Triggers and shared validations

[deborah]

Ailish came to visit this month and after shopping in SF, doing art and visiting friends we finally did a meditation. We had put off doing a meditation until the last few days of her visit. Meditations take time to do; emotionally they can be very taxing. So taking two to three hours to do it wasn't easy. Visit time was precious.

Aili had mentioned she wanted to try holding hands during the meditation - like I had done with my son Daniel when he was only seven years old. I was interested in finding IF holding hands would allow us to have a deeper and more connected experience. Expecting something to happen usually only prohibits it from happening. But in this case - the connection by touch brought on a heightened experience!We listened to William Buhlman's CD "OM" - it is NOT a guided regression CD but made up of Tibetan Bells chimes and bowl music.

Immediately - I was in the light- violet and blue light; then I was running....there was the sensation I was chasing Aili! I was running after a small girl who I knew in the meditation to be Aili now. There were stone walls with rounded corners. Water was running run down the sides of the walls and moss was growing up from the bottom. The smell of moss was strong, and the little girl was very quick. It was a Monastery...I was a nun....I knew the child thought it was funny to run, and dang it anyway - I could not catch her.

Time shifted and I found us in the garden. Another nun was hanging clothes on a line to dry, it was early fall. I was picking vegetables from the garden and the little girl was being instructed to place a rabbit snare next to some leafy vegetable. It was made of metal, and had a small noose that lay on the ground. I was assuring her that the noose would not hurt the rabbit - but that we had to stop them from getting our food. The rabbit would be taken "elsewhere." Deep inside - I knew that if certain people found it first - it would be dinner. We spent the days doing many chores..at one point she and I were folding small handkerchiefs or napkins into a specific form. I was teaching her how to fold them.

Time shifted and we moved to a place of prayer. I was instructing her to learn the prayers in Latin and to hold her hands in a certain manner. She did not want to hold her hands that way and I had to keep reaching over and moving them back into position. She was maybe four years old.

The interesting thing with this meditation was the overlaying of similar situations from one life into another. The Light became stronger...time moved forward from the 1300's to the 1900's. I was in Italy; my niece Alessandra had run off...and I was going after her. She was upset and hiding from me. I had seen her run to the house and I followed suit. I heard small noises coming from the closet door in the hall. I opened it carefully. She was under the lowest shelf - her foot sticking out from behind the stored goods. I paid careful attention to how I felt about her in the meditation. Although I knew her to be my niece - there was this awareness that she was also my sister Nicoletta who died in a bombing in 1917. I called my sister Nica for short - pronounced Neeka. Which as Aili has posted before and is the case. I notice the jars with metal lids of jam, and jellies, boxes of baking soda with early advertising designs that really fascinated me in the meditation. I began trying to coax the child out of her hiding place -but she refused.

Suddenly time and place shifted - I was sitting in a train. Sudden and unexpected movements like this can be shocking. The train was waiting to leave the station when BAM another train pasted by us REAL FAST! Shocked the bajesus out of me in the meditation - and while I was on the train. I didn't hear it coming! My mind was elsewhere.

Time shifted again - it was like a fast forward on a movie - flashes and images of bombs - fire buildings burning....then tears. Someone reached over and placed a rosary in my hand. I was numb, my family was gone. They had all died in the bombing in town. Tears...more tears..silent tears. We were walking outside of the church - the bodies would be moved to the burial ground soon. I hear the steeple bells ringing...then suddenly a small plane flew overhead...people were scrambling running it was so loud and so low! I could see it, the fear was intense but then the reality that there was a small plane that flew over my house --- NOW in this life in real time tripled the experience.

It was so loud and so low and the timing of the experience and the plane! Extraordinary. Extraordinary because I never hear planes flying over my house or hear planes flying that low. It not only triggered the fear and sadness to a deeper level - it was happening then and now. The people at the church in 1917 soon realized it was an allies plane - there was nothing to fear.

continued................

 

[deborah]

I cried for the rest of the meditation, but tried not to disturb Aili's experience. The tears flooded down my cheeks - like a faucet. I could not turn them off. I was soon in my home with family and friends from distant places who were rallying their support for me. I was only seventeen years old. I could see photos of my mother, my father and my sister and brother that had been carefully placed on the fireplace mantle. The photo of my mother was a profile shot and in sepia tones. Red maroon candles were lit in the room which set off a deep red glow about the house. There was the smell of incense, I was numb; I could hear the others crying. I felt my blood pressure dropping, I felt I was under water....I passed out and collapsed on the floor. I could hear people scrambling around me and then...nothing. Everything went black........


