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PL trauma causing fear now?

C

CoffeeCat

New Member
I'm still fairly new here and have tons and tons of questions haha! I feel like I'm asking too many questions. Questions that maybe only time will tell? So sorry for the plethora of Q's from me. I'm still trying to figure out a bunch of things.
I know traumatic situations stick no matter what really, but I kind of want to bring up the subject of physical abuse that is carried with us through lives???

Last year something happened that completely triggered a huge fear of men in general. It literally festered into this monumental delusion that every guy is out there to hurt me. I remember I started having vivid rape dreams? Graphic and not okay at all. Usually ended with my death.
I've started having dreams like that again only my current bf is my enemy? He's an incredibly sweet guy and he is literally like the male version of me. He was the first guy I wasn't completely terrified of. And I think that means something.
I made the mistake of telling him about a dream I had last night and he asked directly if I'd been raped before? Definitely made me shut down because I actually got really weird images in my head and I got really upset all of the sudden? I got all shaky and unsettled.
I said I hadn't because in THIS lifetime I haven't. But I feel like in past lifetimes I definitely have?

I know this is an icky subject to talk about but I feel like a crazy fool because vivid dreams are making me scared to have any type of contact with the bf?
Do any of you have tips on how to deal with this?
 
You can never ask too many questions! Please, ask away.


Definitely sounds like this fear is past life related. A lot of people see a past life hypnotherapist to find out the root of fears in this life by undergoing a regression. It may be tough, but a lot of people feel better after the regression and find that their current symptoms have abated. I would think it would be best for you to find a professional rather than go through this alone.


It also may be of some worth to seek out a therapist to talk to about these feelings as there may be some current psychological causes.


People also change roles in lifetimes and will reincarnate and meet again. It may be a possibility that your boyfriend is someone you knew from a previous life that you need to work out something with. I think ultimately seeing a professional hypnotherapist who specializes in past life regression would ultimately be the best move for you to sort out these fears and feeling.


Good luck to you and know that we support you any way we can.
 
I hope this doesn't sound silly but I am really starting to think that I have met my bf before. I remember talking to a friend about my bf and I randomly said to them, " I've been with him for years!" Surprising to me and my friend haha. Definitely didn't mean to say it but I did and we both laughed it off. But now that I think about it I'm kinda thinking.... maybe I've literally been with this guy before. Our lives have been weirdly parallel... like weirdly parallel. And we get along tremendously. Of course we have our spats and such but honestly, he's the best guy.


Anyway, maybe there is some unresolved things that I need to sort out with him that wasn't properly attended to in a previous life. Maybe on my part. Something that I need to do, and it will take time I feel.


