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Confused and intimidated

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sellingmysoul

New Member
Hi, I'm not good at introductions, my name's Vincent, and I have nightmares almost every night, of being pursued by some thing(it varies from one nightmare to another), I don't know why, except that it has to do with something from a past life. I don't know how I know, I just do. I've had these nightmares as far back as I can remember. In recent years they've become more horrific. I have no idea why, I just want them to stop.
 
Welcome to the forum,


Can you tell us more about your nightmares? Be as specific as you can regarding details so they we may help you discern if they are viable past life memories or are symbolic to your life now.


I look forward to your post.
 
Hi Selling,


You sound pretty desperate, but all that we can do is provide you with resources that will give you some insight. We can't solve your nightmare problem, but we can give you better resources, if you can be much more specific in your description of the problem. Anything could be helpful.


Is it the pushing part that never changes? Or, is every nightmare the same? Have you talked to family members about this? How far back can you remember having these nightmares? Do the nightmares happen in a dark scene? Or, a bright scene with color? Can you describe any other features of the nightmares, other than the feeling of being pushed? You indicated that your nightmares are getting more intense. Some folks might say that you are nearing the same age as you were in a past life when something traumatic happened. How old (young) are you right now?


Have you considered going to a Therapist, who specializes in Past Life regression?


-Nightrain
 
Welcome to the forum.


When I was a young man, I was plagued with nightmares, endlessly it seemed. I was so frightened by them that I would sometimes sit up all night trying not to fall asleep but that made everything worse and caused other problems. Out of desperation, I started writing the dreams down into a notebook. I did this faithfully and would wake myself up to write in the notebook when I had a dream. After a while the nature of the dreams began to change and the frightening aspect of the dreams began to go away. The things that were always chasing me and trying to get me became things that I could face in the dream and I told them to go away and that I wasn't going to allow them to bother me anymore. The nightmares were replaced by lucid dreams and I realized that I was on a spiritual quest for enlightenment. I realized that I had been coming to terms with who and what I am and with how I should be living my life - I had been at war with myself.


I bought a lot of dream books but they never helped me to interpret the dreams like I hoped that they would - they were far too generalized and didn't seem to apply to anything happening in my life. I began to make my own dictionary of terms - a list of recurring "things" in the dreams and I began to find some meaning in those things in the way that they fit together in the dream and in how the way that all those things fit together in a meaningful way for me.


I wouldn't understand the dreams right away but after a couple of days it would seem as though some insight into the dream would come to me. I think that the analysis of the dream was occurring in the unconscious mind and it would take a while to filter back into my consciousness.


The insight into what was going on inside of me and how that related to how I was living my life set me onto a path of learning about the nature of our existence that has been personally rewarding to me in this lifetime. I think that now, in hindsight, I would characterize that horrible time of the nightmares as an awakening to the potential advancement that I could achieve in this incarnation if I would just walk that path of enlightenment.


Perhaps, my own experience could be of help to you.
 
Nightrain, stardis, thank you for your replies. I'll try to be as descriptive as I can. Like stardis, I have had nightmares from as far back as I can remember, which is from 5 years old til now, at the age of 39. I used to stay awake too, scared to fall asleep. Like stardis, I tried keeping a dream journal, I consulted dream dictionaries, I tried making my own dream dictionary, but nothing gave me any results. The dreams haven't changed, except to get worse. The nightmares are always dark, sometimes I'm outside, sometimes inside. When inside, I can never see what's pursuing me. Sometimes the building I'm in is demon-possessed, sometimes not. When I'm outside in the nightmares, I can sometimes see what's pursuing me. This is worse than not seeing what it is that's chasing me. It always changes, though, the thing chasing me. There's a sense of being hunted down for something I've done, or failed to do. Sometimes I'm sitting at a computer, trying to contact someone, whom I can never contact. The person is always a girl. I don't know if that's significant. Sometimes I'm with someone while running from whatever is pursuing me. I'm always with a girl in these dreams. Whenever I see what's pursuing me, it's always some monster. It's always dark, inside or out, whether it's day or night in the dream. As far as talking to others, no. I can't talk to my family about the dreams, they wouldn't understand, or take what I'm telling them seriously. And as far as seeing a therapist goes, I can't afford to see a therapist, as much as I'd like to. That's just not an option. The nightmares have gotten more...intense, more gorey. I don't want to go into details about that, though, it's disturbing to me. That's all I can remember at the moment, if I remember any more details I will relate them, but I really would prefere not to mention anything about how gorey the nightmares have gotten, it's just sick, and it upsets me.
 