Toward the end of the meditation (which had been almost an hour), I was at Alessandra's funeral - looking at the rosary placed in her hands as she laid in her casket. I was reminded of my families death, and how a woman had placed a rosary in my hands in 1917. Alessandra's hair was in long curls and placed carefully on each shoulder. The strange thing was that in the meditation I could feel her spirit with me - she was not "in" the casket, but in front of me. I could see her spirit. I didn't know what to do or say and I felt alone - there was no one to talk too. :'( It was very strange for me - to be aware that she was my sister who had died and come back as my niece. Even stranger -- she was there in spirit with me - even after death.


I look forward to Aili sharing her experience. !

 

[Ailish]

I recently came back from another visit to California to spend time with my mom, Deborah. As she mentioned, we left our meditating until the last couple of days. We had a few opportunities earlier – and had even planned on it, but it just didn’t feel like the right moment to either of us. Neither of us wanted to do a meditation if we weren’t in the right frame of mind, nor if we weren’t both into it.


Occasionally, we will do a remote partnered exploration – while she is in California, and I am in Canada. We have had some interesting revelations, cross-over experiences and validations. But it just isn’t the same – as physically being in the same space as the other person. The energy is magnified – the intensity of the whole experience escalates. It seems like whenever we are together – we have all of these amazingly profound experiences. It’s a really extraordinary feeling – to meditate with someone and compare notes after and realize – you were seeing the exact same thing from a different perspective. No matter how often it happens – the profundity of the experience never fails to awe me.


I have never meditated while physically touching another person – but Deborah’s meditation experience with Daniel, and the intensity and depth of our previous shared experiences, made me want to try something new – so I asked her to hold my hand during the meditation as she did with Daniel and see if that made any difference in the experience. Boy – did it ever. The flow of energy through my whole body – and out my toes was so powerful I was twitching. At times I was aware of the energy between Deborah and myself – it was pulsating between our palms. The intensity of inner light – was both beautiful and inspiring at the same time. I could feel my third eye area enfolding in energy – and it’s so difficult to explain, but the expansion of my heart chakra was so immense – I felt completely wide open – just this pure flow of universal energy, love and joy surrounded me.


It was interesting to me – to note that we both went into the meditation without a focus – we never discussed it, just decided to go for it while the house was quiet. Yet we both hit an altered state immediately – and we both went directly to the monastery.


Here are the notes from my journal:

The meditation started out with a vibrant blue Light and I was in fast. I went straight to the monastery. I saw myself as Elisha – running down the hallway with stone walls. I was giggling a little to myself as I ran. I noticed the blue tint on the floor from the colored windows and the uneven stones with water stains.
Then I was walking outside with my mother (the nun). I had my hand tucked into a small “pocket” at the side of her clothing. She was going about her work – with me hanging off her. Neither of us were talking.


I saw myself carrying small squares of folded fabric in my arms – out to the shed in the back. They were small - about the size of a washcloth, folded over.


I jumped to the dining area in the monastery – where the children were waiting to be fed after the adults had eaten. It was fairly close to when I first arrived there – I was scared, unsure of what I was supposed to do. I was standing – then squatting – with my back against the wall. It was really cold – and I felt hungry and tired.


Then I was briefly in the kitchen. Various nuns were working, but I paid little attention to them as I dashed out the back door, across the garden and over the “hedge” area to the men’s side. I was looking for Brother Aloysius.


I jumped to carrying a big tureen filled with some sort of watery broth. It was huge and heavy – my arms couldn’t even fit around it. As I was carrying it – it was sloshing over the sides onto my clothing and hands. I was carrying it out back to the wooden shed.


I was kneeling reciting prayers before the white statuette of Mary – but I was REALLY full of energy and not wanting to be praying. I kept moving my hands and rocking on my knees. I did not want to sit still. The floor was cold – and hard on my knees.


Then I went to Italy. I jumped back and forth quite a bit between Alessandra’s life and Nicoletta’s life. Small – fairly inconsequential flashes in Nica’s life that I'm not going to bother posting.


