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Past Life Relapse . . . .

:) I'm definitly feeling better the older I get and things - like pl memories - are coming along more quietly -- more like a download and knowing and less like a crazy ptsd flashback -- though still emotional and some things are still not entirely pleasent. :confused:
Seems like I spent my last years in california and having been at a diner frequently where there was a girl working whose nickname was Sundae o_O.
I was quite lonely these days. I've seen my apartment in a two story house painted pale blue. The most unpleasent incident was me entering a motel room where I was supposed to meet a guy and then there were two young fellows - one trying to attack me and I believe I shot them both -- and I felt terribly sorry.
The songs I believe I recall with emotional impact are mostly brit rock songs from the diner. What really got me was: semi detached suburban mr james (manfred mann), death of a clown and waterloo sunset (kinks), whiter shade of pale (procol harum). Never liked elvis much. It was the girl at the diner who was singing along and told me about the songs she enjoyed.
Sure I could be all wrong about this. I'm sceptical myself - but thats what I got. I want to know the truth whatever it may be.
 
Hi Sundayatdusk and all, yes I do.
As I said I can´t be absolutely sure but I saw me inside a red pickup truck driving curvy roads in a forest/mountain area (Sequoia NP reminds me of that but honestly I don´t know the location). Eventually I lost control (drunk? - I don´t know) and fell all over, falling out of the pickup I was smashed into the woods and couldn´t move, I assume I was dying there. This would make sense considering the uneasy feeling I have whenever I´m in a forest. Even as a very young child I wouldn´t want to stay there and always wanted to go right home. Really everybody else in my family enjoys being in the woods and my family does and did that frequently. I always wondered why I was feeling that bad between trees which was always said to be such a healthy relaxing environment for practically everyone. I just hated the thought of the insects there too. Lately I remembered my favorite toy car as a kid was a matchbox red pickup truck - I always used to make it jump over something and the whole game consisted of which car would go the longest distance without turning upside down. :confused:
It does make sense.
When I died I was in my 60ies so quite an old man o_O

BTW the song I mentioned carry tremendous emotions - I do like other songs too but they are not anything like that. I like No milk today, Rolling Stones songs and Beatles songs but these I´ve listened to a million times in this lifetime and they are without the extreme emo content :D

Rough lifetime - yeah to some extent.
I had a glorious one year of fame in between :rolleyes: but even that wasn´t easy going of course.
Afterwards I had a great family life in Ontario for some time.
There´s also lots of blank space :(
In this life I wrote a screen play and I´m pretty sure I wrote one back then too but like this time it didn´t work out. But it was fun to write it at least :D
 
SundayAtDuskReturns said:
:) How old are you, Thyme? I think the older you get, the less stronghold a past life has on you, although there obviously can be relapses.
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Twenty.

And yes, I support the idea that relapses diminish over the years.

When I was thirteen my nightmares were constant. The only time I had a major relapse at my present age was when I traveled to London.

I'm still very young, but I feel that my relapses are diminishing day by day.

It's hard to stop remembering things when at parties my friends play a specific song. I like rock, but sometimes listening to that kind of music reminds me of things from my past life. I listen to Dream pop to relax and forget everything I suffered. I needed to get the rock out of my system and find another kind of music! I keep listening to rock bands, but not as much as before, and I feel better.:)
 
glia21, No Milk Today by the Herman Hermits? This is the second time I've encountered someone online claiming to like the song! I've always liked it, but it's not one of their more famous hits, so am always surprised when someone mentions it. What's the screenplay about? Why do you see it as something that will never be worked out, or are you saying it was rejected by others, if I may ask?

Thyme, oh, you are young! The twenties can be a very difficult decade, but you also can learn a lot about yourself during that time period. I had to look up Dream Pop, because I never heard of it. Rock as in how heavy?
 
I haven't heard of dream pop either. That's probably because I'm not in my twenties anymore :cool:
No milk today - herman hermits - was and still is a lot on the radio, my parents favorite station played it often when I was a kid, so I cant state its pl related. Its a great song anyway :)

Sunday, the Screenplay is not much of a deal. I wrote it in the late 90ies early 00 and spent lots of nights on it... the setting is in Chicago and mid west countryside in the 1930ies. Its about a guy and his girlfriend being on the run, car breaks down - runs out of gas, getting stuck on a lonely farm and having to deal with a few crazy people including their partners in crime later on. Big fun to write it, its a little violent though. It might be a bit inspired by the 1994 tarantino movie pulp fiction, but its a straight story and the characters are worked out quite good. Still like what I wrote. Im usually not good in making things up, I just cant do it, i cant even tell good night stories to the kids and rather read a book to them. So im amazed about myself :cool:
It wasnt rejected.
I told a few people about it but never actually showed it to anyone. Due to the emo impact maybe. I had thought about including the issue of pre arranged bankrobberies that lays somewhat heavy on my mind too but found out nobody seemed to know what I was talking about and left it alone.