Maybe you're stuck in a vicious cycle of nightmares and dark feelings that the dream is leaving you in. For me, breaking a cycle of negative thoughts is crucial for my well-being. I don't say that lightly because I have been struggling for some time with problems but I also recognize that nothing will change unless I take the steps to make that change.


Changing your thought patterns is difficult but it is important to believe that we are meant to be happy and loving creatures. I try to project that feeling of love for others all the time- really. I am around a lot of people most everyday and by projecting a feeling of love for others I get that back - I get a lot of hugs from women and men. You have to cultivate that sense of love inside of you. Remember that consciousness creates, it creates your reality - it truly does. Over time things will get better, but you have to change the thought pattern and break the negative cycle and then the love that you are cultivating for others will begin to come back to you. When I find myself sliding back into a pattern of dark, negative thoughts I meditate on the meaning of life and the multi-dimensional nature of our reality and when I get a chance, I go outside in the sunlight and try to have a calm and prayerful mind.


Maybe a good way to make a change that could break that cycle of nightmares and dread would be to join other people in volunteering at a food bank or homeless shelter. I have found a lot of inspiration when working around less fortunate people. Being around physically challenged people has also given me this strange sense of strength and happiness because I think that the disabled often have a more positive outlook on life than people like myself have. My wife, who is disabled, is a good example for me when I get to feeling like the whole world is lousy.


Try to concentrate on the Love of the Creator - think about that and read everything thing you can about it; there are a lot of good things to read and think about. Fill your waking hours with thoughts of Love and Light because those are real things that will help you.
 
I used to have dreams where I was in a house. Most of the rooms were fine but there was always one that I wouldn't go into because an evil monster thing was in there. A few times I tried to go in (I came to realize I was dreaming) but it tried to scare me out. Eventually I realized that that room was representing a memory that I had been repressing. It was from this life, but it was something that had happened when I was really small, I had some memory of it but didn't remember the whole incident. Once the memory became clear, the dreams disappeared.


The other day I had something sort of similar, but instead of representing a memory, in this dream the upstairs apartment represented a person I have problems with now and I knew that while dreaming it. I was in a house and it had that apartment upstairs and I wanted to go upstairs in that apartment hoping to find it empty (meaning the person moved on, went to find someone else to stress out) but expecting to find something bad instead. I couldn't get anyone to go there with me because everyone else was scared to go in there.


Finally I woke up after getting annoyed with everyone in that dream. After waking up I still wanted to know what it was up there that I was worried about, so I imagined myself back in the dream and let mind go into a sort of dream/daydreaming state and grabbed a ladder in the dream and went to look inside the upstairs apartment window (safer that way then going up through the inside of the house, lol). I can't really type all of what I saw but the things I saw in there gave me some insight on what was going on with this person.


Maybe in your case if facing head on the thing that is bothering you, could you try in your dream (if you become aware that is what is happening) or right after you wake up, either imagine you have a hidden microphone or camera where this thing is haunting so you can look at it 'safely' in your dream or try looking in the window from the outside. It might be a good trick to get past any fear of this thing when you feel there is distance or a barrier between you and it.
 
If the thing that is pursuing you changes is it a dream about a past life experience?.


I would have thought that if the dream relates to a previous experience it would remain the same.


I know a dream I occasionally have that I recounted also under hypnosis does not change, and it is this unchanging nature that makes me think to some extent that it arises from a past life rather than my sub conscious ruminating over an issue.


I agree with earlier posts and respectfully suggest investigating the matter with a good therapist, but keeping your mind open about past life issues.
 
Hi sellingmysoul,


My first thought on reading your attempt to describe the dreams of being chased, how it is so 'unformed' and indistinct, not knowing exactly what was chasing you, if it was inside or outside, just that it is dark and your are terrified, is that if this is some kind of past life experience (as you think it may be) is that it may have happened to you as a child where you didn't really understand what was happening to you at the time? If you were a child you might have had a feeling that something 'supernatural' was chasing you, when it was really man with a gun or something else unknown in the dark. Maybe there are several similar experiences being jumbled up together in your subconscious?