I went to the country house. I was with Lera – and I was upset with her, asking “Is it true?” I ran from her – and was hiding in a small space. I had one leg curled up to my chest – and one leg sticking out in front of me. My face was turned away – chin down to my chest.


I saw myself on the top of a hill as Alessandra – holding Lera’s hand, watching a sunset over the vineyard. As fast as that came – I went to Venice. I was bouncing down the street ahead of Lera giggling and telling her to hurry up!


I saw myself as Nicoletta in the kitchen laughing with my sister - just a simple silly moment as we were cooking. It felt light - joyful.

[/QUOTE]

 

[Ailish]

continued from previous post.........

This is when the plane Deborah mentioned in her post – flew over the house. I was consciously aware of it – but at the same time, the sound immediately triggered the last day. I was in the middle of the bombing, screaming for Papa. My dress and my hair were on fire. There was smoke – I was choking; I couldn’t breathe. I felt my body shaking during the meditation, it was such a visceral reaction - I had no control over it.


I went to the hospital – to Alessandra’s last days. I can feel myself – in and out of my body. I am weak, feverish. I can hear hospital noises in the background – people working, walking down the halls, talking. I am aware – my eyes are CLOSED. I can feel someone lifting my body up – wrapping me in a blanket. Someone is singing a song.


I saw my brother Gianni, helping me write the last letter I sent to Lera - asking her to come and see me. He was patiently helping me.


Then I am at my (Alessandra’s) funeral. I am standing – looking at myself in the casket. I’m not scared – but fascinated. I see the pretty white dress, the long ringlets over my shoulders. I see the way my hands are folded across my chest – the rosary neatly folded over the top of my small hand. I turn and notice people have small cards in their hands. I can hear people crying in the background. I turn back to the casket and I see my brother, Gianni, as he tucks my special cloth doll in beside me when he thinks no one is looking.

Another thing I should mention that I found really interesting - is Deborah's memory of the rabbit trap and the garden – and my previous memory of hiding a rabbit in my room – a wild one from the garden. I had not shared that memory yet – with anyone. Yet in her experience – she was telling Elisha the snare in the garden WOULD NOT harm the animals – as she knew Elisha was sensitive.


Here's a brief excerpt:

I am in the garden, helping the Sisters. My mother is working close by – I can see her. Every so often she will come over and check to see what I am doing. I am on my hands and knees in the dirt pulling weeds when I see it – a little fluffy brown rabbit. It’s just a baby. I know it must come from the burrow between the monastery and the abbey. I play there a lot and I know where they hide. The Sisters will be really mad if they see another rabbit in the garden.
I crawl quietly on my hands and knees toward it. It doesn’t hop away – but sits looking at me. I pick it up and softly coo at it. I feel a thrill of excitement. I look back to the Sisters – they are not watching me. Just then – my mother looks up at me and calls to me to ask where I am going. I tell her I have to go inside for a minute and she looks at me kind of funny – I feel my cheeks flush and rush away, worried she will know what I am up to. I take him back to my room and shut him in carefully....

Aili

 

[deborah]

Thank you for sharing your experience Ailish. I hope others enjoy reading it as much as I did.

 

[Karoliina]

Thank you both! It's always such a pleasure to read about your shared experiences. It makes even an outsider humble in a way.


Karoliina

 

[Ailish]

Another type of trigger...


Since we are sharing our experiences – I thought I’d share this one, which happened only last weekend. I was going to start a new thread – but it actually ties in nicely with the topic of triggers AND our experiences regarding the monastery life.


Last weekend, I found myself very ill with a chest infection and a dangerously high fever – and I ended up in the hospital. While I was there – I experienced myself going OBE and wandering down the hallways. I saw several people wandering around as well – but none of them acknowledged me in any way.


I stepped through a doorway – and straight into the monastery, where I experienced a very similar situation – but as Elisha. I had witnessed a similar scene in a previous meditation many years ago – but this experience had much more clarity. I knew I was ill – I was dying – and I had a horrible chest infection and a high fever. I could feel the heat emanating from my body – feel my chest rattle when I coughed – feel the struggle to bring each breath of air into my dying body.


As Elisha – I was cognizant of crying for my mother – feeling the utter despair at the separation from her and the need to have her near. The emotion – the tears – the crying – exacerbated the coughing, making it even more difficult to breathe.