In my life I had a feeling there were 2 different roads to take, either the career path or the family path and it was on me to decide. For various reasons I decided to stay in Europe and have kids.
Regards
 
glia21, I immediately thought after reading your post that I wished you had written anything but a screenplay, because then I would have told you to send it off some place or enter it in a contest. Knowing nothing about screenplays, I researched a little just now, and there are some contests out there that seem legitimate and don't have totally outrageous fees. One that caught my eye was one that accepts scripts from those who reside outside of the USA, and also will provide a critique to you about the script by March--https://www.bluecatscreenplay.com/competition/rules-guidelines/. The final deadline is later this month, though, and the script has to be in English. There must be contests like that in Europe, too. Why not send it off to a contest? It might rekindle your interest in screenwriting. You can write and raise kids at the same time. I know, I know, easy to say!:p

Well, gee, No Milk Today, still has a listening audience somewhere. Even though I live in an area that has always had a huge number of radio stations, none, except one AM one, ever plays songs from the 60s any longer. (Not the Herman Hermits, though.) There aren't even any weekend oldies shows left. The song is on my iPod, however, so I can listen to it all I want.:)
 
:) oh thanks for the research! That´s so nice of you! It is written in english but now I´m no native speaker any more and get terribly frustrated sometimes. It´s like I oughta know, but one word or the other is just slightly out of reach. On the other hand, sometimes there is only the english phrase on my mind, and then I don´t have the german words ready. So the language is an issue. I won´t send it anywhere I´m afraid - but thank you!
 
SundayAtDuskReturns said:
Thyme, oh, you are young! The twenties can be a very difficult decade, but you also can learn a lot about yourself during that time period. I had to look up Dream Pop, because I never heard of it. Rock as in how heavy?
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Well, dream pop is not something new, it was very popular in 1990 and 1991. Popular music today isn't something I like very much, even though I'm twenty years old. People of my generation are more attracted to the genre trap.

About rock, I liked grunge and similar musical genres, but that music reminded me of bad moments in my past life, which made me have serious relapses. It's good music, but I needed to listen to another genre that could relax me and Dream pop was a great help.

I keep writing and composing rock songs, but when I feel happy.

Going back to the relapses, I feel better now than I did 5 years ago. I haven't had hopeless relapses or anything like that. I guess when I'm 50 I'm going to overcome a lot of things that keep bothering me. Or maybe not, who knows, it's different for everyone.:)
 
glia21 said:
:) oh thanks for the research! That´s so nice of you! It is written in english but now I´m no native speaker any more and get terribly frustrated sometimes. It´s like I oughta know, but one word or the other is just slightly out of reach. On the other hand, sometimes there is only the english phrase on my mind, and then I don´t have the german words ready. So the language is an issue. I won´t send it anywhere I´m afraid - but thank you!
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Your English is excellent in your posts. How did you learn English? Well, I'm sorry you won't consider sending off the screenplay. I thought it might be good for you to connect to your younger, creative self, and inspire you to write some more. :) But there's plenty of time for you to write in the future when the kids are older. There's lots of articles these days of writers who don't get published until their fifties or older. People often do get wiser as they age. Sometimes I go back and read things I wrote in my 20s and cringe! :eek:
 
Thyme said:
Well, dream pop is not something new, it was very popular in 1990 and 1991. Popular music today isn't something I like very much, even though I'm twenty years old. People of my generation are more attracted to the genre trap.

About rock, I liked grunge and similar musical genres, but that music reminded me of bad moments in my past life, which made me have serious relapses. It's good music, but I needed to listen to another genre that could relax me and Dream pop was a great help.

I keep writing and composing rock songs, but when I feel happy.

Going back to the relapses, I feel better now than I did 5 years ago. I haven't had hopeless relapses or anything like that. I guess when I'm 50 I'm going to overcome a lot of things that keep bothering me. Or maybe not, who knows, it's different for everyone.:)
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Thyme, my guess is you will overcome a lot of stuff long before you hit your fifties. Your thirties might be more like it.;)
 
SundayAtDuskReturns said:
Your English is excellent in your posts. How did you learn English? Well, I'm sorry you won't consider sending off the screenplay. I thought it might be good for you to connect to your younger, creative self, and inspire you t:Do write some more. :) But there's plenty of time for you to write in the future when the kids are older. There's lots of articles these days of writers who don't get published until their fifties or older. People often do get wiser as they age. Sometimes I go back and read things I wrote in my 20s and cringe! :eek:
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:D I still wait for the wisdom to come!
But thank you, well I had english at school from age 10 to 18, but no good grades unfortunaly. I travelled a lot in my life, have been to the US and Ireland several times. At an sci work camp in Kansas I got told I had a midwest accent which didnt surprise me that much but I still found it an interesting observation. I was 19 at that time. I feel very much drawn to Chicago, great place to be, have a feeling like "it has always been good to me". Difficult to explain. I feel deeply connected to my pl self. My pl self was very present when I was a teenager and in trouble, convincing me there were better times to come and to keep going. Not to quit school for gods sake - that was what I had done before. I realized my lack of education was one thing that got me off the tracks. I could have done better.
I also read a lot of american and british novels.
 