Some of my memories from a past childhood are similarly bewildering, because as a little child I didn't really understand what was going on at the time. For whatever reason some people have the same unpleasant thing happen to them more than once.


My suggestion to try to delve into this more deeply (which is the way to make the dreams stop ultimately) is to try some simple meditation techniques while you are awake and will have a bit more control over the situation than when you are asleep. This way you can learn to face whatever the fear is so you can begin to deal with it.


Deliberately place yourself in a very safe environment, like in your living room - sit in a comfortable chair, close your eyes, relax, take some deep breaths and so on - and take yourself into the experience of being 'chased'. Don't be afraid. Remind yourself you are an adult and perfectly safe in your own home and whatever is going on is only between your ears and can't really hurt you.


Are you male or female? How old might you be? What century might it be? What (or who) is chasing you? Is there a war on? Are there bombs? Is there a fire? Is it an animal chasing you or a person? Is anyone else with you? Who is the girl? Sister? Cousin? Girlfriend? Wife? Just go with the first thought that comes, however outlandish (or banal) it might seem at first. Just go along with the 'picture show' and watch what happens. If it is fuzzy at first, that's OK. If there is more than one image, just pick one and follow that thread. Just stay with it and try to bring it into better focus. What can you see? Are you in a wood? In a house? In a street? Even a tiny detail will help you to get started.


If you get panicky, just stop. That's OK. Just wiggle your toes or open your eyes and remind yourself that you are safe and not in danger now. In a while or a couple of days, have another try. It gets easier.


Best of luck.
 
tanguerra, thank you for your advice! The only thing, though, that's indistinct about the nightmares is not knowing what's chasing me while I'm inside a building in the dream. As I said in my earlier post, sometimes I'm outside, sometimes inside. When I'm outside, I can see what's chasing me, and seeing it is worse than not seeing it. When I'm inside, I can't see what's chasing me. That's the only indistinct feature of the dream, when I'm dreaming of being chased indoors. The dreams are dark and gloomy, whether it's daytime or nighttime in the dream, but I can still make out every feature of my surroundings. When I'm with someone in the dreams, it's normally a girl, we're running together, and I'm better able to deal with the fear, I'm more concerned about protecting her than in saving my own skin, although at some point in the dream the girl usually disappears and then I spend the rest of the dream looking for the girl. Being chased is not as important to me at that point, the focus of the dream becomes finding the girl.
 
Ok. That helps to narrow it down. So it's not quite as confused as it sounds really. The events follow a certain pattern? First you're inside, then outside, for example?


Obviously, if this is a past life memory, you are not really being chased by a 'monster' but obviously you are very scared. If it is a 'monster' it's not a past life memory, but a common garden variety nightmare. If it's not a 'monster' chasing you, what might it really be? Most likely it's a man with a gun or something. Can you describe the building? Is it a house, a ruin or...? What country would you imagine it to be in? What century? How old do you feel in the dream? A child? A teenager? An adult? What is your relationship with the girl? What happens next? Do you ever get to the end of the dream? Do you ever get caught? Do you die? Don't know? If so what do you 'fear' will happen next?


As I suggested try to put yourself into a relaxed and self-suggestible state and get into the experience when waking. Take at least 5 or 10 minutes to really breathe deeply. Count at least 20 long slow breaths for example - think about nothing else but counting your breaths. If you lose track or get distracted, start again - it's all part of the process of quieting the internal chatter - like stilling the pond so you can see below the surface. It is important to relax properly and clear your mind before you go into the dream or you won't get very far below the 'surface' level anxiety that you feel about the whole business.


Once you are 'there', go into the start of the dream. Try to get it clarified in your mind more. Start off slowly and look carefully at all the details, the bricks and stones and whatever else you can see around you. Don't rush. Whether it is a past life memory or simply some deep anxiety coming from your subconscious, this will help you to feel more in control of the situation even when you are having the dream. While you are doing it, if you start to get nervous, remember, this can't really harm you, although it is obviously very upsetting, just push past the fear and notice what is going on around you in as much detail as possible.