As Ailish – the only person I wanted with me was Deborah. Although she is hundreds of miles away – she’s my mom now, and she knows and understands me better than anyone. She’s the only person I needed to talk to – even to just hear her voice. It was hard to be so sick and so far away. In both cases – mom found a way to come to me - and her very presence calmed me considerably.


I experienced the Abbess “letting my blood” – trying to rid my body of the illness. I believe she knew it was a lost cause to attempt anything else – she knew I was going to die. She had previously separated me from my mother – feeling my mother’s focus was too much on me and not enough on her duty and commitment to God. She finally asked one of the sisters to “bring her mother.” I believe it was her way of easing her conscience – by allowing my mother to say goodbye to me – to be with me when I died.


Then my mother was there with me – holding me in her arms and saying prayers. She kissed my forehead. She started talking about everyday things as she took a cloth (like the ones that were folded) and wiped my face, neck and arms. She was begging me to live – to breathe. She was telling me everything would be okay.


I experienced a cross-over at this point between Elisha’s life – and my life now. There was a holographic projection over the nun’s face, and I knew her to be Deborah now. In both instances – each mom was saying the same things – to breathe – and it would be okay, I would be fine. She became Deborah completely – and the words the nun had spoken only moments before – were being spoken by her now. The blending of the words between then and now – both similar in context and in the situation - I found truly fascinating.


Aili


P.S. Thank you for your comments, K - but you are hardly an outsider!!! hug2.gif I'm glad you enjoyed reading our experiences - it was fun to share.

 

[Sunniva]

Thank you so much for sharing. It was a very fascinating read.

 

[ChrisR]

What an amazing experience that must have been, thanks for sharing Deborah and Ailish...:thumbsup:

I experienced a cross-over at this point between Elisha’s life – and my life now. There was a holographic projection over the nun’s face, and I knew her to be Deborah now. In both instances – each mom was saying the same things – to breathe – and it would be okay, I would be fine. She became Deborah completely – and the words the nun had spoken only moments before – were being spoken by her now. The blending of the words between then and now – both similar in context and in the situation - I found truly fascinating.

I was just curious, Deborah, how you saw any of this from your perspective? Did you experience any of this at the same time as Aili? Or do you remember visiting her in the hospital? Or were you, Aili, remembering the nuns' words, but remembering them as if Deborah were saying them to you now?


I hope that makes sense, I found it difficult to put this question down in words...

 

[deborah]

HI Chris,


My concern for Aili during her illness included her breathing, being supportive of her and keeping in touch beyond cyberspace. Although I did not experience it from her perspective - her experience of it is beautiful and very telling of our relationship now - and then. I do visit her OBE on occasion.


Aili is extremely intuitive as you well know and seems to work from the seventh and eight chakras. Her experience validates to some degree our past life connection together. Holographic projections during past life experiences are difficult to understand if you have not had the experience. They are fluid, in motion and show the multi-dimensional aspects of the soul. Let me explain:


They help me know the identity of individuals through a duality of images; one a past life memory of who they were, the other a holographic form of who they are now. In other words, during the meditations I remember and see the person in my past life. Then, projected over them is a holographic light, which takes another form - the form of who they are to me now. Both are fluid and in motion.


The best way I can explain this is to reference the holographic projections at Disneyland in the Haunted House. Imagine seeing a physical person and over their body is a holographic projection of light that fully describes another bodily form. This is how I sometimes see people who were in my past lives and what Aili is explaining in her post above. It confirms the souls identity for me, and I am able to see that the person then and now are one in the same.


It is as if - both are happening simultaneously. : angel


Take care of yourself Aili! We are sending you healing love and Light....MEGA doses!!!!!

 

[Ailish]

Hi Chris,


Deborah did a fantastic job of explaining with her analogy of the Disneyland projections. :thumbsup:


It's hard to explain. When I was little, I used to call them "faces" as I didn't know the proper term for what I was experiencing. It's interesting - because occasionally it will happen with someone I have not shared a past life with - for example, seeing a holographic projection over a friend, or the waitress at the restaurant - in waking consciousness.

Or were you, Aili, remembering the nuns' words, but remembering them as if Deborah were saying them to you now?

