Blueprint of your emotions/eagerness before death

[glia21]

Hey,
I haven´t started a thread for a long time but lately I have been thinking about something. Is it possible that there is a strong link between the emotional status quo you have been in just at the point of your (unexpected) death and the information you carry along to the next lifetime? I hope I can make myself clear what I mean. See, I remember that accident (if it was one…) with that redish pick-up Ford f100 in 1967, either fall or winter time. I was singing and humming along all these new released songs on the radio and I was heading from California to the North. I had my ex wife and almost grown up son on my mind and all my thoughts were placed around them and possible scenarios of what might happen, how they would react towards my unexpected arrival. And also a lot of guilt and fear.
So I obviously died that day.
What did I bring along? As a kid, up to the age of 10:

- Endless car crashes with a red Ford matchbox car (D 1000) I let jump downwards
- lots of pictures painted of a boy with a certain hairstyle and face that never changed (unfortunately I´m not such a talented painter) and the name Jesse
- deep heart ache when watching someone playing baseball with a kid on TV
- longing to be called Dad
- fear of being in a car and having an accident (I never had one in my entire life)
- uneasiness entering a bank or the post office (which totally made no sense, but I was shy otherwise, so it didn´t stand out to others)

From 10 to 30something:
- images, scenarios of me approaching my pl ex family, they hadn´t seen me for years. These always appeared at the time of falling asleep.

I have the idea that others if not all that have experienced a violent death also carried such a blueprint along which might be the cause of the longing and eagerness to fulfill certain missions/meet certain people.
Any thoughts, support, counterarguments are very much appreciated and welcome.
I only try to make sense of myself and my behavior..

 

[landsend]

Glia as you know I have similar experiences / feelings to you as we died in similar circumstances, and I recall driving a red pickup in the hour prior to my death.

As a kid I always had a repulsion to pickups, which I realised carried into adulthood. Now I’ve realised where it’s come from, the repulsion has disappeared for me.

The way I see it is that life is a journey, a journey that doesn’t end with death. It’s well documented within Tibetan culture that the state of ones death does influence the next life. The Tibetan Book of Death outlines this, and has rituals to help ensure that the dying person dies with favourable circumstances.

Actually I’ve been wondering about this all myself, as I’m not the Green Beret I once was in that life, but more the energy patterns that I carried at the end of that life — the broken, lost man, the prisoner, the man full with sorrow. The wandering soul.

I also have a repulsion to certain buildings; nearly had panic attacks in buildings that look similar in any way to my past selves death situation. Especially if I have to stand, waiting in such a place. The panic is such that I feel I’m waiting for my death.

 

[Totoro]

I think in general, all kinds of things are possible... even if one may not have had a traumatic life or end of life experience. I most certainly think having those experiences contributes in some way to your next life, in the expression of ears, phobias ect.

However, I also think it's possible to be much more subtle than that. I even think looking over your life and maybe choosing another career or something like that.

I think reflecting and deciding on what we want to accomplish is a normal part of the reincarnation process. However, I think too, much like how the circumstances of our childhood affect us in adult hood, our past lives also affect us now as well.

Micheal Newton's books are a good read, as he came to discover reincarnation (for himself) while using hypnosis to help someone overcome their fear of heights, only to find that the fear was rooted in something that happened in a past life. That's why I feel that researching your own past lives can be very therapeutic.

 

[KenJ]

- uneasiness entering a bank or the post office (which totally made no sense, but I was shy otherwise, so it didn´t stand out to others)

It could very well be a second lifetime memory.

 

[Klaud]

The not so pleasant things like trauma and phobias seem to be a lot more prevalent, although I do think some of the smaller personality quirks can carry over as well.

My Native American past life (the most recent one I can remember) definitely has the most carryover into my present one. He died feeling extremely guilty and like he needed to make it up to someone who he wasn't able to save in his final moments.

My whole life, I knew I was waiting for someone but couldn't figure out why and when I finally met her, that guilt started to surface very quickly.

 

[glia21]

Glia as you know I have similar experiences / feelings to you as we died in similar circumstances, and I recall driving a red pickup in the hour prior to my death.

As a kid I always had a repulsion to pickups, which I realised carried into adulthood. Now I’ve realised where it’s come from, the repulsion has disappeared for me.

The way I see it is that life is a journey, a journey that doesn’t end with death. It’s well documented within Tibetan culture that the state of ones death does influence the next life. The Tibetan Book of Death outlines this, and has rituals to help ensure that the dying person dies with favourable circumstances.