Try to get to the end of the dream in your 'waking' practice, even if you get 'eaten' by the 'monster' in the end, this may provide you with some kind of psychological release if you can control the images and bring them to some kind of resolution in your own mind and realise you are in fact safe from harm.


Best of luck to you.
 
After really reflecting on the nature of my dreams, and the earliest impressions I had of having lived before, I'd like to elaborate on these impressions. I can't say with any certainty at what age they came to me, but I was probably 7 or 8 years old when these impressions came to me. I had this strong conviction that in another time and place, I had had a girlfriend, someone I was betrothed to, and she was killed by a witch. No, not a stereo-typical witch with a pointed hat and a flying broomstick, but a Wiccan or follower of some other ancient pagan practice. I had the impression that this 'witch' was, for some reason, set to do me as much harm as she could, and that killing my girlfriend was the one thing calculated to hurt me the most. I can't recall any impressions I had as to why this woman was so set on hurting me. My strongest impression is of the pain I felt on knowing that she'd killed my girlfriend and I was unable to do anything to stop her. I'd failed. Whether I was away at the time and thus unable to stop her, or because some other circumstance prevented me, I do not know. I only have a sense of having failed to prevent the woman I loved from being murdered. The pain I felt from this was too much for me to express at the time, and the frustration it gave me was so intense that after a time, I gave up on trying to make sense of it all, and dismissed these things as the result of an over-active imagination. I can't give anymore details of these impressions, there were never names of people or places, and the strongest impressions I had were of the loss of my girlfriend and the sense that I would meet her again sometime. I also had a fear that the 'witch' would take her from me again, if she could. This is the extent of what I can recall from that age.
 
I would think that would certainly give you nightmares - especially knowing that at such a young age. Do you do any meditation exercises? Have you thought about trying the regression cd's?
 
Uh.... are you referring to regression CDs in general, or specific CDs? (I risk sounding stupid here, or did I blow any chance at sounding intelligent some time ago?) No, I don't meditate, but I do have some hypnosis recordings that I listen to.
 
Thanks, that was funny - I needed that today.


I was thinking of the CDs listed in the forum FAQs. Here is the link.


I have the Weiss CDs and I like them but haven't been able to use them like I was hoping that I could - not enough time to myself this past year. What I found was that you need to listen to them a number of times without trying to "remember" anything - just so you get used to what is on the CD and then just use it as a kind of background because I think that just relaxing your mind is the most important thing.


I wouldn't discount your imagination because I think it is a powerful tool that is there to be used. Weiss mentions that on one of those CDs.
 
Good progress Vincent.


It could be you have some 'baggage' with both these women - the 'witch' and the betrothed. You must have done something to upset the wiccan to make her so mad at you for instance! Whether what you are remembering/dreaming is exactly what happened once long ago, or is still a bit fuzzy, there are likely to be elements of truth in there somewhere and it is a good starting point for further exploration.


You say the bad dreams started getting more frequent and more frightening recently? In my experience when things like this start 'arcing up', your subconscious is trying to tell you something, but you are not listening, so it has to shout. The best way to ease the situation is to start to pay serious attention to the issue rather than try to block it out. You have made a good step in that direction by writing in to the forum about it all. I hope it is helping.


It is also possible that you are about to (or already have?) met one or both of the women involved in this story? I don't know why, but often it happens like that. People will start remembering things, then 'bam!' they meet one of the people involved. Has anyone new come into your life recently? If not, keep your eyes open when you meet someone new, especially if they give you a 'funny feeling'!


As Stardis has said, trying to get more details by using various meditation techniques (such as the one I described above) or the CDs is a good way to start getting to the bottom of it.


Keeping a journal is a great exercise. Writing into the forum is good, but there's nothing like keeping a private journal as well. Even if you don't have much to write about at first, it's amazing how having a pen and paper in your hands can help organise your thoughts and sometimes new things will come to you when you are writing too.


Keep note of when you have the dreams for instance, what happened exactly, was anything different? If you do a meditation exercise or CD session, write about it all immediately afterwards while it is all fresh in your mind. Even small details can be significant and although it can all seem very clear at the time, like a dream, sometimes it can fade after a while, not to mention a couple of years. Sometimes people have amazing insights about things when they look back over their journals and see a pattern they had not noticed before.
 