In this particular instance - my mother (the nun) was talking to me - it was her words I was hearing, as she had spoken them then. It was that memory in time I was re-experiencing as Elisha - triggered by a similar event. Holographically projected over her image - was Deborah.


At this point - my awareness shifted and I was experiencing as Ailish - Deborah was completely herself, not a holographic projection - and speaking the same words of comfort and caring - (obviously with a different cadence, phrasing etc.).


It's really difficult to explain the experience without losing something of it in written words - but it was very special to me


I hope that helps.....


Aili

 

[Ailish]

I have another experience to share that you might find interesting I occasionally remember words and phrases in another language during a meditation – but only once in Latin (which I have never studied in this life), and it was in relation to a completely different lifetime.


Last Thursday night I was waiting to see the doctor at the hospital – and as per usual – there was a ton of activity around me. My fever was high – I was feeling kind of half in and half out of my body. I could hear a man on the other side of the curtain next to me speaking with a woman. He was talking about God’s love – and how that is a person’s greatest comfort during sickness.


I instantly saw myself – as Elisha.

I am walking with my mother towards the farthest wooden shelter in the trees. She is carrying some thin blankets in her arms. I am walking beside her, my hand tucked into her “pocket.” She smiles at me and hands me one of the blankets, telling me that we can offer comfort to the sick by prayer. I follow her into the shelter – where people are scattered around on thin straw palettes. I hear people coughing – some are moaning or crying. My mother is going from person to person - covering them with blankets, whispering prayers over them. I am walking with her – still clutching a blanket in one hand, my other hand clinging to her pocket. She stops beside an elderly man – he looks ashen – his eyes are glassy. I feel afraid of him and lean into my mother. She puts a reassuring hand on top of my head - and tells me to cover him with the blanket I am holding. I stare at her for a moment – I am fearful of moving away from her and closer to this man. She says, “Said exem-plum essto fidel-ium in-ver-bo….” (there is more to it – but I could not write all the words down – as the memory continued) I keep my eyes on her –but take the blanket and try somewhat awkwardly to cover him. She motions for me to kneel with her next to the man. I watch her pick up the rosary from the palette and place it in his hands – he looks rather stunned. My mother keeps her hand on his for a moment, and then she begins to pray over him. I tuck my hand in her pocket again and lean against her. I am listening to the words she is saying – “am-bu-la-verro in-valley- um-bray mor-tiss.”

At this point I became fully aware that I was repeating those last words out loud as Ailish – in the hospital – in full view of the ER desk. That kind of ended it for a while. I scribbled what I could down – and made a note to ask a friend about the words. For some reason - the 22nd Psalm was in my head and I felt this was perhaps what it was.


My friend directed me to the 23rd Psalm. The actual translation is: “Nam et si ambulavero in Valle umbrae Mortis.” - or “For though I should walk in the midst of the shadow of death, I will fear no evils, for thou art with me.” Also known as “Yea though I walk through the valley of the shadow of death, I will fear no evil, for Thou art with me.”


I felt kind of weird about the numbers - and being wrong about the Psalm. I did a quick google search when I had a few minutes - and found a reference that stated that in Latin the 23rd Psalm was originally the 22nd. I'd like to research more about that - and love to hear if anyone knows anything about it.


A while later – they again stuck me with an IV for dehydration. I was thinking at this point that I really had to text Deborah - it had been hours and I knew she’d be anxious that I hadn’t contacted her yet. I felt her with me – I knew she was worrying. I closed my eyes – and tried to send her reassuring thoughts – and instantly was wrapped in a gold-blue light. I heard her voice – my mother’s voice speaking again in Latin – I felt her hands on my face, my cheeks. I am not seeing anything – but feeling the heaviness in my chest – each rasping breath. I hear her – she is crying. I can feel her tears on my own cheeks as they fall. She keeps repeating “par-vu-lous et nol-ee-tay e-ohs pro-hi-ber add me ve-nee-ray….” there was more to it – but those words stuck with me.


That was it for the hospital experiences – but then the other night I was lying in bed – again with a very high fever, and I was suddenly running down the hallway at the monastery:

I am running down the long hallway that leads around the building – the one with windows facing inside, but stone on the outside. My mother is chasing me – calling to me that I need to practice. I dart into a room and hide behind a chair, hoping she won’t see me. I see her feet – her long robes swishing in front of me and know I am caught. She tells me to come out and start reciting now. I scramble out from my hiding place and she takes my hands and places them on her string of beads that hang from the side of her corded belt. She is speaking words – I am echoing her, unhappily, “Li-berra no-sa- ma-lo.”

