Mike Novakovic
Member
Multiple memories...
Since I was born I have had repeated 'memories' of different situations/events/people. I have tried to list them in chronological order (from what I can feel from the memories). All of these memories occurred between a few months old and up to approximately 7 years of age - but once they happened they stayed with me and didnt dissapear.
The earliest is one where I am sitting at the side of a grass clearing in the jungle with my family. All around the edges of the clearing are small family groups and each are making different things - It is very hot, and I look at my family of my son, his wife and their two small children with both pride and love. In the distance, there is a stepped pyramidal building. I slowly rise as I am very old and gently walk towards this building. I look back as I walk and smile at my family - they haven't really noticed that I am gone yet. I walk to the 'temple' and start the slow climb of the many steps to the top. When I reach the top I stop and look around at the panoramic scene of the jungle and the small groups of indian type people in the clearing happily working together down below. I walk inside and climb into a square alcove that has been hollowed out of the stone wall. These alcoves go all the way around the wall of this building and are used for people to die in. I know it's my time to go - I am happy and very very tired, but completely at peace.
I am in what seems to be a white 'hacienda' type of building. There is no glass in the windows only wooden shutters to close over at night. The walls are painted white inside as well as out. I am making something, but i'm not sure what. I am a young boy of possibly 6 - 7 years and I can see all of the other children wearing white clothing as I am. Outside the temperature is very very hot and the sky is a deep blue - it is a coastal village and I can see the waves crashing onto the rocks close to my home. I feel that Mexico is probably the location, but I cannot remember any other details other than I felt happy there.
I am being carried aloft on a wooden stretcher type device by a group of people down a sloping narrow cobble-stone street. The people are crying and upset. They stop and I am slowly placed into an alcove in the wall of this street - again, there are rows of these alcoves where the dead are interned but I am not dead! I try to tell them but it's as if they cannot hear me. I am screaming as they brick me up alive in this narrow alcove in the wall. Again, I have a mexican or south american feeling about the location.
I am a small child - and I feel a red indian child. I am with my father and we are being chased by a group of men - white men - It is winter and we are running through a forest and down a hillside in and out of the trees through mud and snow. There is a small stream running down this hillside through the forest and as we try to run across it a shot rings out and my father falls, there is a lot of blood on the snow, he lays very still - not moving at all, and I am very frightened.
I am being chased by a group of people shouting and screaming that I know have murderous intent and come to a large quarry about 200 feet deep. I am cornered with nowhere to run. I have no other choice but to kill myself and jump off into mid-air over the cliff as they reach me... I have a feeling I am a young teenage female possibly 14 or 15 years of age.
One memory I have is that of a very dark gothic type large mansion type house or castle very old and very intimidating - it was night-time and very wet and stormy and I was trying to find a way inside and couldn't. I was exhausted and crying to be let in.
I have a feeling it was either the family home or somewhere where I was employed. I have a feeling that it could have been Austrian or east german. I have always been very drawn to visit Austria, but also feel that I was a member of some wealthy family but that I had been cast out of the house in disgrace for some reason.
The next few memories seem to be all of the same person and I feel a young man in his early 20's and are all linked.
I see myself swimming in the sea after jumping from my boat (a small teak wood cabin-cruiser), while swimming, I am looking at a number of sea front buildings just beyond the beach and I have a feeling it is somewhere on the Cuban coastline. I am looking at a nightclub frontage specifically with palm trees outside. I feel that I am on leave or off duty from some military position and I am swimming with my girl and having fun. I am looking forward to visiting the nightclub later that evening and can visualise the music, drinking and enjoyment of the nightclub. I feel its in the late 1930's or early 1940's.
I see myself standing next to a large american car - very expensive, with lots of chrome and red leather interior with running boards along the side (its a convertable), and also that I am wearing the sort of light-brown coloured uniform of an american serviceman, with brown shoes and a brown belt. I know I am wearing a tie that is tucked into my shirt half-way up and I feel that I have a peaked hat on too. I am with my girl - a beautiful red head who I am very much in love with. Again, I strongly feel that the era was the late 1930's or early 1940's.
