Karmastrophic
New Member
Hello all, I recently found and joined this community and am still in the stages of discovering myself, my past life memories, and trying to decide whether those memories are real or not. In addition, I have long wondered about the possibility of my being a developing empath/sensitive with claircognizent abilities or whether I'm just being silly. Honestly, if someone started telling me the kind of things I find myself thinking, I'd probably consider them bonkers.
First, the psychic abilities and why I think I might possess them. I seem to sense things that I really can't find a tangible reason for. More than once, I have suddenly been overcome by intense sadness I can't explain, only to discover later that this wave of emotion coincided with a death - either of someone I knew or the death of someone close to someone I know. Other times, I seem to just 'know' information I have no reason to be aware of. One striking example is related to an event from my childhood. I was 5 years old and accidentally left behind at a public lake access where we had all gone swimming. I had ridden in a truck-bed camper and didn't see nor pay attention to the route we'd taken to get to the access, and I had never been there before...yet, somehow, I managed to successfully navigate the five mile route back to our campground at a different lake. Somehow, I just seemed to know where to turn, what roads to take, and never got off track.
As for what I believe are memories of a past life, they are fairly detailed, but I won't feel comfortable believing in their truth unless and until I can find some verification. I believe I died sometime around 1918, just shy of my 17th birthday. I had been left by my family at some sort of convent or 'poor house' type of place because I believe I was pregnant. I feel I was a smaller girl, petite with long, dark hair. I was murdered, and I feel it was at the hands of a male just because of the sense that the person was larger and stronger than I was. I also feel I must have known him, as I keep coming back to the thought of betrayal, which indicates to me it was someone I knew and trusted.
I was pushed roughly from either a window or balcony and fell to my death. I can actually vividly remember the sensation of the push - the feeling of large, strong hands on my back in the area of my shoulder blades. The shove was quick and forceful, and powerful enough to cause my head to snap backward as my body was propelled forward. I also feel that death was not immediate, that I lived for several moments after hitting the ground because I can also vividly remember the feeling of 'drowning in my own blood', feeling it gurgling in my throat, wanting to vomit as it filled my mouth and nose. And the sense of people being nearby, but knowing no one was coming to help me. If this is all true, then it makes sense why I am terrified of heights and can't even look over a second-floor railing without feeling panicked. I also have never liked having anyone behind me, it just makes me incredibly anxious...especially if it's a male behind me. And I can't sit in a room unless my back is protected, I need to be able to see all the entrances and sit in such a way that no one can approach me from behind.
I feel some attraction to the name 'Eva', or 'Ava', but I don't know that this was my name or what it means to me. It's funny, too - I've long suffered from depression, horrible loneliness, and a weird sense of longing. Now that I've started having these possible past-life memories, I feel that those negative emotions stem from THAT life and not this one, and I honestly am happier and more at peace than I've ever been. It's like I can now put those feelings aside and move on. I'd love to find some sort of verification of anything I've shared - just to know if there's anything to it or whether I just need some kind of medication, lol. But, if I *do* have some special abilities like this, I REALLY want to learn to use them, to strengthen them, and use them to be a sort of "para-medic"...to help heal, comfort, and release souls who might be trapped here on Earth.
First, the psychic abilities and why I think I might possess them. I seem to sense things that I really can't find a tangible reason for. More than once, I have suddenly been overcome by intense sadness I can't explain, only to discover later that this wave of emotion coincided with a death - either of someone I knew or the death of someone close to someone I know. Other times, I seem to just 'know' information I have no reason to be aware of. One striking example is related to an event from my childhood. I was 5 years old and accidentally left behind at a public lake access where we had all gone swimming. I had ridden in a truck-bed camper and didn't see nor pay attention to the route we'd taken to get to the access, and I had never been there before...yet, somehow, I managed to successfully navigate the five mile route back to our campground at a different lake. Somehow, I just seemed to know where to turn, what roads to take, and never got off track.
As for what I believe are memories of a past life, they are fairly detailed, but I won't feel comfortable believing in their truth unless and until I can find some verification. I believe I died sometime around 1918, just shy of my 17th birthday. I had been left by my family at some sort of convent or 'poor house' type of place because I believe I was pregnant. I feel I was a smaller girl, petite with long, dark hair. I was murdered, and I feel it was at the hands of a male just because of the sense that the person was larger and stronger than I was. I also feel I must have known him, as I keep coming back to the thought of betrayal, which indicates to me it was someone I knew and trusted.
I was pushed roughly from either a window or balcony and fell to my death. I can actually vividly remember the sensation of the push - the feeling of large, strong hands on my back in the area of my shoulder blades. The shove was quick and forceful, and powerful enough to cause my head to snap backward as my body was propelled forward. I also feel that death was not immediate, that I lived for several moments after hitting the ground because I can also vividly remember the feeling of 'drowning in my own blood', feeling it gurgling in my throat, wanting to vomit as it filled my mouth and nose. And the sense of people being nearby, but knowing no one was coming to help me. If this is all true, then it makes sense why I am terrified of heights and can't even look over a second-floor railing without feeling panicked. I also have never liked having anyone behind me, it just makes me incredibly anxious...especially if it's a male behind me. And I can't sit in a room unless my back is protected, I need to be able to see all the entrances and sit in such a way that no one can approach me from behind.
I feel some attraction to the name 'Eva', or 'Ava', but I don't know that this was my name or what it means to me. It's funny, too - I've long suffered from depression, horrible loneliness, and a weird sense of longing. Now that I've started having these possible past-life memories, I feel that those negative emotions stem from THAT life and not this one, and I honestly am happier and more at peace than I've ever been. It's like I can now put those feelings aside and move on. I'd love to find some sort of verification of anything I've shared - just to know if there's anything to it or whether I just need some kind of medication, lol. But, if I *do* have some special abilities like this, I REALLY want to learn to use them, to strengthen them, and use them to be a sort of "para-medic"...to help heal, comfort, and release souls who might be trapped here on Earth.