glia21 said:
:D I still wait for the wisdom to come!
But thank you, well I had english at school from age 10 to 18, but no good grades unfortunaly. I travelled a lot in my life, have been to the US and Ireland several times. At an sci work camp in Kansas I got told I had a midwest accent which didnt surprise me that much but I still found it an interesting observation. I was 19 at that time. I feel very much drawn to Chicago, great place to be, have a feeling like "it has always been good to me". Difficult to explain. I feel deeply connected to my pl self. My pl self was very present when I was a teenager and in trouble, convincing me there were better times to come and to keep going. Not to quit school for gods sake - that was what I had done before. I realized my lack of education was one thing that got me off the tracks. I could have done better.
I also read a lot of american and british novels.
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How interesting. :) So, are you Austrian or you just ended up there? Okay, did you believe in reincarnation when you were a teenager, or is that something you looked back on and realized your "pl self was very present" during your teen years?
 
SundayAtDuskReturns said:
How interesting. :) So, are you Austrian or you just ended up there? Okay, did you believe in reincarnation when you were a teenager, or is that something you looked back on and realized your "pl self was very present" during your teen years?
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I am Austrian this time, born and raised :) travelling was a big issue for my parents too, so in the summer time we went a lot on vacation to Italy and sometimes abroad (they were both teachers) - but when I travelled I spoke more german then english, most times I was accompanied by family .. not much chance to speak english at all.
Something that`s funny with me is how much certain words really touch my soul, and hit home. It´s quite ordinary words like "reckon" or "gay" (not meaning queer). It´s stupid how excited I get by simple words. Or poems. I´m not much into poems, not at all, but "the sick Rose" bei William Blake is something I have constantly on my mind. As if it was a poem that was very present in the past, like something you might find written on a fabric or something - I remember households of my grandparents friends - they often had sayings or short poems in the kitchen.

Talking about my present PL self I´m speaking about a voice in my head and an image on my mind. Nothing schizophrenic, I was well aware I was speaking to myself in a way. My 30 years old self. I was 12 to 13 at that time, I had seen a pic of my PL before, by accident, in a childrens book somebody gave to me about how to be a mini detective. And that is really hilarious. :D
So I was speaking to myself and at the same time I was not. I/he spoke english to me. It sounds very weird, I know, but there is no other way to describe it. I had vivid flashbacks to my childhood and my dad at that time.

Some memories still come flooding in time to time. Kind of relapse indeed - since that is the topic of your thread.
One of my latest memories is my kid sister asking me if I´d known Whitcomb Riley personally growing up in Indianapolis. It sounds crazy to me too. But I saw her, with the poem book in her arms, waiting for my answer, excited ... :confused:

Reincarnation is something I was always pretty sure of but I would never ever mention the "R" word to anyone in real life, let alone details of my PL! That`s why I´m so active here at this place and am grateful for the opportunity. :)
 
glia21 said:
I am Austrian this time, born and raised :) travelling was a big issue for my parents too, so in the summer time we went a lot on vacation to Italy and sometimes abroad (they were both teachers) - but when I travelled I spoke more german then english, most times I was accompanied by family .. not much chance to speak english at all.
Something that`s funny with me is how much certain words really touch my soul, and hit home. It´s quite ordinary words like "reckon" or "gay" (not meaning queer). It´s stupid how excited I get by simple words. Or poems. I´m not much into poems, not at all, but "the sick Rose" bei William Blake is something I have constantly on my mind. As if it was a poem that was very present in the past, like something you might find written on a fabric or something - I remember households of my grandparents friends - they often had sayings or short poems in the kitchen.

Talking about my present PL self I´m speaking about a voice in my head and an image on my mind. Nothing schizophrenic, I was well aware I was speaking to myself in a way. My 30 years old self. I was 12 to 13 at that time, I had seen a pic of my PL before, by accident, in a childrens book somebody gave to me about how to be a mini detective. And that is really hilarious. :D
So I was speaking to myself and at the same time I was not. I/he spoke english to me. It sounds very weird, I know, but there is no other way to describe it. I had vivid flashbacks to my childhood and my dad at that time.

Some memories still come flooding in time to time. Kind of relapse indeed - since that is the topic of your thread.
One of my latest memories is my kid sister asking me if I´d known Whitcomb Riley personally growing up in Indianapolis. It sounds crazy to me too. But I saw her, with the poem book in her arms, waiting for my answer, excited ... :confused:

Reincarnation is something I was always pretty sure of but I would never ever mention the "R" word to anyone in real life, let alone details of my PL! That`s why I´m so active here at this place and am grateful for the opportunity. :)
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I know what you mean. While I can speak about reincarnation with others in my off-line life, I never could in such detail as online.

You are definitely a word person and, thus, should be actively writing. You are also highly sensitive to other dimensions outside of the normal ones. You need to be writing Twilight Zone type stories! ;)
 
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