I used to go to a therapist, but that was for self harm and depression. We actually got really close, 3 years and seeing her once or twice a week really bonds people haha. I've been thinking about seeing her again just to tell her that I've found a great guy. It's been about 14 months since I've seen her...


~~~ You are so kind and I feel so much less crazy and obnoxious on here!!! Thank you thank you. People here are so nice and understanding ugh so kind-hearted.
 
Hi CoffeeCat


Yes. This could definitely be a past life memory coming up. Sometimes if we meet someone we've known before (it happens a lot by the way) this will stir up those memories that might have lain dormant. It could be that this is why you've started having these dreams and fears around men. Did you start having the dreams and the related fears around the time you met him?


It's possible that your present life boyfriend may have not been so nice to you in the past as he is now. It happens. I'd be very cautious about discussing it with him though. People usually don't understand and it can frighten and upset them, especially something like this, that does not cast him in a good light. It's important to remember that you are both different people now, with new lives and new things to explore together and try not to let the past get in the way of that too much if you can. If he has done you wrong in the past, now is his chance to make it up to you, so that's got to be a good thing, right?


I agree with ZeonChar about doing some healing around this though. Professional regression is certainly recommended for very traumatic past life events. In the meantime, there are quite a few threads on the forum about healing past life traumas that you might like to take a look at. This is a good one: Can the soul heal from a past life trauma
 
I have friend that I know and feel has past life trauma.


It's hard when you suffer from it I still do.


I don't like cops still it's explained in my last life.
 
tanguerra said:
Hi CoffeeCat
It's possible that your present life boyfriend may have not been so nice to you in the past as he is now. It happens.
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I was thinking about that actually.... wondering if he wasn't the nicest guy in his past.... and now he's being a great guy... Which is fine! I like him just the way he is right now haha.


The fears started a few years ago when I was approached by a stranger(male)and asked really not appropriate random questions. Then last year this event happened with a real creep and that's when the dreams really started.


Then 6 months ago I met my bf.


-Actually I feel like everything good has been happening since my grandfather has passed? Like my life has been good. I've met very kind people since and I feel like I have had good luck with my livestock, job opportunities and of course meeting by boyfriend. Wonder if my grandpa is maybe giving me a little push in the right direction.


Thank you for the link!!!
 
As much as I loved Grampa I think I've only had one dream about him since his passing? It was blurry and just a split second, but he was hugging me and the whole family was at our house and he was healthy again and everything was normal. In my dream I didn't even remember that he had passed.


Guh he was so sick the months leading up to his passing....


Maybe that's the way he wants me to think of it. He wants me to see him as a happy healthy guy who is still in many ways a part of the family? I don't know haha...
 
Yes. Probably. It's not unusual to have dreams like this about loved ones who have died. I like to think it's them letting us know they're OK and not to be sad.
 
CoffeeCat said:
Last year something happened that completely triggered a huge fear of men in general. It literally festered into this monumental delusion that every guy is out there to hurt me. I remember I started having vivid rape dreams? Graphic and not okay at all. Usually ended with my death.


I've started having dreams like that again only my current bf is my enemy? He's an incredibly sweet guy and he is literally like the male version of me. He was the first guy I wasn't completely terrified of. And I think that means something.


I made the mistake of telling him about a dream I had last night and he asked directly if I'd been raped before? Definitely made me shut down because I actually got really weird images in my head and I got really upset all of the sudden? I got all shaky and unsettled.


I said I hadn't because in THIS lifetime I haven't. But I feel like in past lifetimes I definitely have?


I know this is an icky subject to talk about but I feel like a crazy fool because vivid dreams are making me scared to have any type of contact with the bf?


Do any of you have tips on how to deal with this?
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One point here that comes to mind straight off is that its virtually certain that you will have been raped (at least once) in some lifetime or lifetimes or other. The reason for that is that the statistics for the number of women who have been raped just in this lifetime are pretty horrifying. I have a vague recollection of it being about one-third of womenOMG that have been raped in this lifetime - and that's just the ones who admit it has happened to them.


Why did I take an interest in that? You don't have to guess for long on that one...because I'm one of them personally (but am not down on any official statistics about it).


I'd hazard a guess that I wouldn't be that surprised if around half of women of my own generation (ie Baby Boomer) and younger have been raped just in this lifetime.


So - over the course of a variety of lifetimes, I would say a woman (or anyone who has ever been a woman) has virtually zilch chance of NOT having been raped.


Yes...it is indeed a shocking fact I know. I guess my point here is the "Sh*t Happens" one of this is the sort of awful thing that happens (to an awful lot of us) from living on Planet Earth (aka "The Hell Planet", as I've heard it called before now....and I understand why....).
 
I absolutely understand what you're going through. (((hugs)))


One of the lives I recalled in a PL meditation I was able to verify and it turns out I was a little boy that was killed in a car accident in the 1930's. My biggest fear is driving. I am 35 years old and have never had a driver's license, nor do I drive. Regarding the assault, I highly recommend this book, it deals with the trapped energy of trauma regardless of the cause (I assume this would include past life trauma, I'm only 1/2 way through it myself but really finding it helpful).


http://smile.amazon.com/Waking-Tiger-Healing-Peter-Levine/dp/155643233X/ref=sr_1_1?s=books&ie=UTF8&qid=1410640909&sr=1-1&keywords=waking+the+tiger
 
TMarie33 said:
My biggest fear is driving. I am 35 years old and have never had a driver's license, nor do I drive.
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That's amazing. That would not be a problem in a city like San Francisco or New York. But in a semi-rural area like the valley it can be a hindrance. But I guess fear of flying is very similar. And I'm sure that's all PL related, too.
 
argonne1918 said:
That's amazing. That would not be a problem in a city like San Francisco or New York. But in a semi-rural area like the valley it can be a hindrance. But I guess fear of flying is very similar. And I'm sure that's all PL related, too.
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Flying is just about one of my biggest fears. I remember I went to San Francisco when I was about 7 for a family reunion. The airplane ride was like an hour but it was completely terrifying. I definitely didn't understand what was going on and I felt like if I let go of the armrests the plane would crash. Not being on solid ground unsettles me.


Like I can't be on a boat either. Or swimming really. Gotta have my feet on the ground.