Associated too is another memory of my lying on a bed or table in a room (possibly a hospital or a dentists surgery) waiting for someone to come in to see me - it is mid afternoon, very hot and humid and a wooden ceiling fan is slowly turning overhead. There are wooden venetian blinds on the windows, and through them I can see large buildings such as those in chicago or New York and I am conscious of the sounds of cars and people outside - with the occasional horn sounding. Again, the 1930's or 1940's time scales seems to be the feeling I get.
I am in a fighter plane/bomber and diving towards a large battleship in the ocean below. The sea is a deep turquoise colour but there is lots of flack exploding around my cockpit and red hot bullets coming up to meet me from this ship. My plane is in a near verticle dive and heading down faster and faster while I am firing the cannon machine guns at the ship.
I have just escaped from what feels like a large factory or camp where I have been made to work - I feel very ill and weak and can barely stand. it is snowing and I slide down an embankment by a canal and hide cowering underneath a bridge. I am shivering with both fear and cold and coughing repeatedly. I am dressed in rags with bare feet and can barely stand I am so weak. All of a sudden, I am confronted by soldiers with snarling, barking dogs (german shepherds) who have been searching for me. I am pushed roughly to the ground and a loud shot rings out - the sound reverberates both through my head and off the walls of the underside of the bridge as I fall - they have shot me in the head... I feel no pain, only relief its over. I feel that this is probably in eastern europe and possibly around the mid 1940's.
As a footnote.. I strongly remember the feeling of wearing a leather and sheepskin flying jacket along with itchy grey trousers and for some reason I feel I was at sometime based somewhere in the county of Norfolk in the U.K and have fleeting memories of visiting a rural public house with colleagues. I also used to have repeated memories of an eagle emblem and the name 'Eagle Squadron' seems to really have some resonance with me.
Since I was born I have had repeated 'memories' of different situations/events/people. I have tried to list them in chronological order (from what I can feel from the memories). All of these memories occurred between a few months old and up to approximately 7 years of age - but once they happened they stayed with me and didnt dissapear.
The earliest is one where I am sitting at the side of a grass clearing in the jungle with my family. All around the edges of the clearing are small family groups and each are making different things - It is very hot, and I look at my family of my son, his wife and their two small children with both pride and love. In the distance, there is a stepped pyramidal building. I slowly rise as I am very old and gently walk towards this building. I look back as I walk and smile at my family - they haven't really noticed that I am gone yet. I walk to the 'temple' and start the slow climb of the many steps to the top. When I reach the top I stop and look around at the panoramic scene of the jungle and the small groups of indian type people in the clearing happily working together down below. I walk inside and climb into a square alcove that has been hollowed out of the stone wall. These alcoves go all the way around the wall of this building and are used for people to die in. I know it's my time to go - I am happy and very very tired, but completely at peace.
I am in what seems to be a white 'hacienda' type of building. There is no glass in the windows only wooden shutters to close over at night. The walls are painted white inside as well as out. I am making something, but i'm not sure what. I am a young boy of possibly 6 - 7 years and I can see all of the other children wearing white clothing as I am. Outside the temperature is very very hot and the sky is a deep blue - it is a coastal village and I can see the waves crashing onto the rocks close to my home. I feel that Mexico is probably the location, but I cannot remember any other details other than I felt happy there.
I am being carried aloft on a wooden stretcher type device by a group of people down a sloping narrow cobble-stone street. The people are crying and upset. They stop and I am slowly placed into an alcove in the wall of this street - again, there are rows of these alcoves where the dead are interned but I am not dead! I try to tell them but it's as if they cannot hear me. I am screaming as they brick me up alive in this narrow alcove in the wall. Again, I have a mexican or south american feeling about the location.