It's strange, it's contradictory, but despite the anguish and torture caused by the nightmares, I am hesitant to try regression. Call it cowardice, but I'm scared to be regressed. I don't know why. Just the idea makes my skin crawl. Call me chicken;i'm comfortable with that nomenclature. Cluck, cluck, cluck!
 
Just try a simple meditation exercise such as I described above for starters. If you get nervous, just open your eyes. Simple.


It really is not that hard to start getting some more information on these things, particularly since this one is obviously pretty close to the surface already.


Just give it a go. Be brave. What have you got to lose? Only the nightmares. :)
 
sellingmysoul said:
It's strange, it's contradictory, but despite the anguish and torture caused by the nightmares, I am hesitant to try regression. Call it cowardice, but I'm scared to be regressed. I don't know why. Just the idea makes my skin crawl. Call me chicken;i'm comfortable with that nomenclature. Cluck, cluck, cluck!
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A lot of people feel the same way about regression as you do. Is it because you feel that you wouldn't be in control? that you might be drawn into a past life memory and get stuck there? I can assure you, that you are in control at all times. The regressionist is only there to help you reach that altered state, and then steer you in the right direction. You're not going to see anything that you are physically unable to cope with.


Having said that, it's not always an easy ride either. You can often experience unpleasant things that happened in the past, but the benefits of releasing the emotions surrounding those events far outweigh the few moments of discomfort you feel while remembering them.
 
tanguerra said:
Just try a simple meditation exercise such as I described above for starters. If you get nervous, just open your eyes. Simple.
It really is not that hard to start getting some more information on these things, particularly since this one is obviously pretty close to the surface already.


Just give it a go. Be brave. What have you got to lose? Only the nightmares. :)
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Gosh, I never really quite looked at it like that. Indeed what has one got to lose? Like Vincent, I too am scared of adding more stress and emotions to the one's I already feel, by meditation or hypnosis; but as you and Chris and especially as stardis pointed out, we are stuck in a vicious cycle anyway... what could we possibly add to the trauma's that we aren't already going thro from some of these memories? And the alternatives that you all speak of could be very therapeutic.


I think I will give it a try, what about you Vincent? :)
 
Some people may be afraid of what they may find out about their past life. However, it is in the past, and it is not who you are anymore. It may shed some light on things that have been bothering you for years, and allow you to acknowledge them and put them into their proper context.
 
sellingmysoul said:
It's strange, it's contradictory, but despite the anguish and torture caused by the nightmares, I am hesitant to try regression. Call it cowardice, but I'm scared to be regressed. I don't know why. Just the idea makes my skin crawl. Call me chicken;i'm comfortable with that nomenclature. Cluck, cluck, cluck!
Click to expand...
Hi Selling!


If you have an opportunity to read Brian Weiss' books, you'll find that his patients walked in suffering from such a variety of present life problems as you could imagine. And, in each case those problems cleared up by the process of regression. There is absolutely nothing to fear. What's the worst that could happen?


-Nightrain
 
Hi Sellingmysoul,


I like to meditate at night, just as I am getting ready for sleep. That is the time I am most relaxed.I have used Brian Weiss' mediation CD, but not in quite awhile. There are numerous CD's out there that I really enjoy. My favorites are Hemisync http://www.hemi-sync.com/shopdisplayproducts.asp?id=242&cat=Meditation, and I also have one of Tibetan Bells. It is so relaxing to just let go.


I have had nightmares on and off over the years. They are no fun. Keeping a dream journal helped me out. I also learned how to set my dream intent before sleep, which is usually to learn all I need to learn from my dreams. After many years of practice, while in the dream state I can tell myself that a dream is just a dream. When I do this, usually my subconscious chooses to go elsewhere.


From what you described, especially your emotion around the nightmares, it sounds like they could be past life related. I suggest you set your dream intent to learn all you can about them, and then write them down the moment you wake up.


I look forward to reading more.
 