~ It's interesting you mentioned that!
 
CoffeeCat said:
Flying is just about one of my biggest fears. I remember I went to San Francisco when I was about 7 for a family reunion. The airplane ride was like an hour but it was completely terrifying. I definitely didn't understand what was going on and I felt like if I let go of the armrests the plane would crash. Not being on solid ground unsettles me.
Like I can't be on a boat either. Or swimming really. Gotta have my feet on the ground.


~ It's interesting you mentioned that!
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Well, we can probably guess how you died in at least two past lives.
 
argonne1918 said:
Well, we can probably guess how you died in at least two past lives.
Click to expand...
Yeah seriously.


I'm also terrified of thunder but I don't know if that has anything to do with a PL or not. I never used to be scared of it, just within the past 5 years or so.
 
CoffeeCat said:
Yeah seriously.
I'm also terrified of thunder but I don't know if that has anything to do with a PL or not. I never used to be scared of it, just within the past 5 years or so.
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Maybe it triggered memories of war?
 
That might be true as well!!!! I never thought about that haha.


The sound of thunder to me is the sound of the world ending.


Like I don't know how else to explain that. I know what thunder is and I know how it's created and all that but whenever someone asks me "WHY ARE YOU SCARED OF THUNDER? It's harmless!!! It's the lightning that's scary."


My reply is, " it sounds like the world ending." or " it sounds like a volcano is erupting, which means we will die soon and the world will end." Those are literally my answers as to why thunder is scary.


Like, lightning is cool. But thunder is awful.


Last time there was thunder I cried and had to sleep with my mom. And this was a few months ago and I'm 19.
 
CoffeeCat said:
My reply is, " it sounds like the world ending." or " it sounds like a volcano is erupting, which means we will die soon and the world will end." Those are literally my answers as to why thunder is scary.
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AHA! It sounds like you died in a volcanic eruption. OMG But which one?
 
haha I have no idea! Volcano eruptions is just the first thing that pops up in my head when I hear low rumbling noises. Same reason I'm scared of earthquakes, because I associate those with volcanoes and tsunamis haha.


I remember one time when I was like 9 I watched a show on the discovery channel about volcanic eruptions and I cried because I got really scared haha.
 
CoffeeCat said:
Same reason I'm scared of earthquakes, because I associate those with volcanoes and tsunamis haha.
I remember one time when I was like 9 I watched a show on the discovery channel about volcanic eruptions and I cried because I got really scared haha.
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There are usually a lot of earthquakes for weeks leading to the volcanic eruption. Mt. St. Helens in WA had a rash of earthquakes starting several months before it exploded. The geologists were predicting it was getting ready to blow. But few people at the time had any experience with a "gas" volcano. People were used to seeing the molten lava ooze from the Hawaii volcano. But gas volcanoes don't ooze, they explode like an atomic bomb.
 
It's interesting you brought up Mt. St Helens haha because my name is indeed Helen.


I know this isn't super topic related but I gotta get it off my chest-


So last night I had a dream about my deceased grandfather and for the past few days I've been wondering in the back of my head "I wonder how I'd react, or how my bf would react if a family member of his got sick..."


Then this morning I got a phone call from the bf and he was crying and said that his grandfather was dying and he had to fly back to his home state to say goodbye.


This totally crushed me more than it should have. First because he sounded so upset and scared I completely absorbed that. I swear I'm like a sponge. After I got off the phone I cried, gave myself a nose bleed while doing so and then puked and now I have a headache.


UGH. poor guy.... People come and go and it's a part of life but I am getting to the point in our relationship where I think I actually really care about him and I'm just upset right now. I want to make him okay but only time will do that.
 
Goodness CC! That's tough. You're right though - he will have to go through it and time is the best healer.


Be easy on yourself. You're no good to your bf if you go all to pieces. Hope you feel better soon. (hugs)
 
I talked to him on the phone a little bit ago and he said he's glad he's home with his family and that his grandfather is peaceful now, sleeping and will hopefully die in his sleep. I think it will be okay.


I bet his grandfather is proud that he has such a sweet grandson...


I remember telling the bf, "There are no mistakes, no coincidences. All events are blessings given to us to learn from." Then I went on saying what I felt was right and he was silent on the phone for a while and then started crying and said he was so happy he found me. All this raw emotion is making me feel ill haha.


I'm trying to be his rock right now. I'll be here for him when he gets back, I am a phone call away right now. That's all I can do at the moment but he has family and that's more than I could do so I'm happy he's home right now.


I told him I'd keep my phone on all night and keep it close to my head so I'd hear it if he called. Even if it's 3 in the morning, I'm picking up that phone and I will do what I can.


I just want things to be okay. I hate seeing him upset and I don't know how to NOT be a sponge to emotions either.


I'm trying to calm down a bit and I think I have but still...


Sorry I just had to type or say all this somewhere and my parents are tired of me talking about the bf haha. So thanks for reading and listening if you did, I'm a bit overwhelmed!!
 
I actually think I almost had a panic attack, which I haven't had in a few years???


But then I was like, wait this won't solve anything and it will just make me tired so I think I wiggled my way out of one and just avoided it!!


My heart is still literally thumping in my chest and has been all day I can feel it.
 
Stayed up most of last night chatting with the bf. He's so upset gosh.....


The grandfather is hanging on probably waiting for the whole family to get there even though he's not awake.


It's killing me right now and I can feel the anxiety in my chest and I can feel it in my hands.


The bf is gonna say goodbye to the grandfather for the last time real soon here.


I'm trying to calm down I just want to fix things so bad I just want him to be okay
 
Aw jeez the bf is texting me and I can't take this I feel so sick. I think I legit need to go lay down or I might pass out.
 
I'm thinking your reaction is connected to the fact you dreamt about it...the dream happened to help you prepare for it. Death is a natural part of life, as is birth. Try to think of it in a more detached way....he is preparing for the next big step in life and the life he had should be celebrated. Try talking with your bf about good memories, try to remain calm. The more calm you are the calmer he will be. WE here in the west have such an unnatural aversion to death, hence this type of reaction. Think of it not as an end, but a new beginning for him and a chance for you to reflect on the wonderful life he had and what a positive impact he made. <3
 
I think the grandfather will be taking his leave tonight.


My chest hurts so bad and I haven't gotten stress chest pains in such a long time.


Bf called me and was literally sobbing and I couldn't understand a bit of it and I just want to hide right now.
 
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