I am a small child - and I feel a red indian child. I am with my father and we are being chased by a group of men - white men - It is winter and we are running through a forest and down a hillside in and out of the trees through mud and snow. There is a small stream running down this hillside through the forest and as we try to run across it a shot rings out and my father falls, there is a lot of blood on the snow, he lays very still - not moving at all, and I am very frightened.
I am being chased by a group of people shouting and screaming that I know have murderous intent and come to a large quarry about 200 feet deep. I am cornered with nowhere to run. I have no other choice but to kill myself and jump off into mid-air over the cliff as they reach me... I have a feeling I am a young teenage female possibly 14 or 15 years of age.
One memory I have is that of a very dark gothic type large mansion type house or castle very old and very intimidating - it was night-time and very wet and stormy and I was trying to find a way inside and couldn't. I was exhausted and crying to be let in.
I have a feeling it was either the family home or somewhere where I was employed. I have a feeling that it could have been Austrian or east german. I have always been very drawn to visit Austria, but also feel that I was a member of some wealthy family but that I had been cast out of the house in disgrace for some reason.
The next few memories seem to be all of the same person and I feel a young man in his early 20's and are all linked.
I see myself swimming in the sea after jumping from my boat (a small teak wood cabin-cruiser), while swimming, I am looking at a number of sea front buildings just beyond the beach and I have a feeling it is somewhere on the Cuban coastline. I am looking at a nightclub frontage specifically with palm trees outside. I feel that I am on leave or off duty from some military position and I am swimming with my girl and having fun. I am looking forward to visiting the nightclub later that evening and can visualise the music, drinking and enjoyment of the nightclub. I feel its in the late 1930's or early 1940's.
I see myself standing next to a large american car - very expensive, with lots of chrome and red leather interior with running boards along the side (its a convertable), and also that I am wearing the sort of light-brown coloured uniform of an american serviceman, with brown shoes and a brown belt. I know I am wearing a tie that is tucked into my shirt half-way up and I feel that I have a peaked hat on too. I am with my girl - a beautiful red head who I am very much in love with. Again, I strongly feel that the era was the late 1930's or early 1940's.
Associated too is another memory of my lying on a bed or table in a room (possibly a hospital or a dentists surgery) waiting for someone to come in to see me - it is mid afternoon, very hot and humid and a wooden ceiling fan is slowly turning overhead. There are wooden venetian blinds on the windows, and through them I can see large buildings such as those in chicago or New York and I am conscious of the sounds of cars and people outside - with the occasional horn sounding. Again, the 1930's or 1940's time scales seems to be the feeling I get.
I am in a fighter plane/bomber and diving towards a large battleship in the ocean below. The sea is a deep turquoise colour but there is lots of flack exploding around my cockpit and red hot bullets coming up to meet me from this ship. My plane is in a near verticle dive and heading down faster and faster while I am firing the cannon machine guns at the ship.
I have just escaped from what feels like a large factory or camp where I have been made to work - I feel very ill and weak and can barely stand. it is snowing and I slide down an embankment by a canal and hide cowering underneath a bridge. I am shivering with both fear and cold and coughing repeatedly. I am dressed in rags with bare feet and can barely stand I am so weak. All of a sudden, I am confronted by soldiers with snarling, barking dogs (german shepherds) who have been searching for me. I am pushed roughly to the ground and a loud shot rings out - the sound reverberates both through my head and off the walls of the underside of the bridge as I fall - they have shot me in the head... I feel no pain, only relief its over. I feel that this is probably in eastern europe and possibly around the mid 1940's.
As a footnote.. I strongly remember the feeling of wearing a leather and sheepskin flying jacket along with itchy grey trousers and for some reason I feel I was at sometime based somewhere in the county of Norfolk in the U.K and have fleeting memories of visiting a rural public house with colleagues. I also used to have repeated memories of an eagle emblem and the name 'Eagle Squadron' seems to really have some resonance with me.