If anyone has any idea what any of those other words could be – please do not hesitate to offer a possible translation! I am only spelling them phonetically.


Aili

 

[Eevee]

I just asked my son (who is in his 5th year Greek-Latin) for a translation


Here goes :

parvulus et nolite eos prohibere ad me venire

parvulus et : small and/or....


nolite eos prohibere ad me venire : don't stop them from coming to me.


I think this refers to Jesus saying : Let the children come to me.

sed exemplum esto fidelium in verbo

'but be a truthful example by (your) words'

libera nos a malo

'free us from evil'


Thanks so much for sharing, Aili !

 

[Ailish]

Wow, Eevee! That is fantastic!!!! Thank you so much - and please thank your son for the translations!!


It makes sense somewhat in context of which I heard it, I think. I am always relieved when something I hear - makes sense....lololol Ohhhh....I am excited now!

I think this refers to Jesus saying : Let the children come to me.

Does anyone know the exact quote? Or where it could be found in the Bible? I may be able to google and find a literal translation of the verse in Latin if I know where it comes from. That would be *very* cool!


Thank you again!!!!


Aili

 

[Eevee]

Mark 10:13-16


I passed your thanks to Steven and he said he is glad he was able to help.


I join you in your exitement !!!


Eevee

 

[ChrisR]

Hi Aili,


When I read your post, and Eevee's reply, what came to my mind was the well known quote from the bible...

"Suffer little children, and forbid them not, to come unto me" Matthew 19:14

which, translated into Latin, looks like this...

"Sinite parvulos, et nolite eos prohibere ad me venire"

 

[Ailish]

AWESOME! Now I am REALLY excited! Thank you so much, Chris! That is exactly how Steven translated my mish mash of words, isn't it?!

“par-vu-lous et nol-ee-tay e-ohs pro-hi-ber add me ve-nee-ray….”
parvulus et nolite eos prohibere ad me venire


parvulus et nolite eos prohibere ad me venire

Eevee - your son is brilliant!!!!!


Now I want to try to find the other words............: angel

 

[Eevee]

The 'free us from evil' obviously is from The Lord's Prayer'...

 

[Eevee]

1 Timothy 4:12


http://www.fourmilab.ch/etexts/www/Vulgate/1_Timothy.html


for the phrase : sed exemplum esto fidelium in verbo





Eevee

 

[Ailish]

That's fantastic, Eevee! THANK YOU!!!! I just looked it up in English to see if it made sense in context in the memory:

4:12. Let no man despise thy youth: but be thou an example of the faithful, in word, in conversation, in charity, in faith, in chastity.

Sounds like a learning moment to me...lolol. : angel


Now I'll see if I can find the Lord's Prayer in Latin.

 

[Ailish]

I've recently had several memories of visiting inside of the "men's side" at the abbey. They were housed in a different building separated by a hedge (where my friends the rabbits lived) .


Technically females were not allowed inside of the male "dormitories," and vice versa, however brother Aloysius had taken me in to see my brother - who was dying. I was only five - not much of a threat to male safety. :laugh:


Their rooms were very similar to ours - just a small "cell," some with a tiny window and some without. Each one held a cot that passed as a bed and some woollen blankets on it. A night table that looked like a small box - that had a candle, and a statue of Mary. The woollen blankets were a darker color than on the women's side. I have no idea why.


Each side had a sort of “children’s ward.” Really just a large room shared by orphans (the sick were segregated from the healthy and kept in a wooden shelter outside). After the plague hit not too many children remained in the town – many died, some were shipped off to relatives or other convents and some were put to work. Children who were entering into the convent or who were placed there by their parents (usually girls) were treated well. Once the boy children were breached they were sent to the men’s side. I was not put in the children’s ward – I had my own room. My brother, however, was in the boys' ward - there were about 10 boys there in total.


I spent a lot of time in the garden, which was behind the kitchen and between there and men’s side. They also had a garden on the men’s side. Brother Aloysius also grew beautiful roses along the hedge.


Much time was spent in silence – which I enjoyed. I still find much comfort in silence and in just being.