Actually I’ve been wondering about this all myself, as I’m not the Green Beret I once was in that life, but more the energy patterns that I carried at the end of that life — the broken, lost man, the prisoner, the man full with sorrow. The wandering soul.

I also have a repulsion to certain buildings; nearly had panic attacks in buildings that look similar in any way to my past selves death situation. Especially if I have to stand, waiting in such a place. The panic is such that I feel I’m waiting for my death.

Landsend, I was thinking of you when I was having the idea that the last thoughts/circumstances might be a special trigger, something that lasts longer, something that returns to you when you return to time-space and start all over again, especially when it was a violent and unexpected death like being shot - or having an accident. Other memories will or will not return. I wonder if these babies that cry a lot the first months, which is said to be an inability to adjust to life and/or stomach ache due to digestive tract problems, might try to work these things out.

 

[glia21]

It could very well be a second lifetime memory.

What makes you think it might be a second lifetime memory?
Sure it could be, but I tend to believe it is the same one. I was thinking this thru some time ago, working out different scenarios but there was a clear difference between what I was "creating"/ "making-up" to what I got. It´s not only the bits of information, pictures and flashbacks it´s the deeper knowledge best described as "heck, I know who I am". you know. I might be wrong, but hey, then again, I know who I am.

 

[glia21]

The not so pleasant things like trauma and phobias seem to be a lot more prevalent, although I do think some of the smaller personality quirks can carry over as well.

My Native American past life (the most recent one I can remember) definitely has the most carryover into my present one. He died feeling extremely guilty and like he needed to make it up to someone who he wasn't able to save in his final moments.

My whole life, I knew I was waiting for someone but couldn't figure out why and when I finally met her, that guilt started to surface very quickly.

Hi Klaud,
thank you for your input! I used to remember a native american life too but kind of lost it during adolescence and by now I cannot tell for sure how real it was. I could have made it up as well. I had a name and a tribe, but can´t remember anymore. Anyway, this wasn´t my most recent one. But funny thing, I know I carried along a deep interest in native american culture into my last PLs as well. I sometimes have conversation

with a chief I think I used to know​

, mostly when I´m walking somewhere alone.. (and, no, it´s not a real voice I hear, I don´t hear voices or get orders, don´t worry )

What you are saying supports my theory. The condition you´re in, the longing you have comes to the surface easily.
I would like to hear more about your story, did you write about it already?

 

[landsend]

Landsend, I was thinking of you when I was having the idea that the last thoughts/circumstances might be a special trigger, something that lasts longer, something that returns to you when you return to time-space and start all over again, especially when it was a violent and unexpected death like being shot - or having an accident. Other memories will or will not return. I wonder if these babies that cry a lot the first months, which is said to be an inability to adjust to life and/or stomach ache due to digestive tract problems, might try to work these things out.

I've been thinking about this, too.

My daughter was one of those babies, but she does have a milk allergy, too. She's still a fussy madam, has strange phobias. Hates socks if they are not right, hates getting wet (socks/her sleeves), never has liked rice (she's fussy about many foods, but has never, ever eaten rice). Has a fear of loud noises and fireworks. She's advanced and speaks like an adult. I wonder if she was in Nam with me at times. If not then another war, maybe WWII Pacific campaign, due to the hating rice. Funny when I was pregnant with her rice made me sick, couldn't eat it, even the sight of it would turn my stomach. I'm sure interesting times ahead with her... she reminds me of me in a lot of ways. The other day when I was putting her for a nap she was asking me for her 'suit' that she keeps in a box. I have no idea what she was talking about... that's just the tip of the iceberg. She often uses American terms for things, but I wonder if she has picked that up from kids shows.

How were you as a baby? According to my mom I was pretty chilled out. I was a very clingy kid, and especially attached to my dad. I do wonder why this trauma never surfaced for me as a young kid. I used to have a recurring dream of falling off the second floor banister of a mall. I now realise that the lighting/look of that mall was the exact same as the building I recall being shot in -- and I recall falling 'backwards' when shot. In fact, when recalling the building in meditations I had the sense of dejavu, a feeling that I've seen this building in my dreams many times, but have forgotten. That feeling has come back to me several times when recalling Terry's memories, the feeling that I'm recalling something I knew as a child. Why did the amnesia occur? My going theory is that it was to protect my growing sense of self in this life.

Then, there is the fact that I've repressed a lot, my internal gender being one of those things. It's probably no coincidence that my gender issues have surfaced with Terry's memories. They were locked together in the same box.

 

[KenJ]

What makes you think it might be a second lifetime memory?

uneasiness entering a bank or the post office (which totally made no sense, but I was shy otherwise, so it didn´t stand out to others)

Just that comment.

