NB because I have to think about when the baby eventually remembers it since it was her trauma. Thanks

 

[DJ]

Lostrin,

Your daughter sounds as if she is "confusing" her recent past life with this one.
The situation she describes sounds like female circumcision, which is widely practiced in some countries.
I would not recommend asking her about it out of the blue, but, if either one of your daughters brings it up in the future, reassure her/them that it was the *past*, and they are safe now.

Peace to you,
DJ

 

[deborah]

HI Lostrin,

I am assuming you have read Carol's book?

If not you should start there.

If curiosity has you by the tail, have you tried meditating on it yourself? Many a person has been surprised as to the answers found in meditation. This then would not upset your daughter -- but would ease your curiosity.

Love,
Deborah

 

[tish]

Just a question, do you watch Oprah? The reason I ask is because she just did a show on female circumcision a few weeks ago and maybe your daughter happened to catch some of it. Not trying to doubt your word, just offering a possibility.

 

[Peter V]

Even when childern have pleasent past life memories, I don't think parents should try and "get things out of them". They may soon feel like they are under pressure to "produce" and start fabricating things just to please the parents. Probably the best thing a parent can do in these situations is just be there to talk to when the child feels like he/she would like to talk about it. Just support them when they need it, but don't let your own curiousity dictate when he/she talks about it. (This is not directed at you peresonally.)

 

[lostrin]

Hi everyone, thanks for your responses. I have stayed away from the subject altogether and will only deal with my daughter's anguish when it comes up, great advice.

I did see Oprah, what a horror, but I watch it after she goes to bed. It was that show that made me realize what her sister might have gone through in her last life - my stomach was in KNOTS! I will never be so casual about egging info out of my kids again, since it may bring up horrible memories, or entice her to fabricate.
I will order Carol's book.

Thanks so much
lostrin