Eternal Light said:
Gosh, I never really quite looked at it like that. Indeed what has one got to lose? Like Vincent, I too am scared of adding more stress and emotions to the one's I already feel, by meditation or hypnosis; but as you and Chris and especially as stardis pointed out, we are stuck in a vicious cycle anyway... what could we possibly add to the trauma's that we aren't already going thro from some of these memories? And the alternatives that you all speak of could be very therapeutic.
I think I will give it a try, what about you Vincent? :)
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Eternal Light, thank you for trying to, like everyone else, help. I'm not doing the regression, though, and every time someone tries to persuade me to do this, it sets my determination not to do it. After reading Susie's last post, I think this is the way for me to go. I hope others will stop urging me to try being regressed. It's just not going to happen, and everyone would be better served by letting the idea of my being regressed go, to not even refer to it anymore.
 
HI,


You stated in the first post that you just know your nightmares are past life related but have not stated anything about them. :freak:


You have also mentioned your distaste for religion and anything spiritual.

Deborah, right now I don't care if what I'm experiencing are memories from a past life. I just want the nightmares to end.
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Jeremy Taylor, (A wonderful man) who has worked with dreams for forty years makes an interesting side note on his webpage.


First a little about him:

Founding member and past president of the Association for the Study of Dreams, he has written three books integrating dream symbolism, mythology, and archetypal energy. The latest is: The Living Labyrinth: Universal Themes in Myths, Dreams and the Symbolism of Waking Life. His earlier books, Where People Fly and Water Runs Uphill, and Dream Work, have been translated into many languages.
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The point of interest here is he states:

"I realize this is an unusual and radical idea, but I have made the suggestion to many parents that they talk about spiritual/religious issues in the family both with each other and with the child having night terrors, and when they have done so, many report the night terrors are greatly lessened, if not completely gone. Nothing scientifically provable, but I'm certainly accumulating quite a bit of anecdotal evidence.
© Jeremy Taylor, 2007
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I wonder.........could he be on to something here? :coffee:
 
Deborah, I have mentioned quite a bit about my dreams in other posts on this forum. I mentioned that, in my dreams, I'm constantly being pursued by some thing, that in these dreams, when they take place in outdoor settings, I can see the thing chasing me, and it's always worse to see it than to not see it. When the dream setting is indoors, I never see what's chasing me. Frequently, I am with a girl when I'm being chased, and quite often, at some point in the dreams, I become seperated from the girl, and can't find her. The focus of the dreams then change to me trying to find the girl, but to no avail. I've mentioned other things, like the dreams always being dark, whether inside or outside, whether it's day or night. I've mentioned that some dreams are quite disturbing in the things I see and experience in them, that the dreams get gory, very gory, to the point that it sickens me, becomes overly disgusting. I also mentioned that in some of my dreams the houses or buildings I'm in are demon-possessed. I didn't go into detail, with the demon-possession, but the demon, or whatever entity it is, is trying to possess me. I haven't discussed the dreams in a whole lot of detail, but I have mentioned the major, relevant facts. I have mentioned, in another post, maybe in another thread, that when I was about 7 or 8 years old, I began getting impressions of another time and place, wherein I had a girlfriend who was murdered by a witch. Not a stereo-typical witch, but a practitioner of Wicca, or some other pagan practice. This witch murdered my girlfriend to get to me, for something I did, or failed to do. These impressions were beyond my ability to express at the time, and this frustrated me a great deal. These impressions never came with details of people's names, or place names, I just had the very strong impression that in some other time, some other place, I had a girlfriend I was betrothed to, that she was murdered, and that the witch who killed her would somehow find her in a future place, and kill her again if she could, just to get back at me for whatever I'd done to this witch. I had the impression that this witch was determined to find us, me and my girlfriend, in whatever future time or place we found ourselves in, and to kill my girlfriend in every future life she reincarnated in. I don't know how to explain these impressions, where they came from, what they were, but they were very strong, and because I couldn't express myself back then, I dismissed them as being the product of an over-active imagination. Deborah, I'm sorry if you didn't see those posts, and maybe I haven't been expressing myself adequately in my posts. If this is the case, I apologize. I'm trying very hard to remember things that have caused me a lot of pain, things I haven't been able to talk about before I found this forum. I've never talked with anyone about these things before, and I'm having problems finding the right way to express these things now. If I haven't been doing that very accurately, I apologize, I'm trying to deal with years and years of frustration, and it's all coming out in a rush now. I feel confused because I am still unsure how to put these things into words. I know what I feel, what I've felt, about the dreams and the impressions from my childhood, are connected, they have something to do with a past life, I will stake my life on that! I just have a lot to sort out, and if I've been inadequate or innapropriate in doing this, I am sorry.
 