 

[Klaud]

Hi Klaud,
thank you for your input! I used to remember a native american life too but kind of lost it during adolescence and by now I cannot tell for sure how real it was. I could have made it up as well. I had a name and a tribe, but can´t remember anymore. Anyway, this wasn´t my most recent one. But funny thing, I know I carried along a deep interest in native american culture into my last PLs as well. I sometimes have conversation

with a chief I think I used to know​

, mostly when I´m walking somewhere alone.. (and, no, it´s not a real voice I hear, I don´t hear voices or get orders, don´t worry )

What you are saying supports my theory. The condition you´re in, the longing you have comes to the surface easily.
I would like to hear more about your story, did you write about it already?

Sounds like you're really in tune with something or other. I haven't written about it here, but I certainly can:

I don't know what tribe it was, just a general location (I'm in the process of trying to figure that out) and that there weren't any founded western states yet. My wife in that lifetime and I have seemingly been together in some form for at least a handful of incarnations at this point. In most of them she had been like a mentor or someone that I could learn from.

In that past life, my wife and I were killed by another tribe with arrows. I actually took an arrow right in the sternum trying to shield her. My last thoughts were a promise that I'd always try to protect her in this life and the next, even though I'd just failed miserably in doing so. She was killed right after me and then it was over.

I was vaguely aware of two past lives as a child, but all my toddler mind could really process in relation to this one was that this person would come back eventually.

When I finally found her this time around, that guilt was killing me, but I had no reason to protect her. Not out of a lack of concern, but a lack of physical danger. We weren't in the wild west anymore, so there was literally no reason for me to do any of that. Took a while, but I was able to let all of that go.

 

[glia21]

I've been thinking about this, too.

My daughter was one of those babies, but she does have a milk allergy, too. She's still a fussy madam, has strange phobias. Hates socks if they are not right, hates getting wet (socks/her sleeves), never has liked rice (she's fussy about many foods, but has never, ever eaten rice). Has a fear of loud noises and fireworks. She's advanced and speaks like an adult. I wonder if she was in Nam with me at times. If not then another war, maybe WWII Pacific campaign, due to the hating rice. Funny when I was pregnant with her rice made me sick, couldn't eat it, even the sight of it would turn my stomach. I'm sure interesting times ahead with her... she reminds me of me in a lot of ways. The other day when I was putting her for a nap she was asking me for her 'suit' that she keeps in a box. I have no idea what she was talking about... that's just the tip of the iceberg. She often uses American terms for things, but I wonder if she has picked that up from kids shows.

How were you as a baby? According to my mom I was pretty chilled out. I was a very clingy kid, and especially attached to my dad. I do wonder why this trauma never surfaced for me as a young kid. I used to have a recurring dream of falling off the second floor banister of a mall. I now realise that the lighting/look of that mall was the exact same as the building I recall being shot in -- and I recall falling 'backwards' when shot. In fact, when recalling the building in meditations I had the sense of dejavu, a feeling that I've seen this building in my dreams many times, but have forgotten. That feeling has come back to me several times when recalling Terry's memories, the feeling that I'm recalling something I knew as a child. Why did the amnesia occur? My going theory is that it was to protect my growing sense of self in this life.

Then, there is the fact that I've repressed a lot, my internal gender being one of those things. It's probably no coincidence that my gender issues have surfaced with Terry's memories. They were locked together in the same box.

Hi,
As a baby I was much like your daughter, I had milk allergy too and it took the doctors a looong time to realize this -- and when they finally did I also didn´t want the soy milk they tried to feed me - so was in trouble and almost starving. My grandmother then started to feed me ordinary beef soup and that was practically the only thing I would want to eat. I was crying a lot, too. At birth I had a skull fracture, but my mom can´t remember that at all. I only found out recently because it was quoted in my mother and child pass, right after my birth, so no idea what happened. This seems to happen sometimes with forceps delivery and such - but my delivery was normal..

I was difficult with tights and dresses, didn´t want them and I didn´t want to even hold a doll (they made me on an old kindergarten pic and I was really mad about it ). During infancy I was sick a lot and at the age of 5 I developed leukemia symptoms but it wasn´t leukemia, whatever it was it disappeared by itself or by the cortisone I got.
So after all, I´m very glad my kids are so much easier to handle! Happy with their gender, and except for minor things easy going.
My son hates buttons - he never ever would wear a shirt with a button and he is as dutiful as can be. *shrug*
My daughter is the one sneaking downstairs at midnight, looking for the tablet to play a game instead of sleeping.
And the little one is trying to boss everybody around.