Not sure what to think

[laura919]

The other day my 2-and-a-half-year-old got a photo album of her birth. She pointed at a picture from minutes after she came into the world and said, "That's when I got my new parents."
Later that evening I asked her if she remembers telling me about getting her new parents. She said yes. I asked if she had old parents. She said yes. I asked what they were like. She said they were,
"Different. Like me! And I was ME!" She has an amazing imagination, so I don't want to read too much into this. I decided to just wait and see if she says anything else.
Well, as of today, this is getting a little scary. We pulled the photo album back out. When we got to the birth pictures, she was asking me who everyone was. I told her that was a nurse, and a doctor and so on. She got agitated then, and said, "Mommy, I don't want to have fun. I want to stay here, with you!" When I asked what she meant by having fun, she didn't answer. She just got this cute worried look on her face and kept saying, "I don't want to have fun." Then, a little later, she said, "No doctors." She also said, "I don't want to have fun with the nurse." Maybe it's just doctor and nurse memories from checkups. Maybe she's just telling me not to take her to any doctors. But it was kind of strange. Looking at other baby pictures, I was saying, "That's you as a baby." She says, "I can be a little baby again later." Later for her can mean anything from tomorrow to never. She uses that word a lot. When ever she can't have something at the store, she says, "I can have that candy later," or something like that. It's still unnerving, though. I don't want to think about her incarnating again, and I want her to "stay here" for a really long time. You know? I'm frightening myself, so I think I should leave the subject alone for a while and not try to prompt her to talk about it in any way.
I certainly hope choosing an incarnation with me as a parent doesn't translate into not wanting to have fun. Not very flattering, is it?

 

[Ailish]

Hi Laura,

Welcome to the forum.

I don't want to think about her incarnating again, and I want her to "stay here" for a really long time. You know? I'm frightening myself, so I think I should leave the subject alone for a while and not try to prompt her to talk about it in any way.

I don't think there's anything to be frightened of. I spoke of past lives when I was small like your daughter -- and I am perfectly happy, healthy and well-adjusted now.

Children your daughter's age often speak of their past lives -- if a parent isn't listening, or doesn't know what to look for, it can often be "passed over" as playing.

You said she has an active imagination, so it's possible she isn't speaking of a past life at all.

You may want to read the following threads:

The Four Signs of Children's Past Life Memory

How can you tell the difference between a child's fantasy and a true past life?

How do I talk with my child when she talks about her Past Life?

I'd also highly recommend reading Carol Bowman's book Children's Past Lives, the first chapter you can read online here.

Another great thing you could do -- is to keep a journal and document the things she says and does. My grandma did that for me -- and I found it to be an extremely valuable resource.

Best of luck with your daughter -- and don't hesitate to ask questions.

Ailish

 

[tiltjlp]

Welcome to the forum Laura. Ailish has given you some wonderful links and advice. The only thing I would add is that even if you don't prompt her for information, don't shy away from asking her questions if she brings something else up. And you should start a journal, and write everything down. That way you can possibly piece together the story she has started telling you, or determine that it really is just her imagination.

John

 

[vicky]

Hi Laura,

Hugs to you. I was in your same shoes just over a year ago. I thought about discouraging my son from saying anything else but like you, it was because I was frightened. I also had to get over the hurdle of not believing in reincarnation when he started talking. Soon, there was no denying it.

You should applaud yourself for accepting a past life as a possibility and for listening to her.

For what it is worth, it is worth listening to and not squelching. There can be some healing in it for the children. It is kind of a hard road or it was for me. One thing that I sturggled with was being so caught off guard when he would talk about his past life.

I developed a few things to say that helped when i didn't know what to say.

1. Oh?,,,Then what happened?
2. Wow! That sounds ____________! What else happened?
3. Do you want to tell me more?
4. What do you think that meant or why did that happen? My son was 5, might not work with a 2 year old.
5. Sometimes, out of curiousity, I would ask him if mommy or daddy were there. That also helps distinguish between a memory from this life or another one.
6. Sometimes, my son would seem to possess knowledge of things he couldn't possibly have learned in this life - like all of the words to Old Man River. I often will ask him where he learned something or how he knows something. Sometimes, he gives a very plausible current life explanation and sometimes he says 'I just know.' That usually means it is past life related.

At 2 1/2, you already know what she knows, what she is exposed to. So, it will be easier to tell when she is talking about something she has not experienced in this life.

Good luck to you and feel free to pm me.

I definitely suggest reading Carol's book. It was a turning point for me. It will make you feel that what is happening is normal and it is.

Vicky

 

[laura919]

Thanks

I'm not upset that she might speak of a past life. I think it's very interesting and don't mind the concept at all. It's just that, in practice, I guess it frightens me that she could come up with some things that are difficult to handle. I'll just try to remind myself that there is no sense in worrying about something that might not happen or might be any problem at all. That's something I need to work on in general.

Thanks, again,

Laura

 

[vicky]

LOL, every mom needs to work on that. :laugh:

It still is kind of difficult to respond to. Its not like there is a parenting book out there that goes over this kind of thing. Not really many other moms that have been through it that can tell you how they handled it. Although, I'll bet there are many that have heard similar things to what you've heard and didn't recognize it as past life related.

When my son was 2 1/2, I was holding him and sitting on the couch. He said 'I used to hold you and Daddy like this. I was your daddy. Then he said, 'but it wasn't this house, there was snow there.' We don't get snow where we live but he had just been to the snow for the first time so I dismissed the whole statement because I thought he just wanted to talk about the snow. He didn't say anything else for another 3 years and I didn't think about that statement for three years. I didn't really believe in reincarnation, so it is not the first explanation that leaps to mind when your kids says something like that.

However, after he started talking in more detail about his past life, it really explained a lot about his behaviors and personality traits. I am really glad that I was able to stay open to hearing more and that I can see the connection. It helps me understand him on a much deeper level. It also absolves a lot of my guilt feelings when I see some of his present life behaviors have past life roots. And just remembering the past lives have taken care of a lot of those behaviors.

Vicky