No need to apologize.....you are doing fine. We are here to help - if we can.


Side note before I run out the door- symbolically about being chased in a dream:

I Am Fleeing For My Life!
The basic metaphor in chase dreams is usually the "death" that I am so desperately trying to avoid. "Death" in the dream world is the single most frequent archetypal image of growth and development that the unconscious has to offer. (Dreams do depict psycho-spiritual growth and change in other ways, but death is by far the most common and universal.)


Therefore, if I dream that I am being pursued by dream characters who are out to get me, it is usually a symbolic representation of fleeing from insistent interior promptings, telling me that it is time to grow and change and let go of some cherished notion about who I am. To grow and change, life energies have to be withdrawn from the outmoded parts of my self-image, no matter how good or useful they may have been at one time. This withdrawal of life energy looks symbolically like death.


© Jeremy Taylor, 1996
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Hmmmmm. Interesting Deborah. There could be things going on, on a number of levels. What do you think sellingmysoul?


Firstly, your struggles with organised religion and belief systems and so on in this life that you have talked about, secondly the past life trauma that you remembered in your childhood but couldn't really talk about to anyone, thirdly the increasingly scary nightmares, fourthly...? All this won't be unravelled in one day or even one week, but that's OK - there's no such thing as time anyway :) .


If thinking about regression or meditation at this point is just all too much, it would be wise to do everything else you can to create some health and calm in your body and your mind, as this will help with your 'spiritual' issues (yes, really). Our body, mind and spirit are all highly interactive and one will not be 'right' if the others are not also 'right'. The body is a relatively easy one to tend to, so why not start there?


It probably sounds incredibly mundane and boring, when you are talking about wiccans and demons and so on, but you need to make sure you are not taking too many stimulants - coffee, nicotine, alcohol, sugar, loud music, violent TV shows, talkback radio, video games and so on (especially before bed). If you can't cut these things out of your life completely, at least cut them in half and see how that goes for starters. If you already don't indulge in these things, good!


It is important to eat proper, healthy, fresh food - no processed, sugary or junk food containing various chemicals and colourings which are bad for you anyway, but can do all sorts of funny things to your body and brain chemistry. Get plenty of exercise. Take at least half an hour out of every day to walk, for example, especially if you can go for a nice long walk somewhere beautiful and tranquil, then sit on a bench, by some water and think about 'nothing'. Very relaxing and healthful for mind and body.


If you are on any kind of medication make sure you have a chat with your doctor about your increasingly bad dreams and general anxiety levels. Can't hurt, eh?


Don't get me wrong, I'm not saying your experiences are all in your head or are all to do with junk food or too much TV. I am saying that the more you can eliminate the 'bad' things in your body, the more you will feel better in general and the more you can start to get some clarity about what is really going on in your psyche, which is obviously something very 'big and scary'.


All these things will do you good and make you feel better in any case, even if they don't help with the nightmares, but they probably will help, at least a little.
 
Thank you, Deborah and Tanguerra. Talking about spiritual matters may be helpful. I have an intense and passionate hatred of religion, though, and it's hard for me to talk about spirituality without bringing up emotions related to religion. The brainwashing I recieved from all my years attending church and weekly bible studies with various church members might prove to be impossible to completely erase. It's hard for me to draw a line of distinction between spirituality and religion. I know the textbook definition of the two terms, but for me, emotionally, there's very little difference. The years of struggling to reconcile Christian theology with my innate personal spiritual beliefs has caused a lot of guilt and pain. Guilt because I wanted to fit in, to find a sense of belonging, which I never have had, even with my family. When I didn't find that sense of belonging, it increased the alienation and rejection I was already feeling, and still feel. I didn't realize, years ago, that my personal spiritual beliefs can't be reconciled with religion, that it's impossible, and that this is okay. That never occurred to me, and the guilt imposed on me by well-meant but misguided church members only made things worse. I have a venomous hatred for all things religious as a result. Maybe others can understand this, maybe not. In any case, just bringing the subject up and explaining myself has been exhausting, emotionally. Need to rest now.
 
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